Staying positive doesn't mean to be happy

Changing our mindset is one of the most difficult habits to break. In fact, it’s harder than kicking a drug habit or quitting smoking. This is because it is an internal process that we are usually unaware of. Happiness is a mindset, despite what most people would have you believe. Being happy does not come from a specific person, place or thing. It is a choice and one that needs to be made continuously. One cannot guarantee you happiness but I can tell you how I worked to make myself happier and achieved a more positive life.

What worked for me was actually quite simple, I started a daily journal. In this journal I wrote down one thing that I was thankful for at the start of each day and one at the end of each day. I also chose to write down one thing I liked about myself in another section of the notebook to build my self-confidence. By beginning my with something positive to focus on, and thinking about what I would write that night, I was able to see all the amazing things that I did have in my life. The problem is, in society today our focus tends to be on what we don’t have, so much so that we miss what we do have to be grateful for.

The simple task of focusing your attention on one positive aspect of your life encourages you to think more positive and also to create more positive things to be thankful for. It sounds simple because it it, but simple is usually the best strategy. It is worth a try, it takes very little effort, its free, and you have nothing to lose from it. It really made a difference for me, especially over time, so give it a try. However, keep in mind it does take time to build a habit, just as it takes time to break one.

When you conquer Mount Everest, standing on that highest point on Earth, you feel excited and so happy for maybe those moments, days, months… But not forever. Its the same for everything and everyone. Because it is human psychology that one's success is recognised when comparing to other's efforts. And even after all the success, it is momentary. After a while, you wont feel that happiness. So, how to be happy?

When you are hungry, you bought things and made food, you are happy for the moment, and contended, but that happiness doesn't last long. So, understand that your happiness should not be defined upon success or fulfilments. When you look upon the good sides of your life's past or present, be happy in it. If you believe in your future good, be happy in it. Ultimate happiness is not materialistic or earthly, but spiritualistic and heavenly. It is when our spirit and soul immerses into our creator, that we enjoy the ultimate form of happiness, despite of all that has happened in your life - good or bad.

Happiness is an emotion, fleeting and meaningless. It should be seen as an orgasm - great when it happens but nothing worth living for. What you are actually looking for is meaning. Meaning provides you with a contentment that nothing else will and the best part is that contentment will stay with you through life's sufferings. Meaning is the ultimate state of mind. There are several paths to meaning.

Religion has been the most primary path since the dawn of mankind. In the last 150 years, as our culture has become more and more based solely on materialism, religion has largely faded to the fringes so the masses have turned to other ways to look for Meaning in whatever they thought was greater than themselves, be it science, politics, group affiliations, etc. This is the crux of the problem with our current political polarization. To be true the exact answer is only known to you. Its just that you need to find it out.

I can suggest you few things to catch what’s actually going wrong which is leading you to the unhappiness and non-positiveness. Being not happy may be the reason for non accomplishment of expectations, goals. And being not positive may be the fear of failure, overthinking & lack of confident. I would suggest you to choose a quiet place and sit there for a while thinking what exactly is that stopping me from being myself. You might end up with no answer for the first time. Try continuously taking out time for yourself and occupy a quiet place and starting talking to yourself. Ask yourself a question. When you find out the obstacle, you’ll get your answer automatically. You can also follow the below mentions:

Start Affirmation : Talk to yourself in a positive way all the time. For example tell yourself - “I’m confident today”, “I’m so happy today”, “I’m the best”, “I’m born to win”. Positive Environment : Surround yourself with the positive people as much as you can. Don’t initiate communication with the negative ones and avoid them as much as you can. Become health conscious : Start doing aerobic or physical exercise. Eat healthy food and consume only healthy drinks. Decide to remain positive all the time and never leave that attitude, Cheers!