Stay Calm, No Matter What
This weekend, I sat down and pulled together everything I know about staying calm when your body, mind, heart and/or soul is screaming at you.
These are not theoretical steps I read in a book. These are proven techniques I have used repeatedly, through both the stress of daily life a well as actual tragedies:
As you can see, I use the word "peace" to remind me of the five steps.
Pause and take control of your breathing: when stressed or afraid, your breathing shifts. You take shallow and/or rapid breaths. By pausing, you can become aware of your breathing and then exert conscious control to change it. There are a number of proven techniques for doing this, but I especially like the simplest of all: I simply count the length of my inhales and exhales, knowing that the higher the number, the more my body has relaxed. I observe without effort, and every time I do this, my breaths get longer and deeper.
Empty your mind of all thoughts. I now meditate 20 minutes at a time, at least once a day and sometimes twice. My only goal is to stop thinking while still awake. I try to maintain a playful attitude, without judgment or effort.
Accept and process your emotions. Burying emotions doesn't work. You can't hide from your feelings without having them manifest in not so pleasant ways. So, once you are calmer and your mind has stopped churning, open your heart and welcome whatever comes up. Welcome whatever you feel.
Choose love over fear. This is the big one. It's the most important choice you will ever make. It takes great maturity to choose love even when things aren't going "your way". But it is a much better long-term strategy to move towards your passions than to run away from what you fear. I'll be writing more about this in the weeks ahead.
Engage with calm and balance. Go back to your daily life. Face your challenges. Avoid labeling events (or people) as "good" or "bad". Everyone has a story; try to learn their story. Be a loving, positive presence.
Most importantly, repeat this cycle each day.
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4 个月I agree!??
Associate Professor of Oral Biology and Pharmacology at Creighton University
4 个月Wonderful advice! Thanks so much!
Chief Copywriting Officer & CEO of CaringMessenger Copywriting/Christ-Centered/Upside-Down Eternal Lens Leadership
4 个月The chill factor is huge?? I love letter C best. Choose love over fear. Fear happens when you look around. You start comparing yourself with others, you go down a rabbit hole of self-pity, you forget what you are grateful for. When you choose love (God is love??)…it’s not that everything is instantly beautiful and perfect, but your perspective shifts. Hope arises. You start looking up ?? instead of around. You learn to live unselfishly. Others joy and wellbeing start to be more meaningful to you. Your self-limiting thoughts become quieter. You start “being” more instead of “doing” more. God’s presence in your life will give you peace ??? Choose peace. Say “no” to internal torment. Live free??????
Moved to the Amazon jungle to build a retreat centre.
4 个月Great acronym, Bruce. Very stoic. And ouf how much harm have the labels of 'good' and 'bad' done. I much prefer "optimal" and "suboptimal", since everything is contextual.
Enabling the Organizations to turn Vision to Meaningful Results Visionary Digital Transformation Leader | Supply Chain Innovation Catalyst | Business Growth Strategist | Digital Transformation Architect
4 个月What a great thoughts and advice Bruce. Small and intelligently written..I have gone through few tough situations in my life and going through currently as well, I can deeply understand and relate every single word what you said. The Word PEACE alone is very powerful but your explanation has made it extraordinary. Will wait for your write up Choose Love or fear...this is difficult....