STANDING IN OUR OWN WAY SUCKS. SO WHY DO WE DO IT?

Last week, we talked about that loud voice of self-doubt so many of us have and how to deal with it to at least make it a little quieter or just not believe what it says. (If you missed the live, you may want to check it out here.)

But the question remains, why are our brains such jerks who throw all this mean sh*t at us?

Short answer: It's their job.

More specifically, it's the job of our lizard brain, the oldest part of our brain that we literally share with lizards. Now, without being experts on lizards, I guess we all have a pretty good idea what's happening in those little brains: Fight? Flight? Freeze? Eat? Not eat? Be eaten? Something like that.

In a nutshell: It's all about survival. This part of our brain is responsible for making us survive, not thrive. And with this important job assigned to it, it can override anything else going on in our way more complicated minds.

Leaving our comfort zone gets the equivalent of the response you trigger when you leave a bar through the emergency exit. (If you've never done that, believe me, it's loud.) Now, as every seasoned barkeeper or business owner will tell you, 99 out of 100 times when they hear that alarm go off, it's just someone who had too much to drink stepping out to the back door. They know that and still they don't take the alarm off, because one in 100 times there may be an emergency, maybe a fire in the back of the establishment and people have a really good reason to trigger this alarm. For that one time when it's really serious, they need to deal with the 99 false alarms.

That's about how you can think of our lizard brain. Let's say you are alone in a city that you're not familiar with: you want that part of your brain to be active, right? Because you need to focus on steps behind you or anything else that may make you feel like there's potential danger. You want that alarm. It's our natural fear response and for the one time serious stuff is (or could be) going on, it's worth having it and dealing with the 99 false alarms.

Unfortunately, the same thing happens when you step outside of your comfort zone. That may be a 1-on-1 with your boss, or a room full of strangers at a networking meeting, or maybe a big presentation. Whatever it is for you that triggers your lizard brain to ring the alarm, let's be honest: It's uncomfortable for sure, but it's not dangerous to your life. (Yes, you could faint, but that's a far cry from being eaten. Ask our lizard friend! Oh wait, it's no longer with us...)

So this is what's going on, and why our brains can be such jerks –?because it's their job and they are protecting us from actual danger.

But we have a lot more brain capacity than that –?and we can use those parts to decide that we can be uncomfortable, we can grow our comfort zone, we can do the thing (whatever it is for you). In other words, we can actively choose to get out of our own way.

It's a decision. Are you ready to take it?

If you want to learn about how to activate the positive side, join my next?LinkedIn event?on?“Where to take confidence from”?on Thursday, April 28 at 6pm CEST / noon EST / 9am PST.?