Standing 8

You’re lying in the middle of the street. You’re wondering what the Hell just happened? You’ve been hit my friend. You’re now in the middle of a standing 8 count. For those unfamiliar with a standing 8 count, it’s when a boxer gets knocked down, and the referee counts to 8 to see if the boxer who was knocked down, can get back up. Life has punched us all in the face at one point or another. What should you do, when you’re in the middle of your standing 8?

After spending 20 years as a crisis counselor, I have seen far too many people experience a standing 8. But do you know what the difference is in those who got counted out, verses those who got up? Those who got up immediately, more often than not, got knocked right back down. Those who took the full 8 count before standing up, seemed a little better equipped to keep going. Why? Because they used what was available to better position themselves.

Those who get knocked down and jump right back up, didn’t pause and reevaluate. Those that got knocked down, paused and refocused, were more alert and made a quick adjustment. When you’re in the middle of your standing 8, take a minute to process. Grab a moments rest. The fight will continue when you get up. Don’t be in such a rush to get hit in the face again.

Whatever is the cause of your standing 8, be it a relationship, job, finances or family, get clear on your next move. Take some time to heal. Learn a new skill. Or, in some cases, simply walk away from the fight. Case in point: A women came to me and said that she couldn’t leave her boyfriend because her family really liked him. She explained that he was a different man in front of her family, and she didn’t want to let them down. It’s okay to let them down. And let them down hard. She was feeling abused emotionally, and unsupported by her family. When I asked her how long she had been feeling this way, she said 3 years. That was not a standing 8. That was a knock out, so get out.

The point that I am trying to make is this. It takes great strength to heal. Do the work, and use the 8 to your advantage. Because rushing back into the 8, often leads to another 8.