The Stages of Grief: Understanding Your Journey Through Loss

Have you ever found yourself feeling lost in the waves of grief, unsure of what to expect or how to move forward?

Do emotions come in unpredictable waves, one moment you’re numb, the next overcome with sadness or anger?

Grief is a deeply personal journey, yet many find comfort in understanding the common stages that accompany it. While there is no right or wrong way to grieve, recognizing these stages can help you navigate loss with greater self-compassion.

Understanding Grief as a Process

Grief is not a single emotion, it is a process of adjusting to life after loss. Psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross identified five stages that many people experience when grieving.

These stages do not follow a strict order, and not everyone goes through all of them. Some move quickly through one stage, linger in another, or revisit certain emotions over time.

Each person’s grief is unique, but understanding these stages can provide a sense of reassurance, what you are feeling is natural, and you are not alone.

Denial: This can't be real.

The first reaction to loss is often shock or disbelief. Life as you knew it has changed, and the mind may struggle to accept this new reality. Denial serves as a protective mechanism, softening the impact of overwhelming emotions. It can look like avoidance, numbness, or even carrying on as if nothing has changed. In time, as the reality of the loss settles in, denial begins to fade, making space for other emotions to emerge.

Anger: Why did this happen?

As the shock wears off, emotions may shift into anger. This anger can be directed at oneself, others, a higher power, or even the person who has passed. It may not always seem rational, but anger is a natural response to loss. Beneath it often lies deep pain, the frustration of helplessness, the unfairness of losing someone or something important. Allowing anger to surface in a healthy way, whether through journaling, talking to a trusted friend, or physical movement, can help release its hold.

Bargaining: If only things had been different...

In this stage, the mind searches for ways to undo or make sense of the loss. Thoughts like “What if I had done something differently?” or “If only I had more time” are common. Bargaining often reflects a desire for control in an uncontrollable situation. While it’s natural to revisit memories and wish for a different outcome, it’s important to recognize that grief is not about blame. Healing comes from learning to extend kindness to yourself, acknowledging that no amount of bargaining can change the past.

Depression: This hurts more than I imagined.

When the full weight of the loss sets in, sadness may feel overwhelming. This stage is often marked by deep sorrow, loneliness, or a sense of emptiness. It can be difficult to find motivation or joy in daily life. Unlike clinical depression, which may require medical support, grief-related depression is a normal part of healing.

Allowing yourself to feel and express sadness, rather than suppress it, is an important step in moving forward. Seeking support from loved ones, engaging in self-care, and allowing time to process emotions can ease this stage.

Acceptance: I am learning to live with this.

Acceptance does not mean forgetting or that the pain disappears completely. It means reaching a place where the loss is integrated into your life story. The sadness may remain, but it no longer consumes every moment. You begin to rebuild, finding ways to honor what was lost while also allowing yourself to experience life again. Acceptance brings a gentle shift, one where grief and love coexist, and healing becomes possible.

Moving Forward with Compassion

Grief is not a journey you must take alone. There is no timeline, no checklist for when you should feel "better." Some days will be harder than others, and that’s okay.

Healing does not mean forgetting, it means finding a way to carry love and loss together, with tenderness and resilience. If you are struggling with grief and need guidance, I am here to support you.

Through personalized coaching, we can navigate your emotions, find healing strategies that resonate with you, and help you rebuild with love and intention. You don’t have to go through this alone. reach out, and let’s take the next step together.

Candice Rizk