Spooky Stories Like the One About the Guy Who Didn't See Well at Night

Can you believe it's been over a year since Spooky Tales From the Glaucoma Clinic? Time flies when you're…something something global pandemic. Now, onto today's topic.

According to family lore,?I?always saw things in black and white when I was young. There were never any shades of gray. Right or?wrong, yes or no, there was or there wasn't. As I've gotten older, I've embraced the gray in some ways though I still prefer clear cut answers to the murky, unsettled in-between. Despite preferences, I'm writing to you today from that hazy, unclear place.

Back in November 2020, I found myself careening towards legal blindness. Since that time, I've stopped driving almost all together, phased out my beloved night runs, and generally tried to open myself to the idea that, sometimes, I'm just going to need help making things work.

Speaking of work, let's talk about that. Statistics vary a bit depending on your source but work is a problem for the blind and visually impaired. Roughly 70% are unemployed. Though I'm no expert, my understanding is that the Feds pay benefits to the blind through two social services programs: Social Security Disability Insurance and Supplemental Security Income.?Applicants may qualify for benefits if vision is no greater than 20/200 in the better eye or you have a visual field less than 20 degrees in your better eye for an anticipated time lasting longer than 12 months. While exceeding the threshold for legal blindness wouldn't have changed my driving, running, or work decisions, it would have meant that I'd have the paperwork necessary to qualify for disability should I no longer be able to perform my job with reasonable accommodations.?

For the last 12 months, my visual fields have remained relatively stable while my visual function seems to have decreased considerably. In many instances, I no longer recognize friends until they're right on top of me (hi, Ashley!). Nina instinctively reads the subtitles to me because she knows I can't anymore. Though I'm a little embarrassed to admit it (please don't tell them), I think I even confused my dogs the other day. The loss of visual function is frustrating enough but what gets me even more is the fact that it's not accurately reflected in my clinical examination.?

While the cause of this phenomenon might be interesting, I haven't really dug in as I guess it doesn't matter much in the end. Still, I wish there were a clear explanation I could point to when telling my doc about what I'm experiencing. Until then, greetings from the murky, unsettled in-between.

Originally published at https://richiekahn.wordpress.com

#glaucomaniac