Speak Better Through the Power of Humbling Moments

I have a strange affliction.

I stick my head in the mouths of lions. And sometimes I get it bitten off.

When I was in high school, I intentionally engaged a contentious and famously pugnacious and opinionated professional radio talk show host in a public debate that I had no chance of winning. In front of 250 people.

And I got ripped to shreds. Publicly humiliated.?

It was brutal. I was so embarrassed, I had to leave school right after the debacle to go home and soak in my mortification.?

Why did it happen??

I was a bit of a brash kid. Cocky. But I didn’t think, or otherwise I would have realized I was in over my head.

CAREERS DAY

The speaker I took on was the star host of a daily morning talk show on my favorite radio station.?

He had been invited to my school on Careers Day to speak in an assembly about his job and take audience questions afterward.?

When I took the mic during the Q&A, I complained about how I thought his station had become increasingly sensationalistic, especially in its news format.?

I should have realized it was the wrong question for that room.?

I was setting myself up to get hammered by an authoritative figure with a microphone, in front of his fans.

And did I get it. He went after me as if I had bitten him in the face.?

By the time he was done taking me down, I was a pile of smoldering wreckage.?

The worst part was hearing the cheers his final words elicited from the crowd, in front of my favorite teachers and friends:

“... and if you don’t like what you’re hearing, turn the damn thing off.”

PAINFUL LESSON

As I slinked away, humiliated, the sound of the crowd gleefully endorsing my ridicule ringing in my ears, one student I knew commented snarkily to me, “Gee, Barris, I thought you were?smart.”?

At any rate, I wanted to die.?

I gathered my things and left the building, too embarrassed to remain at the scene of my public skewering.?

The lesson here: public speaking must be done mindfully. The costs of not using words with care - and of not thinking things through beforehand, where possible - can be enormous.?

Especially in business, where speaking is such an integral part of how things are done.

Now, I know I was just a 17-year-old kid when this disaster happened to me. But age isn’t an excuse.

Plenty of adults in enormously responsible and lofty roles say ill-advised things that get them into hot water and cost them lots of personal pain.?

Here's one of the most relevant examples I can think of.

THE RATNERS SAGA

In 1991, Gerald Ratner, CEO of the Ratners Group, a British jewelry store chain holding company, had horrified the staid old jewelry industry by doing something unthinkable with his family's "Ratners" chain.

He'd plastered garish orange and red posters all over the windows of his shops that screamed: “LAST CHANCE — SALE SALE SALE: HALF PRICE!”?He also slapped price tags on every item in his windows.

This simply was not done.

Jewelry was an expensive and exclusive luxury item. Business, the prevailing sentiment went, was to be conducted quietly, with dignity.?

But Gerald's advertising resonated with the working class he was targeting. It seemed to say: "Yes! Even ordinary folks like you can buy earrings, bracelets and rings at rock-bottom prices!"?

The average Ratners item sold for the equivalent of just US$25 and for as little as US$1.25. By contrast, traditional jewelers' items cost about US$950, on average, in today's currency.

Gerald's advertising resonated with the working class he was targeting. It seemed to say: 'Yes! Even ordinary folks like you can buy earrings, bracelets and rings at rock-bottom prices!'

BOOMING EXPANSION

The public's wild adoration of Ratners' campaign helped the chain explode in size. In 1990, it surged from 120 stores to more than 2,000 as it captured 50 percent of the British jewelry market and generated annual sales of US$1.5 billion.?

Then the fateful moment came.

In 1991, Gerald's fantastic success earned him an invitation to speak at the annual conference of the Institute of Directors, a prestigious gathering of company directors, senior business leaders and entrepreneurs.

The group's annual conferences were considered so influential that attendees typically included prime ministers and members of the British royal family. The guest speakers' talks were seen as a high point of the event and reported on by the media.

The idea of speaking in front of thousands of people in London’s famous old Royal Albert Hall awed Gerald.

And understandably so.

He'd learned the jewelry business the hard way - by sweeping the floors of his father's jewelry shop when he was 16. He'd never delivered a speech before a high-profile gathering like this before.

GERALD'S FOLLY

Eager to make a good impression, he sought out a speaking consultant's advice on how to make his talk at the iconic conference a huge hit.

The answer: “Put in a joke. People like your jokes.”?

And so Gerald did that. And it was his utterance of two ill-chosen quips that spelled his downfall and ultimately helped destroy much of what he had spent years building.??

He was at the conference, discussing the event’s themes of “quality, choice, and prosperity,” when he said these words in jest:

“Ratners doesn’t represent prosperity — and come to think of it, it has very little to do with quality as well.”??

He continued:?

“We do cut-glass sherry decanters complete with six glasses on a silver-plated tray that your butler can serve you drinks on, all for ￡4.95 (the equivalent of about US$6.19).

“People say, ‘How can you sell this for such a low price?’ I say, because it’s total crap.”?

Yes, that’s what Gerald said.?

ROAD TO DISASTER

If you look at the YouTube video of him delivering this speech, you can imagine how it must have gratified him to hear his remarks inspire a wave of warm applause.?

Maybe he was feeling a bit emboldened by this flush of success, because you can hear his confidence level rising as he then adds:?

“We even sell a pair of [gold] earrings for under ￡1 (US$1.25). Some people say, ‘That’s cheaper than a prawn sandwich!’…I have to say, the sandwich will probably last longer than the earrings.”

His remarks triggered a tsunami of negative reaction.

The newspaper headlines the next day screamed: “JEWELRY CEO CALLS HIS OWN PRODUCTS ‘CRAP.’”?

The Sunday Times dubbed him “Gerald Crapner” - a nickname that stuck and helped fuel disgust among Ratners' once-loyal customers and fed disaffection for the company among investors.

STOCK PLUNGE

Within a few days of the speech, Ratners Group's stock plunged by ￡500 million (equal to roughly US$1.8 billion today). Within 10 months, the company’s shares lost 80 percent of their value.?

Customers now were boycotting the brand.?

As the company hemorrhaged millions of dollars in sales, Ratners had to close hundreds of stores and laid off a large chunk of its 25,000-person workforce.

In November 1992, Gerald was fired as CEO of Ratners Group.?

Again, the lesson here: failing to think about how your words are going to affect the audience is asking for trouble.

Gerald’s folly wasn’t merely delivering an inappropriate speech – it was failing to consider how his words would be interpreted by the press and transmitted to a larger audience beyond the room.

His saga has implications today for users of social media.?

NAVIGATING TWITTER

Numerous cases exist of executives who have put out their thoughts to audiences on Twitter or other social networks - only to suffer the repercussions when their words were poorly received.

But mistakes like this can be prevented, if you do the following:?

• Develop your ability to read the room. Consider the demographics of the crowd, the reason they are there, your speech purpose, related developments in the industry, news cycle or neighborhood.
• Put yourself in the audience's shoes. As you craft the talk, see yourself as a member of the audience, feeling and thinking like them as you speak.
• Be mindful of the impact your words could have in the broader universe of social media - or in traditional media - if you speak negatively about anything, be it a product, concept or person. It's always important to speak directly and honestly, but be mindful that there is a time and a place for a softer approach in communications, depending on your business mission.?
• Understand that the people in your audience may not be as smart as you think, or as they think. Provide contextual information that fills in the big picture. Be clear about why they must pay attention to your words. Research shows that 70 percent of project failure is due to miscommunication.
• Learn to speak confidently – it’s unacceptable to blame miscommunication on nerves. Boil down what you want to say in your mind to essential points or “key words”. Then speak as extemporaneously to those points as possible.

LIFE LESSONS

Yes, learning the hard way through one’s blunders has its points. You learn lessons you never forget.?

Just ask Gerald Ratner – he’s bounced back and is doing well once again.?

And I’m definitely a smarter and more effective speaker now, partly thanks to my radio adversary giving me a public thrashing when I was in high school.?

But in business or in life, it makes sense to choose your words wisely.

In the long run, it's smarter and healthier to spend as much time as possible out of the mouths of lions.

Here's a quick framework for inspiring audiences to act. Click on the link under my LinkedIn profile headshot that says, "Watch the Free Training Video!" It will show you what you must do to make your presentation so inspiring that the audience will have no choice but to follow your call to action.

DID YOU MISS THESE GREAT POSTS THIS WEEK?

'Speakers Who Think Differently, With Michael Barris' Continues

My seventh guest was Jon Phillips, Chief Executive Officer at PhillComm Global. He's a PR/marcom senior executive specializing in emerging/hyper-growth industries and launches.

If you missed the original LinkedIn live show, click?here ?for the recording.?

Guest number 8 will be Wyjuana Montgomery. She is a consultant for those wanting to write their first book and helps girls in grades 6 through 12 with her life skills and social emotional learning program.

Steve Jobs Once Told Me I’d Screwed Up

Yes, THAT Steve Jobs.

It happened when I was a writer for the Dow Jones/Wall Street Journal Rewrite Desk.

What happened and how did I handle it? Check out the post below for the full story.

How to Communicate with a Higher-up Who Just Doesn't Get the Point You’re Making

It’s frustrating. Exasperating. And it makes no sense to you because you see the issue so clearly.

But you’re afraid of challenging this higher-up – not only because you want to keep your job, but because you want to get promoted.

If you want to navigate this situation and pave your way to a promotion and success, learn more in the full post below:

Three Quick Ways to Build Your Ability to Project Strength and Confidence:

1. Practice speaking at TWICE your normal speed.

2. Boost your assertiveness by practicing speaking in a loud voice.

3. Look like you belong on stage.

For details, check out the post below:

MICHAEL'S MOTIVATING MISSIVE

Despite its reputation, positive thinking isn't all that powerful.

Not without a positive ACTION to accompany it.

So if self-doubt holds you back from taking a self-improvement program, the cure isn't simply to embrace a positive mindset.

It's to act.

THANKS FOR SPENDING TIME READING THIS NEWSLETTER! LET ME KNOW HOW YOU LIKED IT.

SEE YOU SOON ... UNLEASH THE POWER OF YOUR VOICE!

And remember, as the US business consultant and author Price Pritchett says: "If you must doubt something, doubt your limits."

POSTSCRIPT ...

Join me on Tuesday at 2 pm ET on LinkedIn Live for the next broadcast of "Speakers Who Think Differently." These shows will introduce you to a variety of professionals who will talk about their body of work and how they use their public speaking skills to get their unconventional messages across. You'll learn lots of useful tips you can put back into your business, be it in speaking in meetings, webinars, media interviews, conferences or impromptu situations.

That's a wrap!

#publicspeaking ?#personaldevelopment ?#speakerswhothinkdifferently ? #talentdevelopment ?#business