Speaking of public speaking.

I didn’t speak in public until I was 25.?

I was shy. The thought of standing up in front of people to talk, with all eyes on me, was a nightmare. It churned my stomach, made my heart pound, and made my palms clammy.?

“According to most studies, people’s number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you’re better off in the casket than delivering the eulogy.” — Jerry Seinfeld

My fear of public speaking was so stark that I plotted a superb, convoluted, make-Houdini-proud path through my high-school and college curriculum that had me escaping every class that had a public-speaking requirement. Yours truly would rather be in the casket than deliver the eulogy.?

Then, something happened with the first company that I started at 26.?

I forgot to be afraid.?

“The way you overcome shyness is to become so wrapped up in something that you forget to be afraid.” — Lady Bird?Johnson

I had fallen in love with my work.

And, I forgot to be afraid for the first time in my life.?

Today, I do presentations for a living. I am on a high every time I speak in public. I leave it all out there when I give a talk, any talk. I am exhilarated when I start speaking, and I am tingling with excitement when I stop. It blows my mind that I get to stand up and gush about something that I love, and that people are actually willing to listen.?

Who could pass that up??

Here’s what I’ve learned over the years of dreading, and then enjoying, public speaking.?

Your audience matters. Above?all.

Think of your presentation as a conversation between you and one other person. Don’t think about the room. Think only about getting your point across to one person, and speak to that person throughout your presentation. When you speak directly to a single human being, the power of your voice and your convictions will show in every word. Stand with your back to the slides, and face the audience. You’re talking to the audience, not to the slides.

“Designing a presentation without an audience in mind is like writing a love letter and addressing it: To Whom It May Concern.” — Ken Haemer

Stories matter.

It’s important to tell the story of the talk, before giving the talk. Stories have a power unto themselves. Stories are memorable. Stories are real. Stories are personal. Stories imbibe your personality. When you open your talk with a story, you already communicate to your audience that your talk is deeply personal. You’re not there to phone it in. You’re not there to sell anyone on anything. You’re there because you have an emotional connection to what you are saying. Wear your heart on your sleeve when you give a talk.

“You can speak well if your tongue can deliver the message of your heart.” — John Ford

Pauses matter.

It’s important to know when to pause and when not to pause. It’s important to know when to pause for effect, when to pause for an idea to sink in, when to pause because of a dramatic unveil, when to pause to provide a side comment. Pauses matter because the human mind reads into pauses. The human mind knows that something is coming, something interesting, something startling, something nuanced, something impressive, something that matters. The human mind is conditioned to pauses.

“The most precious things in speech are the pauses.” — Sir Ralph Richardson

Preparation matters.

You need to know every twist and turn of your presentation. You need to know how to make your point even if you have only 5 minutes left. You need to know which parts of your presentation are dramatic, and which ones are merely informational. You need to know the feeling you want to evoke on every slide of your talk. Once you’re ready and once you’re prepared, you don’t need to look at anything and your words will be spontaneous and natural.

“It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.” — Mark Twain

Speed matters.

Speed conveys energy. It matters to speak at the speed that your audience can take in. Don’t underestimate your audience. Don’t assume that you know the answers. Every talk I’ve given, the audience knew more than me, and they still gave me the benefit of the doubt and heard me out. Speed gives momentum to the talk. Speed is exhilarating. Speed is energy in words, and speed provides a sense of getting on a train and going somewhere.

“The energy level of the audience is the same as the speaker’s. For better…or for worse.” — Andras Baneth

Content matters.

Every slide of your presentation has a purpose. Every slide has a tone. Some slides entertain, some educate, some inspire, some carry a punch-line. Know the one purpose of each slide, know how you want the audience to feel on that slide, know the tone you want to use, and keep it short. No slide should have more than three points it’s trying to make. And, three is too many.?

The more text you put on a slide, the more you’re going to lose your audience. Images get burned in the brain. Text doesn’t. A single, powerful image does more good for your message than multiple, scattershot images.

“The more strikingly visual your presentation is, the more people will remember it. And more importantly, they will remember you.” — Paul Arden

Humor matters.

Laugh often. Laughter is an act of human connection, it’s an act of irrepressible joy. When people laugh together, they are united in that shared human moment. They all feel the same thing, they go through the same emotion, and that communal spirit can lift you, can give you goosebumps. Laugh out of love for the material you are talking about. Laugh because you’re alive and you’re given a priceless opportunity to be heard. Laugh out of love for your audience, out of that communal feeling of being one with the audience in that moment of time. Laugh at the beauty of the opportunity you’ve been handed. Laugh out of the pure joy of the moment, of being able to tell your story, and discovering that others want to hear it.

Gratitude matters.

Thank your audience. They are giving you 15–30-60 minutes of their life that they will never get back, and they chose to spend those minutes on you. They could be doing a million other things instead of listening to you. They chose you instead. And whether or not they applaud, whether or not they think you are awesome, whether or not your message landed, whether or not they ask questions, thank them. It is an absolute privilege to be granted an audience and to know that someone chose to spend precious minutes of their life, minutes they won’t get back,?… listening to you.

“There are three things to aim at in public speaking: first, to get into your subject, then to get your subject into yourself, and lastly, to get your subject into the heart of your audience.” — Alexander Gregg