Sounding the Alarm: Boys and Suicide (Op-Ed)

By Calvin T. Mann

When I first learned about the alarming rise in the rate of youth suicide across the country, I was shocked. I understood suicide to be an issue of adults and older teens, not children as young as 5.

“The suicide death rate among Black youth has been found to be increasing faster than that of any other racial/ethnic group,” according to" Ring the Alarm: The Crisis of Black Youth Suicide in America," a recent Congressional Black Caucus emergency task force report. “In youth ages 10 to 19 years, suicide is the second leading cause of death, and in 2017, over 3,000 youth died by suicide in this age group. Black youth under 13 years are twice as likely to die by suicide and when comparing by sex, Black males, 5 to 11 years, are more likely to die by suicide compared to their White peers.”

What would make a 5-year-old commit suicide? While child suicide is not fully understood and there is more research needed, The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests suicide may be related to children’s exposure to violence and trauma but that does not explain every case. Other factors may include mental illness, bullying at school, physical abuse, neglect, gender confusion, ADHD, reactions to medicines, feelings of hopelessness and/or depression. A 5-year-old’s developmental milestones show that social and emotional communication skills are sufficient to making decisions. At 5, boys want to please friends, want to be liked, are more likely to agree with rules, can tell what is real or make believe, speak clearly, and know about things used every day.  

"Suicide deaths and behaviors are rising in Black children and teens in ways that we have not seen before,” writes Dr. Michael A. Lindsey, Executive Director of the NYU McSilver Institute for Poverty Policy and Research, an advisor to the federal task force. One thing the experts agree on: Children need adults who will listen, believe in them, protect them, and help them develop resilience and healthy responses to stress and adversity. Too many children don’t have this at home. For some, the family home isn’t a safe space. School was their haven and that was taken away from them during pandemic-related remote teaching. These are all stressful elements for children and youth. For those who were already struggling with defining their future and the challenges of mental health, these new stressors can be overwhelming. It’s imperative that we reach our children before it’s too late.

I couldn’t shake the thought that no one in our community had sounded the alarm, that no one that we knew was working in suicide prevention for Black boys in this age group. Age-appropriate intervention and prevention programs are needed, especially male mentorship for elementary school-aged boys. 

Encourage Me I’m Young Inc. (EMIY) mentoring programs have served over 16,000 youth, helping them build self-confidence and perseverance. The EMIY Way is a Theory of Change Model developed as a strategy of prevention and intervention activities in the lives of youth. 

That’s why I champion the EMIY Smash Suicide strategy. I decided that EMIY would take leadership in sounding the alarm about suicide and sharing our mentoring program as a prevention model. We are fighting for the lives of boys through our Smash Suicide campaign and EMIY Future Leaders Program, which has been validated as an evidence-based program by the University of Michigan.

Each EMIY Future Leader has a story of resilience in the face of doubt. Boys are often labeled as incorrigible, hyperactive, lazy, mentally and/or emotionally impaired, and are often abandoned by the educational, parental, and/or social process. Many of our EMIY Future Leaders enter the program under these labels, and emerge from our 14-week mentoring program as leaders in the making.

There was a 10-year-old child who entered the program unable to tie his own shoes and fearful of experiencing new challenges and being separated from his mother. With help from EMIY mentors, he established a routine, worked on coordination and exercise, and learned to be part of a team. Three years later, he is a peer leader at home, in school and community. He demonstrates perseverance and confidence and works more independently.

One of the reasons why the EMIY Way is so effective is because we use fathers as mentors. A father’s impact on the lives of boys is a key ingredient to their identity and self-confidence. We believe healthy fatherhood is a viable solution in developing children’s well-being and in suicide prevention.

The literature on fatherhood often cites these statistics: Sixty-three percent of youth suicides are from fatherless homes (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services/U.S. Census) – that is five times the average. Eighty-five percent of all children who show behavior disorders come from fatherless homes – 20 times the average (U.S. Centers for Disease Control). 

While the research demonstrates the direct impact of healthy fatherhood as a needed solution, American society has yet to give it real support. The Responsible Fatherhood research literature generally supports the claim that a loving and nurturing father improves outcomes for children, families, and communities. Children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, exhibit empathy and pro-social behavior, and avoid high-risk behaviors such as drug use, truancy, and criminal activity, compared to children who have uninvolved fathers. 

There is more to do. Champions, contributors, and change agents need to raise awareness about the youth suicide crisis and support the solutions that matter. Champions can support research, awareness campaigns, and suicide prevention programs for Black children. Last year, U.S. Senator Cory Booker (D-NJ), U.S. Rep. Bonnie Watson Coleman (D-NJ), and other members of the Congressional Black Caucus sponsored legislation to address suicide and mental health issues for youth, especially children of color. (The House approved it, but the Republican-led Senate did not.) Also, here in Southeastern Michigan, corporations can invest in their future workforce by supporting EMIY’s mentoring programs and the EMIY Empowerment Center. 

Gov. Gretchen Whitmer recently signed a law requiring Michigan middle and high schools to print suicide prevention hotlines on the back of their school ID cards. We know that the message of suicide prevention must extend even closer to home, in schools and the community. Respect is a key element in prevention. Our EMIY National Respect Day and its subsequent messaging are essential tools for building respect among youth that extend from school into the community. This is a state-recognized movement that schools, PTAs, student leadership groups, and community leaders can stand behind.

Parents can reach out to their county mental health authority for additional support for family counseling and tools. The Detroit-Wayne Integrated Health Network 24-hour helpline can be reached at 800-241-4949. EMIY’s national partner, The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, provides 24-hour crisis prevention support at 800-273-8255. Our website EMIYworld.com provides free access to parents and community to download the EMIY WAY, a prevention and intervention strategy that supports our work with using encouragement to guide boys ages 3 to 14.  

Volunteers are needed. Fathers are trained in the EMIY WAY through our EMIY Mentor Academy in a three-part process, where we engage, empower and encourage them. Successful mentors are placed in our programs and continue in seeding the lives of boys in EMIY-led prevention and intervention activities. We encourage fathers to reach out directly to EMIY at 313-638-3649 for more information.

CALVIN T. MANN, National Encourager, is President and Founder of Good Fathers Only and EMIY Inc. He is a BMe Community Vanguard Fellow. Visit the website at www.EMIYworld.com or email [email protected]. #SuicidePrevention

Thank you,

Calvin T. Mann

EMIY Inc.

313-638-3649