Sometimes We Miss our Mark, but the Lesson is in the Process

Before Thanksgiving break, my eldest son surprised me. After years of avoiding organized sports like it was his job, he decided to try out for the high school basketball team. As someone who is frequently on or around basketball courts, I’m constantly amazed by the strength and sheer size of players. Teens today are built like Zion Williamson and quicker than John Wall (before the ACL injuries).

Leading up to tryouts, I was hopeful that my son’s discipline as a self-taught athlete who plays pick up games six to seven days a week at our community recreation center would count for something.?

It did, just not what I expected.??

Despite his best efforts, things didn’t go as planned. As he approached my car after the final tryouts, he calmly stated, "I didn’t make the team. The coach said I seemed nervous taking shots and advised me to get as much experience as possible playing games.” I slightly hesitated before asking, “Well, did you feel nervous taking shots tonight?” He replied, “Yes.” He went on to add that he wants to get serious about building his leg strength, play more games, and here’s the kicker - try out again next year.?

This was music to my ears because not only did he take disappointment better than I anticipated, but the constructive feedback resonated, he offered up his own helpful adjustment, and returned to the court the next day as regularly scheduled.???

Not achieving your desired goal temporarily causes pause and pain. But, if you commit to the process, beautiful lessons appear along with the ability to approach challenges with newfound clarity. My challenges and hiccups in life and business have ranged from minute or accidental to epic and astronomical. There’s not enough time to recount them here, but one thing holds true -? every setback highlights how to pivot and course correct by applying innovative approaches, which wouldn’t have revealed themselves without trying first.

Here are four business lessons I shared with my son about setbacks:?

1. Your systems and processes will save you! Business is business. Remember, it’s not personal. Things can go left at any moment. Ensure you have the basics and fundamentals in place, including contracts, agreements, and invoices and create systems, strategic plans and processes to remove any apprehension and keep you on track. This applies to anything and everything.?
2. Remember, you’re only in competition with yourself - Reframe a setback as an opportunity to challenge yourself to overcome it next time. Don’t worry about what someone else is doing. Improve YOUR personal best, whatever that is. Focusing on others will only distract you in your pursuit.
3. Find your tribe who will support you through all trials and tribulations - This is a special group of people who are so uniquely qualified, loving and fearless that no trial or tribulation is too great. They know what every eyebrow raise, voice inflection change or sigh signifies, and will swoop in at the ready. All you have to do is call. Your tribe will also hold you accountable when tough love is required.? Everyone needs a tribe. Mine is tested and approved.
4. Remember to laugh and find the silver lining? - Once the dust settles or even in the midst of challenges, look for the silver lining. If you’re still breathing and no one has died, you will be okay. The universe has a sense of humor and if you’re looking for it, you can find laughter in the best and worst of times.?

What is one lesson you learned recently when you missed your mark or goal??

Finally, we’re always drawing connections between the arts, life, and business, and the lyrics to “Grateful” by DJ Khaled ft Vory always put things in perspective.?

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Jacqueline Lara is the Founder of Mpact PR. As a multidisciplinary creative, storyteller and writer, Jacqueline explores connections between the arts, life and business to create a more productive and meaningful life.?

Mpact PR offers cutting-edge communications strategy, training, and media relations services to high-impact social justice organizations, creative organizations, and individuals.