Sometimes losing is still winning.

I hadn't planned to compete in the International Speech Contest.

Tuesday, January 7th - I woke up and drove to Kafiex Roasters - Coffee Lab in downtown Vancouver, WA for my early morning mastermind group, Goal Getters Network. It’s a networking group I started as a support group for high achievers.

One of our guests that day was Patrick Locke, a Distinguished Toastmaster. He asked me if I would compete in the International Speech contest the next morning as they needed another contestant at my Toastmasters club #3091 Professionally Speaking. I told him that I didn't have a prepared speech and he suggested I just throw one together. I agreed, thinking, 'Why not? It was just one speech, not too much of a commitment.' 

Wednesday, January 8th - I had been knee deep in a lot of recent research about my family history for the purpose of helping my 11 year old son, Avery, with one of his 5th grade assignments. He was tasked with creating a family tree and he did so using LEGOs.

I had been spending weeks climbing several generations up our family tree by interviewing a few of my relatives and investigating leads and documents on Ancestry.com. It was the morning of the contest and I was driving my Toastmasters meeting while speaking with my father on the phone. He told me a riveting story about an encounter my Grandpa Lee had in one of his many missions during WWII, and I felt compelled to add that story to my speech at the very last minute. 

I spoke about some of the trials of three of my ancestors. I shared what I thought were touching stories about my Great Grandma Fannie Sheweloff, and her son, my Grandpa Lee, both of whom are on my mothers’ side of the family tree. I also shared about my Great Grandfather Bernard Schwartz who is on my father's side. Both great grandparents had fled their oppressive home countries to come across the ocean to America over 100 years ago with next to nothing to their names. I passed around the prayer book that was one of my Great Grandmother’s only possessions when she left her homeland.

I also shared a story about my Grandfather in WWII and I started to tear up mid-speech because he meant a lot to me. I also passed around an old framed photograph of my Grandfather’s US Air Force Unit. The yellowed photo of these brave young pilots, gunners and bombardiers was an impactful visual aid. My Grandfather Leon Sheweloff (pictured bottom right) was clearly proud of his squadron!

I’d say my first speech was a success, and I came in 2nd place...out of two contestants.

The first place winner, Jeff Carr wasn’t able to commit due to his schedule as a Pastor, and so I went on from the club level to the Area level contest.

Saturday, February 22nd - My younger son, WyLee, came with me to check out my speech at the Area level of the International Speech contest. On the drive there, he sweetly expressed that he didn’t want me to win because he didn’t want me to leave the country. I said not to worry, just to take things as they come. If I did win and we flew to Paris, it'd be quite a memorable family vacation. That seemed to calm his nerves.

This time I arrived feeling ready, rehearsed and well prepared! I gave my speech on the subject of loyalty, and shared the funny story of my proposal to my wife, and a story about a client whose loyalty I earned after she lost her home in a tornado and I was able to pull together $2,000.00 to help her and her baby daughter to get back on their feet while they were waiting for FEMA. I shared my proven loyalty earning mindset.

My second speech was a success, and I came in 2nd place again...out of two contestants, again.

My son was impressed and felt I should have won, but I explained that the other speaker was more enthusiastic than I was, so she won fair and square. Second place still got to move on to the Division level contest.

Saturday, April 18th - Since the last speech contest, the world had completely changed due to the Coronavirus Pandemic. People everywhere were sheltering in place, and public gatherings were shut down. Toastmasters meetings and contests had gone 100% digital.

I shared a speech about one of my personal heroes, my Grandpa Lee. I talked about several traits of his that I look up to; creativity, self-sacrifice and compassion. I told brief but impactful personal stories that exemplified each positive quality. I spoke about his gifts that he had crafted out of wood, and what they meant to me as an example of creativity. I shared about when he fell and broke his hip but still let my Grandmother sleep in as an example of self-sacrifice. I told the story that my father told me about when my Grandfather was a Gunner in a B-17 during WWII, and he came face to face with an enemy but he just couldn't shoot as an example of his compassion. I ended with a call to action to be heroes during these troubling times.   

My third speech was a great success! I came in 1st place out of six talented contestants.

Now things were getting real! Patrick Locke, Marv Serhan and Bob Hall, all three Distinguished Toastmasters, reached out to me individually to provide an incredible level of support. Apparently, I was the first member of Professionally Speaking to ever make it that far in the International Speech contest. They reached out and rallied the other Toastmasters groups in my area, and arranged for me to perform my speech on a circuit. 

I lost track of all the meetings I spoke at and received evaluations from, but each time I shared my speech I received amazing feedback from one or multiple evaluators. I practiced daily and tried to apply the recommended improvements in my many rehearsals. I printed out an evaluation that was emailed to me by Marv Serhan and this incredibly detailed analysis was a 12 page report! I felt like Rocky Balboa in a training montage, except I had many experienced coaches in my corner, not just one. I was developing my public speaking skills every single day.

Saturday May 16th - The District 7 contest was run amazingly well. We have all gotten really good at using Zoom video conferencing by now. The 7 other speakers were highly skilled, and I was genuinely impressed by several of the performances.

I undoubtedly gave my best version of my speech yet. I retitled the speech ‘Portrait of a Hero’ and showcased a painting that I had made of my Grandpa Lee when I was a teenager. I had made many revisions based upon all of the incredible feedback I received from the dozen or more evaluations I had received. I spent the most time strengthening the opening, found a great and applicable quote by Maya Angelou, smiled more and committed my speech to memory. Still, after all of that work it wasn’t perfect, but it was by far the best speech I’ve ever given!  

My fourth speech was my biggest success, yet this time I did not place.

How exactly was it a success then, you ask? 

Three simple reasons:

1. I believe I properly honored the memory of my beloved Grandpa Lee.
2. I transformed into a better public speaker over this last 5 months due to a great deal of hard work and an immense amount of support of my friends, family and fellow Toastmasters.
3. I made several new friends and connections along the way. 

Depending upon your attitude, sometimes losing is still winning.

When someone reaches out to you and asks you for help, as Patrick did with me, I urge you to say "Yes!", or "No problem" to their request, if you can. What often first seems like an inconvenient addition to your already busy schedule may surprisingly turn into an opportunity to experience the benefits of quantum growth in your life!