something I'm afraid people will find out about me

It's been two weeks since I've written to you, and I apologise! Admittedly, I've been enjoying life way too much in Vegas and LA (you may have been following along on Instagram)

"What is something you are afraid for people to find out about you?" -- this question has been on my mind the moment I came across it. And I'm finally ready to share my answer with you.

For years I've pride myself in being a hard worker, a hustler, an ambitious boss girl. I considered it my badge of honour that I earned more than a fresh grad pay in my first year of business straight out of graduation, that I was working with over 10 clients at one time, that I had goals upon goals I was chasing, that I was working 14 hours a day chasing those goals -- I wore these 'credentials' like a badge of honour.

As you can guess, when I had months that didn't give me x number of clients or x amount of money, I felt embarrassed. I couldn't bring myself to show up on social media because I was worried people would know... they would know that I'm not doing well in my business and I wasn't a good entrepreneur.

Today, I live my life moment by moment. I have my key focuses for this season of life, but I'm not chasing goals that sound like: I want x number of clients, or earn x amount of money. I take my mornings slow, read and write at my patio, go to the gym 4x a week, take 5 dance classes a week, indulge myself in having soulful conversations without looking at my watch, stare into space and allow ideas to visit me when they are ready. And all of this translates into creative and powerful coaching sessions with my clients. I've been truly... enjoying life.

But back to the question: "What is something you are afraid for people to find out about you?"

I'm afraid for people to find out that... I no longer feel the need to hustle for more clients or more money. The Asian parent voice that nags at the back of my mind constantly barks at me saying "If you don't hustle for more clients, people will lose respect for you" "What happen to the old ambitious rae? Did you give up on your dream?"

No. I did not give up on my dream. I simply let go of the dream my fears have created for me.

Today, I've created a dream that excites me. I dream of a life of creativity, wonder, freedom and exploration. One of deep gratitude and the expansiveness of grace. A life with full permission to experiment: to try new things and embark on unfamiliar paths without the expectation to excel in them.

So here are some truths about me:

I don't feel the NEED to sell to more clients. My NEED to sell used to come from a place of lack and fear. The number of clients I had and the $ digits I hit each month determine how worthy I felt as an entrepreneur. I've since let go of the chains these numbers had over me.

Now, I work with clients whom I genuinely connect with and know deep down are perfect for me. These are clients who have followed my work and the Own Your Voice philosophy. These are clients who usually get on the discovery call with me and tell me "Rae, I feel like it's the right season of my life to work with you, I want to own my voice." These are clients who naturally recommend me to their peers because their lives have changed since owning their voice. These are clients I LOVE selling to because I know they will gain infinite times more value than what they paid for.

I don't feel the NEED to create content. I used to guilt myself when I miss a day of not posting because I was afraid I would lose out on getting more clients. Today, I write when I feel like it. I write when I've something I really want to say. I write because it heals me and it liberates me. I write because I love the person I am when I am writing. I love how soft yet powerful I feel, I love how wisdom from the Universe flows through me and I realise that I'm simply a vessel for the message God has for the world. I love the feeling of surrender and of flow, I write because it's my way of connecting to God.

I don't feel the NEED to figure my life out. I used to have elaborate plans -- a 3 year plan, 5 year plan, and what not. But did I really feel connected to those plans? Nope. Business gurus told me I need to have a 3-5 year plan so I made myself one. I wanted to be a "legit entrepreneur".

Today, I don't feel the need to label myself as "legit" or not. I know deep down that I am worthy, and my worth can never be defined by what I do or how much I achieve. I follow my body's wisdom as she leads me one step at a time. I focus on my intentions and goals in this season of life, and I believe that the "how-tos" in the next season of life will reveal itself when I need it. It'll all unfold in perfect time.

Does that mean I've eliminated my worries and fears? Hell no. Sometimes I find myself spiralling, worried that I'll waste my potential and guilting myself for not achieving more. In these moments, I remind myself of the many miracles I've since experienced, and the massive wealth I already possess.

Most recently, my entire 2 week trip to the US felt like a miracle. This trip reminded me of who wealthy I am: wealth of friendships, energy and resources to explore the world, and support from the Universe in making this trip so much more magical than what was planned.

I booked this trip with so much worry - worried about how I would get around not knowing how to drive, worried about not knowing what to do or who to hang out with, but this trip ended up evolving to be one of the most memorable and distinct reminders of the support I have in this world.

To have met new friends whom I deeply connect with and have friends carve out time and energy to take me around, opening their hearts and their homes - it was truly a miracle.

And I'm sure when YOU think back of the miracles you've already experienced, you will have countless stories to share. These miracles show that we are supported by the Universe and loved beyond measure.

We're living in a society that teaches us (consciously or unconsciously) that we need to prove our worth. We need to "add value" to be of value. Let me tell you this: you are ALREADY worthy and valuable as you are. And when you work on yourself, your gifts will naturally shine and give life to those around you.

Sooo I've shared with you, something I'm afraid people will find out about me. I'm curious - what is yours? Comment below or message me to share with me, and I promise I'll respond with something that may feel liberating to you in this season :)

I'll love to hear your responses :)

Share with me what stood out to you by taking a snapshot of this email letter, and sharing your thoughts on Instagram or LinkedIn.

Alternatively, drop me a DM on Instagram, or join my Telegram Tribe here!

and as always, If you want to build radical self-trust, further elevate your speaking and communication and truly Own Your Voice, you're invited to join the Own Your Voice 6-months coaching program, find out more here, or watch my free masterclass (it's brand new and updated!) to get a clearer idea on what your immediate focuses should be in terms of owning your voice.

You may also purchase my online courses at https://raefung.com/learn-with-rae

Remember, you have everything it takes to Own Your Voice.

About this newsletter:

I want to have conversations about the topics that are uncomfortable yet liberating to discuss. I want to hear your perspectives and stories. If anything I've written sparked a flame within you, I'd love to hear it. It doesn't have to be a professional opinion or a finished story, it can simply be a thought or a feeling.

I release a newsletter every Friday, 6pm SGT (or sometimes a day after... when inspiration hits). I have to confess, I tend to release it on time via my email list. If you prefer to receive them via email, sign up in the link in comments. I send other bonus resources via email that I don't do so here.