Some Members of the Supreme Court Do Their Jobs Justice
Just another day at the office. Photographer: Al Drago/Bloomberg

Some Members of the Supreme Court Do Their Jobs Justice

This is Bloomberg Opinion Today, an enormous amount of political and intellectual energy devoted to?Bloomberg Opinion’s opinions, by Jessica Karl .??Sign up here ?.

Today’s Agenda

PDP

Every office has?that one employee ?who is very good at doing lots of things, just not their Actual Job. They’re doing the coffees. They’re printing the slides for that meeting. They’re Slacking the memes. They’re organizing a birthday brunch for Janice on Friday. But what they’re?not?doing is sending their boss that report by EOD, because they are absolutely, deeply, incredibly?swamped?and need a deadline extension.

Being a justice on?the US Supreme Court is?a different type of beast, of course. But at its core, it’s?not unlike?an office job: Justices have a set of tasks to do each term, and an early summer deadline that they (almost ) always meet. And their?Actual Job is pretty straightforward:?Protect the Democratic Process. PDP, baby! It's a simple mantra, but?“it’s hard to overstate how important it is that this court is prepared to fulfill that duty,”?Noah Feldman?writes. And yet at times, it can feel — to certain people?at least — as though the justices are slacking?juuust a smidge ?on their Actual Job. Today, thankfully, was?not?one of those days:

“In a 6-3 decision, the US Supreme Court firmly?rejected the so-called independent state legislature theory . This bizarre theory would have allowed renegade legislators to violate their state constitutions in setting rules for federal elections —?allowing them to hijack elections for US Congress and even the presidency.”

Noah says the majority decision,?written by Chief Justice John Roberts, is?significant not just because it fulfills the Supreme Court’s duty to PDP, but because of?who?joined it: Brett Kavanaugh and Amy Coney Barrett, who “showed that, notwithstanding their undoubted conservatism, they are not going to be radical revolutionaries when it comes to the basic structure of democratic elections.” Alas, “the same cannot be said for the dissenters, Justices Clarence Thomas, Neil Gorsuch and Samuel Alito,” he writes. Sadly, it seems those three aren’t up to?the demands of their?Actual Job.

Bonus SCOTUS Reading:?Women are disproportionately the targets of online threats. The Supreme Court?just made it trickier ?for them to get justice. —?Noah Feldman

We Need to Talk About?Frappélachia

While?a bunch of TikTokers are having all sorts?of?fun?turning the McDonald’s Grimace milkshake into?a horror movie ?where kids try?the purple drink and?immediately?pass?out , I’d argue that?this ?McDonald’s Frappé advertisement?is just as deserving — if not more?— of our scorn:

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Frappélachia???? No. Absolutely not.?“If there’s one thing appalachians love it’s a big corporation pandering to them with an ostentatiously unnecessary accent mark,”?@stefanielaine ?tweeted. “they could have asked just one frappalachian ????,”?@loreestark ?replied. Luckily for McDonald’s (and the?Appalachian Regional Commission ),?Frappé ?season is fleeting — as is apparently the number of?working ice cream machines ?at its?franchises. For other companies, however, brand updates can be more deadly than a?Grimace shake.

Rebranding in the age of crowdsourced snark ?is a blood sport,”? Ben Schott ?writes. Before the social-media hive mind was born, a truly egregious brand makeover may have received a scathing sentence in the local newspaper, he notes. But nowadays, brand vigilantes are incredibly quick to jump on the slightest hint of a corporate mishap.?

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Rebrands have always been a battleground, perhaps because logos and our affinity to them are rooted in a time and a place: Apple’s iTunes logo with the tiny CD on it is nostalgic, in a?Microsoft Paint ?sort of way. But that doesn’t mean Steve Jobs was wrong to?ditch it ?in 2010 when your walkman started collecting dust in the closet. Knee-jerk jerk design criticisms are often fleeting. Ben points to the recent rebrand of?HBO Max , arguing that it’ll likely follow the trajectory of other entities like?Slack ,?The Met ,?Dunkin Donuts ?and?Pringles , whose rebrands initially drew ire, only to survive and, in most cases, thrive. Yes, some rebrands are?straight-up ugly . And?others ?can reflect?deeper fissures ?within a brand’s identity (see: The highly anticipated?return of?Old Céline ’s?Phoebe Philo ). But most of the time, a new look just takes some getting used to. Read?the whole thing . Or go watch some Max?in Frappélachia, for all I care.

Crash Course

“We spent the last seven years at war with ourselves or with each other about Brexit. We devoted an enormous amount of political and intellectual energy to this fight,?and that created very unstable politics.”

Tim O'Brien ?spoke with?Bloomberg Opinion columnist? adrian wooldridge ?about?Britain’s post-Brexit drift ?on the latest episode of?Crash Course .

Telltale Charts

As someone who A) Doesn’t own a home, B) Is convinced that she will never be able to buy a home and C) Still experiences?fear and loathing every time she?reads about the impending?housing implosion, I don’t know whether to be heartened or dismayed by? Allison Schrager ’s?latest column ?on America’s housing market. She writes:?The 30-year mortgage “may well be the only thing keeping the US housing market from collapse right now.” America’s widespread adoption of long-term mortgage rates stands in contrast to the housing habits of other countries, like the UK, Canada and New Zealand, which are fast-approaching a “mortgage tsunami ” — to borrow a phrase from?Marcus?Ashworth?—?that could have?catastrophic implications for their economies. In the US, though, 90% of households are paying less than current rates on their mortgage, Allison says. The implication?is that nobody is going to move, supply will stay?tight,?prices will stay propped up, and?we may just steer?clear of a recession.?

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A couple weeks ago, I?spent a Saturday with my sister in suburban bliss. We blasted?Taylor Swift , driving around in our mom’s SUV with the sunroof open, hitting up T.J. Maxx, Old Navy and?the Sephora in Kohl's (iykyk). It was?magical. You can’t tell me that a?T.J. Maxx in suburbia is the same as the ones in the?city. Sure, you?can buy a cheese grater and a sports bra for a grand total of like, $6.99, anywhere. But shopping in the suburbs just hits different: There are?more clothes. The deals?feel?better. And the cashiers are beyond friendly. All of these good vibes are not a figment of my imagination: “Shopping patterns have fundamentally changed ?in a way that doesn’t favor downtowns,”? Leticia Miranda ?writes, noting that “over the last two years, suburban retail has outperformed urban areas.” Retailers like?Nordstrom ?and?Walmart ?will claim they’re leaving cities like?San Francisco and Chicago?because of bad stuff like crime, but really it’s because their?stores aren’t built for the big city?anymore:

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Further Reading

Punishment?for?wayward bank executives ?is a decision best left to investors. —?Bloomberg’s editorial board

Eli Lilly’s?new weight-loss drug ?is even better than Ozempic. —? Lisa Jarvis

Russia’s mutiny calls attention to?a troubling phenomenon ?for Big Oil: fragility. —? Liam Denning

Direct air capture plants ?could be the engineering marvel of our lifetime. —? Lara Williams

Nothing’s?wrong?with?IBM’s latest software purchase , but isn’t?exactly?jazzing investors. —? Dave Lee

Our productivity is declining ?— but not for the reasons you may think. —? Justin Fox

ICYMI

Silicon Valley’s tech nerds are?bullies ?now ...

…?and they’re fueled by?magic mushrooms .?1

Ryan Seacrest is the new?Wheel of Fortune ?host.

There’s a new?Trump audio tape .

This?Manhattan loft ?comes with a catch.

Kickers

Barbie?Feet 101 .

There’s a?new avocado ?in town ...

…?and a?better way ?to tell if it’s ripe.

“Ask app?not to track ” is awful. (h/t? Mike Nizza )

The floor?is?lava , but this is?NOT?a?pizza :

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Notes:?Please send focaccia topped with fruit and feedback to Jessica Karl?at?[email protected] .

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  1. Matt Levine?has?thoughts .

This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of the editorial board or Bloomberg LP and its owners.





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