SOLVING THE UNSOLVABLE

We are often on the search to solve problems, find solutions, get an answer, understand that cliffhanger. It's our human nature. Since we grow, change and develop, finding the answers gives us something to react to, the opportunity to learn how to react better and gives us some end point versus just letting our mind go around in circles only to never really know what we're reacting to. 

Unfortunately we can't always get the answers, there are times when they are just not available to us.

Unfortunately we can't always get the answers, there are times when they are just not available to us. You know those times all too well I'm sure. That boyfriend that broke up with you in high school and you never knew why? That show or book that ended with a question and you could just imagine the resolution but no one gave it to you in a pretty box. And of course those times when you left a job either on your end or the company's end and things didn't go as planned, ties are cut and you will never know what really happened. 

This is all part of life and yet it doesn't stop us from exploring, looking for answers, aiming for a resolution so we don't ruminate or get down. It's a very challenging thing to experience of course, to not have a resolution and to have to put a period on that sentence on your own, changing it from that question mark. It's work, it's sometimes a struggle, you may wake up in the middle of night asking questions, what really happened? Why did it happen? What could have I done differently? What could have they done differently? Will I ever have an answer or will it always be a mystery? 

Will I ever have an answer or will it always be a mystery? 

We have to sometimes admit the mystery, the unsolvable, that we must just move on, leave it behind us and focus on something else, that can bring you happiness and success, versus stress and unhappiness. 

I do believe we have the right to seek answers, however it’s important to ensure our intention to get answers is a healthy one.

I do believe we have the right to seek answers, however it’s important to ensure our intention to get answers is a healthy one. One that can make us feel better, not worse. One that will bring us some resolution rather than prove that the other is in the wrong. If your intention is to put down or make others feel as crappy or confused as you did with the lack of resolution, then you’re stooping to their low level. The intention should relate to your right to find a level of calmness seeking answers and accepting if you can’t. The intention is one to resolve things instead of create more suffering. 

As the outside world can’t always give us answers, we may need to come to terms with it on our own and decide to move on, accepting it as fact, unchangeable. It may not be something we want but life isn’t always clear and there will be patches and holes that we can’t cover. 

So what in your life are you still seeking answers to? What resolution are you searching for that you know the outside world won’t provide you? What unstoppable rumination is going on in your mind? What have you not decided to move on from? Think about all this and decide if moving on and accepting is a better choice for your mental health than not. Only you can decide. 

Think about all this and decide if moving on and accepting is a better choice for your mental health than not. Only you can decide. 

Help me spread the #ThoughtfulThursday idea by commenting, starting a conversation with your thoughts, sharing this article with a friend and making improvements in your life by taking the most important aspects of what you read and applying them. 

My hope is that these ideas help you in the way you desire them to. 

Thank you,

Tamara

Fitness and Wellness Coach, Personal Trainer, Instructor

EdM, MA Psychological Counseling, NASM Personal Trainer, AFAA Group Fitness, Precision Nutrition Level 1

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