Soft Skills for Instructional Designers Question

So I have a follow-up question to my post about Instructional Designers yesterday about Soft Skills. So if interested, read on. If not, have a nice day anyway : )

Soft skills are not a substitute for talent and/or a ton of effort to mirror real skill (which, in case no one told you, means you have that skill once you’ve done it for a while…you got this). I’m looking at you, pretty-looking CapitalOne and Apple tech folks, in my imagination, whose own coworkers and gen pop can’t stand (some of my nearest and dearest are CapOne folks who love it…and they don’t like peacocking pretenders either and have to sift those energy vampires out year-round).?

I ask you this:

?Has this always been the case, or is kissing ass just soo ingrained in what you do that you cannot distinguish between the effort that fills the well, versus superficial or superfluous noise that takes away from the universe?

?I suspect it has always been the case, so it behooves us all to see through it occasionally, or all the time, if you’d like to be useful sometimes. I’m reflective, not judgmental, so nothing personal here, just voicing some legitimate points to maybe comfort some of my peers that you can do great work and feel good too, but you must see through the bullshit, do the work, and speak thoughtfully about it.

Soft skills and being able to have comfortable and uncomfortable conversations are critical to your ability to thrive and endure, but fluff is short-term gain and that lack of substance will bite you in the ass professionally when they realize they don’t pay you to do all that much; then, your self-esteem goes to shit because you are doing meaningless work for the system, a system that doesn’t think you’re very good at what you do either; talk about a downward spiral.

Professionally, that’s what you choose to do, unless you do otherwise. Don’t get all life coach-y in your head here. Keep the principle simple: do the baller shit that you think a baller in this space would do. That’s it. Hunker down and get it done. There has never been easy, there is only hard work and if you lead the charge and take the reins on the work you choose to engage in, you can own and help reimagine that space. Play the Tupac song, Me Against The World, or whatever your jam is (for me it is usually something by Bad Omens), and let the music and your work, your actions, do the talking. The flashy folks who go to all the networking events (you will be that person and probably have been that person…air hugs…you can let it go now), cycle in and out, and are interesting when they can back it up, and you might have that person in your company or two, but mostly you don’t and the ones who veer close to it will quickly shed veils too.

So, you know it is all work and while it is hard at times, the joy far exceeds anything else in such exponential and profound ways; not kidding. You are working hard, but you are working hard at things you are passionate about and taking command of. There is nada that compares professionally to that exhilaration; it will add fuel to both your personal and professional growth; if you don’t have both, or you are not able to actively work toward both right now, this is a huge opportunity for you to recognize and see your problem and act to course correct; seeing that you have a problem is half the battle.

Professional pretenders are lost, so you should be kind to them, while not entertaining their nonsense. I have not always been as kind with my response to people bullshitting the world around them as I could have been. I guess I am not terribly sorry either, but was sorry to make myself and others uncomfortable, of course. Once you take ownership of your professionalism, it is hard to parse those who would waste your time, intentionally or otherwise. I still have a lot of work to do like any other person and I try to lead with kindness. Even when I know people are full of it, I try to be patient (hard when you drink too much caffeine, but even then!) and kind.

People sometimes need a hand to hold too, especially if you think they’d be alright with a little guidance. We don’t know what we don’t know, so look for open minds and try to support those who want the same as you. If you have ever successfully managed teams, you get this more than anyone. Gravitate toward those people and eventually, just maybe, you can help shape your culture to own where more than one person walks the walk and talks the talk. If you are not in the environment or feel like you cannot create or nurture that, you have to get out as quickly as possible.

So soft skills are integral for Instructional Design and all jobs; if you are putting your best foot forward and want to Peacock a little, have a good time. Just be honest with yourself and put in the work when and where you see opportunities to do so. Easier said than done, so be kind and work hard enough to feel like you might be doing more than the average bear. Start there, and then, the faster you get to this should be your all-day, every day, the better.? Real confidence in your craft cannot be replicated. And go to a networking event occasionally, if you see value in it. There is nothing quite as amusing as listening to an old dude talk about his $1000 loafers and ear hair issues. True story…blergh. I will end there. You are welcome.