Social interactions in the times of social distancing
Urooj Mazhar
Global Learning & Development Expert | Strategic Learning Initiatives | Leadership Development | Driving DEI & Organizational Growth
With the onslaught of paranoia and fear, human emotion is tested. Almost like substances - alcohol, drugs - draw out our inner selves, fear brings out raw vulnerability. And we don’t know vulnerability. We are taught to be ‘brave’ ‘funny’ ‘heroes’. We don’t know to be vulnerable without breaking down, masking it with sarcasm and jokes, or creating a fence and hiding in. We don't know how to do it with bravery and compassion as it should be done.
As the pandemic increases along the social distancing, when we do meet people, there is a question in our eyes: will you give me Corona? Where have you been? Are you hiding your symptoms? When not dealt right, these questions are shaming and bring our armour up, causing a dent in our relationships.
Here are a couple of tips for social interactions in the times of social distancing:
- In times of uncertainty, fewer choices make us feel in control. Having boundaries help us feel safe. If you feel scared, don’t debate the choice of whether or not to step out for leisure. Minimize the chaos in your head. Cut down options so decision making is easier. Instead of trying to keep a distance, excessively use sanitizers, being on the edge and not enjoying a social intimate gathering, opt to stay in peacefully.
- Be clear. Clear is kind. Express your feelings without blame, suspicion, and guilt. Instead of saying, “I don’t know where everyone has been…” triggering others to be defensive, use concise “I feel” sentences. E.g. I feel uncomfortable and I would like to stay home. Or I have decided to exercise caution and I would like to skip this one out. When you clearly state your wants, you give respect to them and enable others to respect it too.
- Compassion with responsibility. Everyone is scared. We are more connected today as a human race than I can remember. Extend a smile. Continue to hold the door for someone behind you. Don’t assume the worst. Don’t treat people as a virus-giving-machine. Instead, take responsibility for yourself. Remember it’s easier to project our fear in the form of blame, shame, and guilt than to be brave and own it.
Stay kind, brave and safe.