So, we all, um, use filler words, right? Well, here’s how to stop.

So, it’s human nature to, y’know, use filler words. Right? It is. Some people use filler words to help soften a rejection, like when they’re turning down a romantic overture. Other people use fillers when they’re nervous—such as when they’re giving a high-stakes presentation.

But even in casual conversation, people use filler words as placeholders when their brain races ahead of their mouth and they’re trying to process what to say next. This can also happen when you’re put on the spot unexpectedly or asked your opinion on an unfamiliar topic.

The problem is that our brain is capable of processing information much faster than our mouth can speak. The average person speaks at around 125 to 150 words per minute, but according to research from Missouri University, our brain thinks at 400 words per minute. (Other studies say the rate may be as high as 1,500 words per minute). Consultant Noah Zandan estimates that the average speaker uses five fillers per minute. (For what it’s worth, the technical terms for filler words are “disfluencies,” “discourse markers” and “filled pauses.”)

Linguist Valerie Fridland makes the case in her latest book* that some use of filler words—y’know, words like um, uh, and, um, y’know—make us more authentic communicators. And there are a few strategic reasons to use filler words, like when you’re trying to finish your thought in a meeting without letting someone interrupt.

And research has also shown that filler words can actually be a sign of intelligence. A study published in the Journal of Language and Social Psychology found that people who use more filler words tend to have higher IQs and are more likely to be creative problem solvers.

The problem is that your audience doesn’t associate filler words with brilliance. Separate research suggests that excessive use of filler words can have a significant impact on how a speaker is perceived. In one study, participants rated speakers who used more filler words as less confident, less competent, and less intelligent compared to those who used fewer filler words.

Another study found that listeners are more likely to assume a speaker is anxious or unprepared, even when that isn’t the case. And John R. Schafer, professor at Western Illinois University and a retired FBI Special Agent, says that filler words sometimes signal deception. Words such as "you know," "I mean," and "right" are used to either convince or seek confirmation from the listener.

Interestingly, the use of filler words can also be influenced by the speaker's position and authority. One study found that when a manager regularly used filler words, their direct reports were more likely to use the same phrases—likely as a way to mirror the speaking patterns of their leader. This suggests that as you rise into positions of greater leadership, it becomes even more important to minimize filler words to model the type of communication you want to see from your team.

"Filler" words are, to me, like dandelions. A few are tolerable, a yard full are weeds. When we speak, filler words weaken our clarity, credibility—and promotability.

Here are six ways to reduce the risk of using filler words when the stakes are high (such as a critical business presentation). The las two tips are what I recommend to my executive clients:

1. Know your material cold. As they say, there’s no substitute for practice. If you're giving a presentation or speaking in public, rehearse what you're going to say beforehand. For important presentations, the rule of thumb is that you should rehearse one hour for every minute you’re expected to speak. The more prepared you are, the less likely you are to use filler words. Steve Jobs blocked out two weeks to rehearse his product launches, which helps explains why they were so memorable.
2. Create a roadmap. Create an outline of your speech or presentation to help you stay organized and focused. This will also help you avoid getting sidetracked and then stumbling over your words.
3. Eliminate Distractions. When you're speaking, eliminate any distractions that may cause you to lose your train of thought. Turn off your phone, close your laptop, and silence any other devices that might interrupt you.
4. Listen to Yourself. Record yourself speaking and listen to the playback. Take note of any filler words you use and work on eliminating them. Ask a friend or colleague to listen to you speak and point out any filler words you use. They can clap, snap their fingers, or tap the table every time you use a filler word, just so you’re conscious of the habit.
5. Speak Slowly. When you speak quickly, you're more likely to use filler words. Speaking slowly and deliberately will help you be more precise with your words. I recommend that executives—and anyone who aspires to greater responsibility—get in the habit of speaking slowly. Not only does it keep you from using filler words, it also makes you appear much more thoughtful. For some clients, I’ve used the metronome app on my phone and set it to tick slowly while the speaker rehearses. This has the effect of slowing them down. (And yes, this is a digital version of the metronomes that some of used when learning to play piano as a kid.)
6. Use Pauses. Instead of using a filler word, simply pause. This helps synchronize your brain and voice and allows you to gather your thoughts (and makes you appear thoughtful, to boot). If you’re taking questions after a Town Hall or other presentation, don’t be bashful about taking a long pause before answering a tough question. Take a sip of water before you answer. Repeating the question aloud will also buy you more time. Audiences grade you on the quality of your answer, not the speed. Try to relax. Nervousness can exacerbate the use of filler words. Visualizing a receptive audience or focusing on your preparation can help you alleviate anxiety.

While filler words may be a natural part of human communication, excessive use of them can undermine our credibility and confidence. By practicing our presentations, creating a roadmap, eliminating distractions, listening to ourselves, speaking slowly, and using pauses, we can reduce our reliance on filler words and become more effective communicators.

Remember, it's not about eliminating filler words entirely, but about using them strategically and being mindful of our language. With practice and self-awareness, we can become more articulate, confident, and persuasive speakers.

I offer an array of executive communications services, including speechwriting, executive coaching, and group workshops. If you’d like a free, 15-minute consultation, contact me at [email protected] or at https://inspirentcomms.com/contact-us/. Details about my services can be found at https://inspirentcomms.com.

?* Like, Literally, Dude: Arguing for the good in bad English, by Valerie Fridland. Viking Books, 2023.