Will Smith, Chris Rock And The Modern Emasculated Man

[I made a?YouTube video on this on Monday ?with my initial thoughts. YouTube is the easiest and fastest way to react. My?Work On Your Game Podcast ?is second fastest, where I articulate more in-depth. Writing is the hardest and slowest format; I needed to think on this more and also (unavoidably) absorb myriad perspectives before writing this. Here goes…]

Why Comedians Host The Oscars?

The Academy Awards, aka The Oscars, started in 1929. I wasn't around back then, but we know what the awards have developed into (in a similar vein to the Grammys, MTV Awards and others): A place for well-paid and famous people to gather, take photos, give each other awards and make themselves more fame and more money.?

That’s show business [see?these episodes for more ].?

The Academy smartly has comedians host the show for one specific (and very smart) purpose: To run interference.?

In plain language, the job of the comedian host is to remind the rich & famous attendees – and fawning viewers – that these stars shouldn't take themselves too seriously.?

That’s why people like Billy Crystal, Whoopi Goldberg (back when she was funny), Ellen DeGeneres, and David Letterman have all hosted the Oscars.?

As I said when discussing Dave Chappelle last year: Comedians serve an important role in society. They have the license to make jokes about things and people that we either take too seriously or are too afraid to talk about.?

[A timely example: Chris Rock’s?“Black People Vs. Ni**az” ?bit from 1996.]?

Comedians hosting the Oscars bring levity to the event and remind your favorite thespians that they aren't above some good-natured ribbing.?

The Smack Heard ‘Round The World

We all know?what happened this past Sunday .?

Chirs Rock, a well-known and widely-liked comedian hosting the Oscars (again), told a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith’s close-cropped hair and related it to the G.I. Jane movie.?

Everyone laughed. The audience laughed. You saw the video; Will Smith himself laughed.?

Jada did not laugh.?

She shot her husband Will a look just before cameras cut back to Rock on stage, and next thing we know, Will Smith walked on the stage and smacked Chris Rock.?

Then he sat down and yelled from his seat, twice, “keep my wife’s name out your fucking mouth!”?

To his credit, Chris Rock took things in stride and continued doing his job.?

The rest of the awards show went off without incident.?

Let’s talk about what all of this means, as the smack is merely a symptom of a bigger issue.?

Tyler, Denzel & Bradley

First of all, if you saw the non-TV feed video of the aftermath of the incident (while the show was on a commercial break), you see legendary actor Denzel Washington, Producer Tyler Perry and actor Bradley Cooper coming up to Will Smith, consoling him and apparently working to calm him down.?

This is a man who just lost all emotional control in the one place where he probably should not have, and all hands are on deck to help HIM??

I didn’t see anyone coming to Chris Rock’s aid. Chris is the one who stayed professional and was actually doing his job at the moment.?

Will Smith has been famous for over 30 years; I’m sure that’s not the first time someone has made a public joke about him or a member of his immediate family (as his wife Jada and both of his younger kids, Jaden and Willow, are all famous in their own right).?

I don't see Chris Rock as a victim, and it doesn't appear he sees himself as one (he kept going immediately after the smack, declined to press criminal charges, and performed in Boston on Wednesday night). Will was clearly in the wrong here on a logical level (we’ll get to the other levels momentarily).?

It was interesting to see these men rush to the aid of a man who’d just committed, in legal terms, a public battery at a show that has gone out if its way to appease the woke population as if he was the one who needed help.?

“Supposed To Be Offended”

To her credit as I play devil’s advocate, Jada never laughed at Chris Rock’s joke.?

And, as I learned (and maybe you did too), Jada has alopecia, an auto-immune disease that causes hair loss (this and “disrespect” have been the main defense points for people who’ve argued that Will’s actions were justified).??

From the?American Academy Of Dermatology :?

Many people who develop alopecia are otherwise healthy. They have hair loss and sometimes nail changes, but they remain in good health.

Alopecia is literally the medical term for “bald.”?

This means I have alopecia, as do all my uncles on my mom’s side and many other men that I know.?

While I get that it may be a bit more socially awkward for females than for men, alopecia is not some terminal diagnosis, such as cancer.?

Jada Pinkett is not dying. She’s had short hair for a long time, and had I not heard people using “alopecia!” to defend her hubby’s actions, I wouldn't have even noticed a difference in her appearance. She looked how she’s always looked.?

When Rock made the G.I. Jane joke, Will laughed. Jada did not. What we don't know (and maybe never will know), is what transpired in the 3 seconds after the camera cut back to Chris Rock and Will went from laughing to approaching the stage to slap Chris.?

Here’s my theory: Wokeness overtook Will Smith.?

Wokeness has overtaken a lot of people. One symptom of being woke is that a person decides what to laugh at, be offended by, pay attention to, and ignore based on what they're supposed to do, not on their actual thoughts and beliefs.?

We saw Will Smith’s visceral reaction to the G.I. Jane joke, which was laughter. It was a light, corny throwaway joke that no one would have remembered three minutes later… except for what happened next.?

Will’s stage approach was the reaction that he apparently was supposed to have, which was apparently (this is my theory) brought on by what his wife’s reaction (maybe words? Maybe just the look she had on her face?) told him to do.?

The Explanation

Will Smith did indeed win the Oscar for his role in “King Richard,” a movie based on the life of Richard Williams, the father of tennis stars Venus and Serena Williams.?

In his acceptance speech, a teary-eyed Will Smith explained that he was dealing with a lot of emotions, that he had been doing his best to defend his family, that he and they and he had been under attack from various angles.?

He mentioned how Denzel Washington had told him that the devil would come for him at his highest moment.?

He mentioned how he felt that he was, on some levels, channeling Richard Williams himself in how Williams had to defend his daughters from a not-so-welcoming-to-blacks tennis industry decades earlier.

All bullshit.?

As I said on YouTube on Monday: If you wanted to slap Chris Rock, OWN IT.?

Just admit that that’s what you wanted to do.

Don’t hide behind your wife and family — none of whom were under attack nor faced any threat at the Academy Awards.

Don’t blame the devil.?

Don’t hide behind Richard Williams, who, as far as I know, didn’t slap any comedians over jokes in helping Venus and Serena make history in their sport.

I would’ve respected Will saying, “hey, this guy stepped out of line, so I checked him.” But he didn’t do that. He hid behind explanations that sounded good. It’s not manly.

Protection??

Jada Pinkett-Smith is a public figure.?

She used to date Tupac. Jada acted in one of my favorite movies, “A Low Down Dirty Shame” with Keenan Ivory Wayans. Jada has a popular podcast called Red Table Talk.?

I’ve never seen a full episode. But there’s one episode that a lot of people know about, and even I know about it even though I don’t watch the show.

A couple years ago, Jada brought her own husband, Will Smith, onto her show to discuss an “entanglement” she had gotten into with another man.

The other man was a famous singer who is the age of one of the couple’s children. The viral image of Will Smith’s red-eyed face during the conversation was all over social media for weeks.?

Jada brought her husband onto her podcast and embarrassed him, emasculated him, by telling him publicly that she had been having sex with another man.

Emasculate: to deprive (a man) of his male role or identity. To make weaker or less effective.

It has been suggested in the time since, even by Will himself, that the Smith’s marriage may be somewhat unconventional. Both members have suggested that their relationship is an open one, with each partner free to have sex with other people at their leisure.

Will and Jada have openly offered this information to the public, which makes it fair game.?

Will Smith has been the butt of social media jokes and memes for the last couple of years ever since that Red Table Talk appearance, being labeled as a man who is really more like “the bitch” in his relationship.?

In other words, an emasculated man who has lost his identity and is, on an emotional level, playing the supporting role to a female in his marriage.

While Will is rich and famous, and has been for a long time, he is not immune to seeing what is being said about him online.

Will Smith slapped Chris Rock not to “protect” his wife. He went on stage to protect his brand, his reputation and emasculated ego.

The wife that he alluded to protecting is the very reason he needed to do so.

Legendary Georgetown basketball coach John Thompson once said that a public figure should have three lives.?

1) A public life?

2) A personal life?

3) A private life

Will Smith went on stage and slapped Chris Rock to protect his ego because his wife, Jada, has made a business out of making their private life public. And Will has supported this behavior by appearing on the show.?

He laughed at Rock’s joke. But when he saw that his wife wasn’t laughing, he needed to do something — quick — to get his testicles back.?

Chris Rock’s chin was mere collateral damage.?

The Standing Ovation

When Will won his award later that evening, the attendees gave him a standing ovation and an encore of cheers as he cried during his acceptance speech.?

He had just committed a crime by physically attacking the comedian host, then cussed the host out from his seat. And your favorite actors and actresses gave him a standing ovation as he delivered that 6-minute feminized explanation of his actions.?

Hollywood TV stars are not the place to look for your moral direction and rational reasoning.?

The Erosion Of Masculinity?

Let’s not forget the Race Hustlers, who masterfully find their way even into a black-on-black crime discussion.??

Some said it was beautiful to see a black man “defending black women.”

Men defend women from an attack — not from a joke.?

Will approaching the stage was about HIMSELF — not about his wife.?

He showed up to his wife’s show years ago and was made to feel like less of a man. He came to the event feeling like less of a man. Chris Rock’s joke was harmless — but the look that the boss of his family (Jada) gave him reminded him of his less-of-a-man status.?

Then he did something about it, with a target where he knew he could get away with it.?

There was nothing manly about this. The only person Will Smith defended was himself and his bruised, emasculated ego.?

The Run-Up Era Is OVER (And Has Been Over For A Long Time)

I’m 40 years of age. Grew up in the 1990s and early 2000s — an era where this kind of stuff happened regularly (though not in dress suits).?

My associates and I went to house parties and danced with all the neighborhood girls and nearly had to fight our way out of venues. Catcalled every female who walked by our block. Fought over basketball games.?

If you’re unfamiliar with the terminology, to “run up” means to physically and aggressively approach someone over something they did or said, innocently or not, and make an issue out of it.??

Back in the pre-smartphone days, it was normal to run up on another male over a disagreement. After all, there was no other way to communicate and we were all younger, dumber and less evolved.?

Alluding to Chris Rock’s skit, this was N-word behavior. I was an active participant. It was the norm at that time. I’ve been on both ends of such exchanges.?

N-word behavior isn’t cool anymore. Will Smith has been out of that world for decades. So, “that’s where he’s from” is NOT a justification. Dude has attended 100 award shows and walked just as many red carpets.?

This is another byproduct of Wokeness: Remove standards for black people and use their alleged backgrounds and history to excuse present-day stupidity.?

To quote Rock’s bit linked above: “Not getting in trouble is what you’re SUPPOSED to do — you low-standards-having-motherfucker!!”?

In “the streets,” n-word behavior still goes on today. But it’s slowly being phased out.?

People channel their aggression through social media apps now, not fisticuffs.?

Athletes don’t even fight in games anymore. They grab their phones in the locker room and talk shit via comments and captions.

The Oscars are NOT “the streets.”?

The Academy Awards bring together a bunch of well-paid people to give awards to each other while wearing designer clothing and jewelry and getting their photos taken, all for the purpose of looking and feeling important so they can go and make more money.?

Nobody who attends the Academy Awards is under attack by anything a comedian host can say.

Anyone who’s living in the ‘hood, saying that Will Smith was channeling “the streets,” find a better defense.?

The Not-Apology-Apology?

Will Smith?offered an apology a day after the show ?where he specifically mentioned Chris Rock.?

Everything in the apology is about himself.?

It’s all I, my, me, I, and I again. It’s what happens when your publicist writes your apologies.?

Chris Rock couldn’t even accept this apology, as nothing in it is about Chris, Chris’ kids, his family, or anything other than Will Smith. Will is still more focused on himself than he is anything or anyone else — including his wife.?

Will Smith appears to be a wise, evolved man. I would expect a deeper, more sincere, in-person-and-on-camera apology is coming in the future.?

Feminine Men (And Masculine Women) Who Defend Will’s Actions

I was listening to a guy named Kevin Samuels on YouTube who took some live calls on his show about the incident.?

Kevin usually converses with women on the topic of relationships (side note: it’s quite entertaining), but he invited some men (and women) who wanted to defend Will Smith’s actions.?

The justifications were eye-opening.?

“Chris disrespected his wife!”?

“Will’s from the streets!”?

“He’s human and he has feelings!”?

For the women saying this: Any woman who feels that a man’s “job” is to get physical with other men anytime she feels “disrespected” is a big reason why our prisons are filled with black men ages 18-35.?

It’s not for small-time drug offenses from smoking weed. It’s violent crimes committed by men whose only tool for earning respect is aggression, and men who’ve been raised primarily by women and thus don't have the tools to deal with other men in a respectable way.?

These types of women are extremely dangerous to men. They put the “battery” in men’s backs to prove themselves to women. Un-evolved men fall for it every day.?

For the men saying this: There are two ways to earn respect: Demanding and Commanding [will be covered on podcast episode #2157: Demanding Vs Commanding].?

To DEMAND is to force compliance as if it’s owed to you.?

To COMMAND is to draw an energy out of people because of the way you carry yourself; they WANT to give it to you.?

Kevin made a powerful statement at the end of his show.?

“Power is what you CAN do – but you choose NOT to.”?

That’s how respect is commanded – not demanded.?

Conclusion

Though it’s unfortunate, I’m glad this situation happened.?

It exposed the shallowness of many people’s thinking.?

It showed us all how times have changed.??

It showed how some of us, including myself, need to think about how we conduct ourselves.?

It uncovered the different ways people define and go about earning “respect.”?

Respect: a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.

Being respected, on a day-to-day human level, is not about being tough, threatening, attacking, or serving your ego. It’s about carrying yourself in a way that ELICITS admiration – not forced fear or compliance.?

Will Smith tried to demand respect at the Oscars – and for a brief moment, he achieved it. But once people got to process what they saw, I think we can agree: In aggregate, Will Smith is LESS respected now than he was before stepping onto that stage Sunday night.?

His wife still has alopecia.?

He may have earned some points with people in “the streets” – when was the last time Will was in the streets? When is he scheduled to go back? How much money does he make there??

Being masculine is not about being tough. It’s about controlling your emotions and conducting yourself in a manner that COMMANDS – not demands – respect.?

Read my book?The Mirror Of Motivation?so you can learn to command that respect from yourself first — then you can get it from the rest of the world.?

I’ll send you a free copy, just cover the shipping here:?https://MirrorOfMotivation.com