Smashing the Patriarchy is a Team Sport

It’s FRIDAY! I’m a FEMINIST! And we’re back with a new edition of ? FEMINISM FRIDAY ?!

This week, we’re discussing something a little different: the idea that women don’t just need to look up to other women. Shocking, I know! But hear me out... while having badass female role models is ESSENTIAL, we shouldn’t sleep on the fact that men can be great role models for us too. Yep, I said it. Men. The ones historically responsible for *checks notes* patriarchy, sexism, and pockets so small they can barely hold a Tic Tac. ??

But let’s not throw the entire gender out with the misogynistic bathwater. Because here’s the thing... if we want equality, we need to stop putting people into rigid gendered boxes when it comes to inspiration. If a man demonstrates kindness, strength, integrity, and a solid commitment to smashing the patriarchy alongside us, why wouldn’t we look up to him?

Breaking the “Women Only” Myth

There’s this unspoken rule in some feminist spaces that women should exclusively look up to other women. And, look, I totally get it. For centuries, history books were basically a highlight reel of “Great Men Doing Great Things,” while the accomplishments of women were tucked away in the footnotes (if they were even mentioned at all). Naturally, we want to uplift women, celebrate their achievements, and ensure future generations have PLENTY of badass ladies to admire.

But does that mean we should pretend no man has ever been worth looking up to? Of course not. We don’t gain equality by mirroring the exclusionary tactics that held us back in the first place.

Men Who Lead by Example

Think about the men who have actually done the work... the ones who have fought for justice, stood up for women, and lived lives of integrity and courage. Nelson Mandela? Absolute icon. David Attenborough? The definition of wholesome masculinity. Barack Obama? You may not agree with EVERYTHING he did, but watching a man publicly praise and respect his intelligent, accomplished wife? Unmatched energy.

And let’s not forget the men in our own lives... dads, boyfriends, brothers, teachers, bosses, mentors... who have encouraged us, believed in us, and refused to buy into the toxic bullshit that says women are somehow less than. My dad? Biggest legend going. My boyfriend? Absolute 10/10. My brothers? Well, I guess they're alright..

Good Role Models Show Us What’s Possible... Regardless of Gender

What makes a good role model? Is it gender, or is it character? Spoiler alert: it’s character. A great role model isn’t someone who simply LOOKS like you; it’s someone who INSPIRES you. Someone who makes you think, “Damn, I want to be that brave, that kind, that determined.”

A young girl who admires Malala Yousafzai? Amazing. A young girl who admires Martin Luther King? Equally amazing. The important thing is that she’s inspired by people who champion justice, not just people who share her gender.

Smashing the Patriarchy Is a Team Effort

Let’s be real... feminism isn’t about women vs men... it’s about everyone working together to create a more just, equitable world. And that means men need to step up, challenge sexism, and be the kind of people we’d actually want to look up to. When they do? We should absolutely give them credit. (But not TOO much, because we all know how men get when they think they’ve invented feminism ??)

So, here’s the takeaway: Women should celebrate women, of course. But we should also be open to finding inspiration wherever it appears. Because the goal isn’t just to put women on pedestals... it’s to make sure the entire world, men included, is working toward a better future for everyone.

Now, tell me: Which men... famous or in your life... have inspired you? Drop their names in the comments, and let’s give them their well-earned feminist props.?And a bit of love. It is Valentine's Day after all.