Smashing the patriarchy - Is my boss a narcissist?

Same, same, but different!!!

We sometimes have this pristine view of leadership, but actual leadership is uncomfortable, controversial, difficult, messy, and often lonely.

As we have seen across the world, so many refuse to step up and lead.

And, it's even more rare, for our world leaders to demonstrate any introspection or self-awareness.?

Hence, too often, narcissists are in charge, using ego as a battering ram to fulfil their own agenda!

The recent appointment of Geert Wilders coined the EU's nightmare with his anti-Muslim rhetoric is a great example of this type of narcissistic leader.

I am pretty sure, I've seen this guy somewhere before????!!!!!

The 3 types of narcissistic boss leaders

When narcissists dominate leadership positions, they shape the norms, attitudes, and practices of the organisation, making it unsafe for everyone!

If you are wondering, am I working with a narcissist, here are 3 types of bosses to look out for;

Type 1 - Arrogant deceitful style. These leaders are grandiose and will make a lot of superficial gestures that they will rarely follow through on.

This is because they live mostly in a place of fantasy and often exploit their positions for personal gain, showing little regard for the feelings and well-being of others.

Despite being well polished and often look and sound amazing. Beware, as they will draw you into their superficial world of make-believe, which is mostly deceitful, even if appears to be endearing.

Type 2 - Deficient affective style leaders lack empathy and remorse, particularly towards their subordinates.

They use their position to assert control over others and fulfil their own needs.

This means you will often experience feeling gaslighted, as they rarely accept responsibility for anything!

It is important to write things down when working with type 2 leaders to avoid questioning yourself unnecessarily or it may seem like you are losing your mind.

Type 3 - Irresponsible impulsive style. These leaders often lack goals and jump from one thing to another on a whim which makes it difficult to maintain consistency or finish anything.

To avoid this whirlwind, make any consequences clear to them, through impact language. Using metrics such as monthly, quarterly, or yearly reporting creates accountability.

It is also important your board has a few bold or courageous leaders, less tolerant of performative speeches, or shy about governance or accountability.

World Domination

All patriarchal societies, whether existing across the globe or hundreds of years ago, share certain characteristics, which are not usually humility, stewardship, selflessness or sacrifice!!!

As of 2023, there are 23 female heads of state and 12 female heads of government globally.?This figure includes presidents, prime ministers, and other heads of state.

This represents a small percentage of the 195 countries in the world.

Only 14% of the world's leaders are women!!!!!

I can't even imagine the amount of undermining and stress you must have to tolerate if one of those 23 women.....

Not to mention feeling extremely lonely or isolated!!!

Unfortunately, world systems are characterised by male centrality and supremacy, where women are often relegated to subordinate roles.

Historically, war has largely been an enterprise carried out by men, further perpetuated by societal expectations of masculinity.

On the other hand, societies with more gender equality, where there are diverse decision-making bodies, are less likely to resort to violence.?

This demonstrates that a broader representation of genders in leadership roles could potentially lead to more peaceful conflict resolution strategies, enhancing outcomes.

Smashing the patriarchy

In a social system in which power and authority are predominantly held by men.

We must ponder the impact of the narcissistic boss or leader in fostering a more nuanced conversation to ensure diverse perspectives are included, especially in decision-making processes or leadership

The practice of placing a masculine point of view at the centre of one's worldview, culture, and history, consciously or unconsciously.

Is still reflected in various spheres such as education, literature, the arts, language and business.

It's important to note that not all men have narcissistic behaviour types, patterns or ways of thinking. There are also instances of male allyship and compassionate leadership.

If you are currently working closely with a narcissistic boss or leader, it is important firstly to protect your mental health and well-being and not to get consumed by such behaviours.

But, the challenge still lies in smashing the patriarchy.

If you have been impacted by this discussion and recognise 2023 has left you feeling fatigued, burned out, or emotionally exhausted. Let's connect here

Sister's we are not crazy!

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