Small talk and chit chat

For the last 12 months we have all been locked away, working in our bubbles and working from home, doing MS Teams, Google Video and Zoom meetings, morning, noon and night. We have learnt so many new skills, new software, new ways of working but have we lost the ability for ‘small talk, just having a chat’?

We have lost the opportunity of grabbing a coffee, meeting for lunch, going for a drink after work. Gone are the days of having those 10 or 15 minutes before a meeting or after, having that social time, that “get to know you time”, casually chatting with colleagues. These days to a large degree we have lost this important socialising, interaction with work colleagues. We no longer have any warm- up time or wind-down time after a meeting, it is all business. On a video call we log on just before or are held in a holding pattern till the host lets us in, then its straight down to the nitty gritty, straight down to business. When it is over, the call ends for everyone.

So, have we lost or are we losing the art of the social chit chat, that softer get to know you, get to know me, that social interaction? Historically it was always that special, personal connection that made the big difference. Are we about to lose that ‘je ne sais quoi’ that special little something, we have learnt or found in all those 5 or 10 minute little chit chats we use to have before or after meetings, at the water cooler, while grabbing a coffee.  Are they gone forever?

These days, some people prefer the almost clinical on and off style communication via video and part of me understands that it’s become a habit. They may have Zoom fatigue with all the back-to-back meetings, morning, noon and night and if they get 5, 10 or even 15 minutes they would sooner spend it with their partner or their children or doing something at home that needs doing, instead of chit chatting with work colleagues; yes, part of me understands that.

But part of me resents it as well; we seem to have lost those impromptu chats and meetings before the main meeting. It was always a chance to get to know people better, it was often what made things interesting and if you like, greased the wheels of industry. It also helped greatly with the company culture, getting to know the people you are working with.

I know some people who have been onboarded over the last year and have a great deal less ‘stickiness’ towards the company and their new colleagues. Why, I hear you say, it is because they have simply not had the opportunity to get to know them properly or have only seen a couple of facets of them online, especially when they have not met them face to face. We don’t always gel with everyone we work in the same way, seeing people in person and chatting with them, seeing the full body language, this often has such a big effect. Just doing it on-line, we miss so many of the subtle nuances we gain, in on-going regular face to face environments.

So, how can we fix it?

Here are some things that can be done while we are still working ONLINE but can be used when we are back in the office as well.

1.      Ice breakers at the beginning of a call (when we all meet) – quick intro and a “what have you been doing at work, and at home”. It gives everyone a human view of you and of them for you as well.

2.      Arrange a zoom call occasion, specifically to discuss topics that everyone is likely to have an opinion on – that may not have a de facto answer.

3.      Arrange extra get-to-know-you zoom sessions between colleagues or departments – make them compulsory as part of the onboarding process and get senior people involved. When your boss is telling you off – you need to know if they are just joking or being deadly serious, it’s not good to laugh in the wrong place.

4.      Arrange structured time at the end of your zoom meetings to just chat.

 About the Author

Howard Longstaff has over 25 years of experience delivering people within the talent acquisition arena.

He has worked extensively across the UK, Europe, USA, Canada as well as in South America, Australia, and New Zealand.

Over the last 20 years he has specialised in two fundamental areas, although he often covers a wider remit due to his thirst and understanding of technology. The first area which he has a real passion for, building ‘Sales Teams’, pulling together the very best ‘A Players’ and creating something incredibly special for his clients.

To do that, he needs to have a clear understanding of what his client wants, so establishing clear communication with the client is paramount, understanding the nuances of what they are looking for and documenting this. Understanding the technology, the opportunity, and the growth potential all help to find the ‘right fit, first time’. He is one of the few head-hunters that is willing to guarantee his work, offering 12 months free replacement.

The second area he loves getting involved in, is the leadership team, the C-Suite, helping to get the balance right, cover the gaps in knowledge, skills and experience, working on the assumption that ‘No one is perfect, but a team can be’?

Howard is someone who thinks outside the box, has an eye for detail, but is perceptive, looking beyond the surface of just skills and experience. He wants to know and understand the candidate behaviour as well as the emotional intelligence, the motives that drive the candidates he interviews. He is looking for the best fit for his client but also looking to ensure it is a fit for the candidate as well.

In the last 25 years he has also built his own companies and opened offices in New Zealand, Los Angeles, New York and most recently several companies in London. Specialising in technology companies, he has delivered permanent resources across practically every department. This has predominantly been for technology start-ups (Enterprise Software Co’s) but also for many leading management consulting and enterprise clients.

Howard is someone that uses technology to enhance the hiring process, to save time, money and effort and take the pain out of the process, but to find those ‘Exceptional People, who are so hard to find’. He operates a ‘Private Client Video Portal’ keeping everything together, the video, as well as psychrometric behavioural assessments on candidates and interviewing on an emotional intelligence level.  He has repeatedly built teams across three continents, so has a good breadth of knowledge across the talent acquisition arena.