The sky isn’t always blue. The sun doesn’t always shine. It’s okay to fall apart sometimes…
In my recent interaction with group of young people where I was trying to tell them the difference between being happy and being fulfilled, I asked them the question “Are you happy”? Most of them said that they feel stagnant in their current workplace and see them going nowhere. This led me thinking that in the journey of growth, there are times when we grow and excel. We are endlessly driven and hyped up, motivated to get our goals. Then there are times when we stagnate. We feel uninspired and unmotivated. We keep procrastinating on our plans. More often than not, we get out of a rut, only to get back into another one.
How do you know if you are stagnating? Here are some tell-tale signs:
§ If you have been experiencing chronic procrastination on your goals
§ If you don’t ever feel like doing anything
§ If you know you should be doing something, but yet you keep avoiding it
§ If you have a deep sense of feeling that you are living under your potential
When we face stagnation in life, it’s a sign of deeper issues. Stagnation, just like procrastination, is a symptom of a problem. It’s easy to beat ourselves over it, but this approach is not going to help. Here are steps to help you move out of this stagnation. They won’t magically transform your life in a night but they will help you get the momentum going and help you get back on track.
Realize you’re not alone. Everyone stagnates at some point or another. You are not alone in this and more importantly, it’s normal. In fact, it’s amazing how many of us actually face the same predicament, even though all of them come from different walks of life, are of different ages, and have never crossed paths. Realizing you are not alone in this will make it much easier to deal with this period. By trying to “fight it”, you’re only fighting yourself. Accept this situation, acknowledge it, and tell yourself it’s okay. That way, you can then focus on the constructive steps that will really help you.
Find what inspires you. Stagnation comes because there isn’t anything that excites you enough to take action. If you don’t have a habit of setting goals, and instead just leave yourself to daily mundane, it’s not surprising you are experiencing stagnation. What do you want to do if there are no limitations? If you can have whatever you want, what will it be? The answers to these questions will provide the fuel that will drive you forward.
On the other hand, even if you are an experienced goal setter, there are times when the goals you set in the past lose their appeal now. It’s normal and it happens to me too. Sometimes we lose touch with our goals, since we are in a different emotional state compared to when we first set them. Sometimes our priorities change and we no longer want to work on those goals anymore. However, we don’t consciously realize this, and what happens is we procrastinate on our goals until it compounds into a serious problem. If that’s the case for you, it’s time to relook into your goals. There’s no point in pursuing goals that no longer inspire you. Trash away your old goals and ask yourself what you really want now. Then go for them.
Give yourself a break. When’s the last time you took a real break for yourself? Prolonged working can cause someone to become disillusioned as they lose sight of who they are and what they want. Go on a trip elsewhere and get away from your work and your life. Use this chance to get a renewed perspective of life. Think about your life purpose, what you want and what you want to create for your life in the future. These are big questions that require deep thinking over them. It’s not about finding the answers at one go, but about taking the first step to finding the answers.
Shake up your routines. Being in the same environment, doing the same things over and over again and meeting the same people can make us stagnant. This is especially if the people you spend the most time with are stagnant themselves. Change things around. The different contexts will give you different stimulus, which will trigger off different thoughts and actions in you.
Start with a small step. Stagnation also comes from being frozen in fear. Maybe you do want this certain goal, but you aren’t taking action. Are you overwhelmed by the amount of work needed? Are you afraid you will make mistakes? Is the perfectionist in you taking over and paralyzing you? I notice so many people putting pressure on themselves, especially in their jobs. Yes, work hard. Yes, shoot for the moon and become who you dream you can be. But when it comes to just feeling like you’re making progress on a given day, recognize that you don’t actually have to go to great lengths to accomplish that. If you feel stagnant at work, you don’t have to get a new job tomorrow or a new career next week. Just ask yourself: What do I need to do today, outside of work, to feel like I’ve accomplished something in my life? Let go of the belief that it has to be perfect. Such a belief is a bane, not a boon. It’s precisely from being open to mistakes and errors that you move forward. Break down what’s before you into small steps, then take those small steps, a little step at a time. I had a colleague who had been stagnating for a long period because he was afraid of failing. He didn’t want to make another move where he would make a mistake. However, not wanting to make a mistake has led him to do absolutely nothing for few years. On the other hand, by doing just something, you would already be making progress, whether it’s a mistake or not. Even if you make a supposed “mistake”, you get feedback to do things differently in the next step. That’s something you would never have known if you never made a move.