Skills for Success - Learning to Listen

Active Listening

I often get asked what skills candidates should have in order to be successful at Meltwater so last month I wrote a short article about one of those skills; teachability (you can read it: here)

This time I want to focus on another skill that I feel is a key skill for success, but a skill that also helps you to be more teachable. This skill is active listening. 

Listening sounds like something passive so what exactly is active listening?

“'Active listening' means, as its name suggests, actively listening. That is fully concentrating on what is being said rather than just passively ‘hearing’ the message of the speaker”. Active listening is about building rapport, understanding, and trust.

If you’ve ever eaves dropped in a conversation, you would have probably noticed that most people who are listening are just waiting for their turn to speak. We often do this rather than focusing on what the other person is saying, and taking that in before speaking ourselves. 

You could also say that there are two different types of listening: “listening to understand” and “listening to respond.”

Why is listening so important?

It’s the most important component of interpersonal communication. Whether it’s listening to your colleague when they give you feedback, listening to your potential client explaining what their painpoints are, or listening to your partner talk about their day; actively listening and trying to understand what the person is saying will not only improve the conversation (and potential sale), but also the quality of your relationships with other people.

With better listening skills you can become more productive, and more persuasive. You can improve your negotiating skills and avoid conflict that often comes from misunderstandings (due to miscommunication).

Below offers some techniques that can help you focus when listening but also demonstrate to the speaker that you are actively listening;

• Pay attention and look at the speaker directly (put your phone, computer, and other distractions away)
• Use nonverbal cues which show understanding such as nodding, eye contact, and leaning forward
• Give positive feedback and little prompts to the speaker with brief verbal affirmations like “I see,” “I know,” “Sure,” “And then” to make them aware that you are listening
• Focus on what is being said (picture the situation that is being talked about if that helps) and don’t plan your response while the other person is talking
• Paraphrase to show understanding (and also to ensure you are paying attention)
• Ask questions and seek clarification but don’t interrupt (wait for a pause)
• Be open minded (don’t judge or jump to conclusions right away)

It's true that some people are naturally better listeners than others, however, it's definitely a skill that can be learnt and developed with time. We all know someone who is a great listener and we love communicating with those people as they are easy to open up to. Imagine how great it would be if you were that person?

It can be hard at the beginning to resist the urge to speak when someone is talking about something that also happened to you or reminded you of something else. However, it’s definitely worth working on your active listening skills, as it will not only improve your relationships both within work and outside of work, but you may also learn a whole lot more about the people you spend your time with!