Sir, I am not well!

It's 930 am which only the clock knows in the morning and we are still in bed and we may feel uncomfortable because of the late-night party or a mid-night movie etc or maybe for no reason we may need a small break for the day.

Suddenly in the midst of the half-sleep, we notice the bright sun behind the slit of the window screen to realize it’s too late to start and reach our office or school or any regular duty.

Our brain does simple mathematics with leave balance and just calls the manager, if not just message the manager “Sir, I am not well, Request for a leave today “.

The manager also more often realizes, understands, and approves the leave as long as no criticality is there. Probably it resembled a “Deja Vu” of his or her last week to his/her manager.

This may be normal and routine in many formats and contexts of our life. The worst of the format we might have experienced is not-picking up calls or not-responding to messages for certain situations.

It could be a leave application, or failing to attend an interview at the last minute by saying my grandmother is not well or personally met with an accident.

The world and our life are tuned to these responses of giving excuses which we assume the others to understand the hidden intent of the reasons. On one side it’s very normal at the macro level.

Not to be so judgmental about individuals on this, Maybe it's time to look at these responses as failure to take & accept the responsibility of one’s own situation or mistakes or errors as a dangerous sign which may leave a dent in a progressive society in terms of integrity.

Let me rephrase this question in a different way.

One side, If we cannot even have the guts to take responsibility for our decision of not willing to attend the interview or take the responsibility of why the leave without the silly reasons how as a society we will own up bigger responsibility for the purpose.

On the other side accepting reality, appreciating, and recognizing true reasons also needs guts and responsibility.

People tend to sell what is easily sold in the market. “I am not well” and the likes of it are easy to sell and so people sell it or maybe told it more often.

I personally recollect days in the midst of the classroom I raise my hands and said “I cannot focus on class for some reason I don’t know, May I leave “.

The faculty without ego said “Please go ahead” and more importantly he welcomed me to the next class without the traces of the past. To his surprise, later I was the topper in the same subject all the trimesters.

Can I do it for all the faculties or all stakeholders? Not sure.

I also recollect one more final year exam of mine where the exam time was 2.5 hours and I couldn’t write more than 30 minutes. I submitted the paper, requested early leaving. The faculty refused and warned me. I still requested and said I am not well and moved with apologies. But I was penalized as it was seen as non-adherence to respect benchmarks rather than appreciation of the reality.

I am not saying one is right and the other is wrong. The same can be projected as “Be a Roman when you are in Rome” or smart communication and we may keep ignoring it.

But if we fail to see the gap of owning up the responsibility for our failures or actions in such small instances, I am sure we as a collective society may miss out on something big or already missing or missed for a larger purpose.

So the next time if we are tempted to say “I am not well” or the likes of it can we try to communicate the reality and wait to face the consequences.

Let’s try!

As a society do we still want to be “Not Well”?

May be through this small change “We can be better”

Prabhu Swaminathan

Life & Leadership Coach (Founder AFMOI-India)

www.prabhuswaminathan.in | www.afmoi.in