Single Your 60s? Nothing Happens Unless You Go Out And Date

If you’re single in your 60s you may be wondering if there’s a chance for you. Clients who are serious about finding love come to SuccessMatch from all over the world and at all ages.

When they join my program, they commit to do the work necessary to develop the awareness and skills to be able to successfully Be, Find and Choose the right partner. My program is designed to help you grow as a person and in your love life, and some aspects of the program will likely challenge you.

But it’s through these challenges that a transformation occurs and I’ve seen many singles leave the program with not only amazing partners and the lives they had always dreamt of but also with a new demeanor and way about them.

And if for whatever reason the relationship a client is in when they leave the program doesn’t work out, then they already have the skills and tools to create a new one.

Lena was looking for love at 64

I recently had a Swedish client, Lena, who had just turned 64 and was thrilled to join the program. She’d heard of my program and had decided she was prepared to do whatever it took to find love. After all, it had been years since her divorce and her daughter was now attending university in Germany.

As she began the program it was clear that she was certainly a bit of a tough cookie, but she was willing to invest and really did a great job showing up for and participating in all of the coaching sessions.

When it came to actually taking action, she turned out to be quite an over-thinker. She was constantly dragging her feet with, ‘‘What if…?’’ questions and no matter how many ways there were to complete a task she was unable to actually DO it.

Sometimes the best way to overcome analysis paralysis is to just do something… even if it’s a baby step.

At first me and my team were wondering if we’d made a mistake accepting her into the program. We really pride ourselves on choosing clients who we know are committed to taking action. While Lena said she was committed, her actions showed otherwise, at first.

How fear is holding you back in dating

We quickly found her stuck in a pattern of constant doubt whenever we shared what she needed to do.

‘‘Oh I can't do that!’’

‘‘This isn’t for me.’’

‘‘I am too old.’’

‘‘Men are not interested in successful women.’’

‘‘I'm too busy that day.’’

In Lena’s group everyone had to be dating on an app by Christmas. She kept putting it off and by early December she wrote it off all together. She explained that her daughter would be visiting from Germany and so she would be too busy. She continued with more excuses as to why she didn’t really see joining a dating app at all.

‘‘I don't think I want to be on an app, I'm too discreet.’’

‘‘There are serious risks with joining a dating app.’’

‘‘It is just not me, this is really going against my grain.”

Eventually her daughter left and while she was still where she had been in November, everyone in her group was dating online, some had already even made serious connections. She recognized that she was falling behind but she then still didn’t have time, she claimed, she was?way too busy at work.

This went on and on but after quite a bit of coaching and with just two months to go in the program she finally decided that she would be okay with trying Bumble. If you’re single in your 60s, this app might be what you’re looking for.?Bumble is an online dating app where the woman makes the first step in matching.

While she had agreed to start, she explained that?it would be impossible to do so right away?because she didn’t have any photos that she could use in her profile.

I suggested she send me what she had, and I would take a look. I told her to get started with two of the photos that she already had and then she could take more photos to eventually add.

She made an appointment for photos but there was a snowstorm, so she had to postpone, and so more time went by. She told me that she loved the photo experience but then she got the photos back and hated it and felt that the makeup just wasn’t?‘her.’

By this time, we were nearing the end of the program and she still hadn’t started dating. She finally used some of the pictures that had been edited by the photographer and she started her Bumble account. She began to use the app but realized that she had accidentally put the wrong age -- 63 instead of 64 -- and she panicked. She was adamant about having the correct information from the start.

I told her to close and start over, but she didn't want to lose the 20 men she had already matched with. She instead contacted Bumble customer service to change it but was unable to get in touch. She decided that it was a terrible app and even proceeded to give it a bad review. Weeks went by and she finally got a response from Bumble and was able to fix her account.

Love is outside of your comfort zone

The first person she matched with was a Norwegian man who she really connected with. Even though she had dragged her feet when taking action, she had participated in the rest of the program and already had all the tools. For her it was just about getting started and once she did, she had a lot of success.

They both loved the outdoors and went on an adventurous weekend date.

She contacted me to let me know she was concerned about their different types of careers, and I told her to focus on all of the incredible things they had in common.

She only started dating a few weeks before the program ended, and it literally took her months?to start actually dating but she’s now ‘‘totally in love’’ with the man of her dreams. Their relationship is going very well and now her upcoming retirement looks completely different now that she has a partner to share it with.

She was completely resistant to change but once she finally gave in her transformation was remarkable.

She even looks different. My colleague mentioned to me that she looks like a completely different person and seems?softer?and?happier?now that she has found love.

Single in your 60s? Time to take action

I love this story because it's a great example of how so often success is right outside your comfort zone.?Her right match was her first match. If this 64-year-old woman resistant to everything was finally able to find love, so can you if you’re willing to take action.

Are you getting in your own way when it comes to finding love? Find out by?clicking here for exclusive access?to my free Masterclass, “Why are you still single?”