Simple ways to stay strong and calm during these turbulent times (It’s time to get back to basics)

A lot of people I spoke with over the last two weeks reported feeling stressed. Some even reported feeling a vague sense of gloom and purposelessness that they couldn’t fathom. Now, there is a name to this feeling. NYTimes calls it languishing – the absence of well-being!

With lockdowns and work from home dragging on, many people are feeling the loss of control and are struggling with the emotional long- haul of the pandemic. News cycles aren’t helping either.

A question - in this second wave of COVID-19, which tactics are you turning to cope with stress? Are you even trying? While all of us are not frontline responders, we too have a duty to help ourselves and those around us to reduce stress and ultimately protect our wellbeing to the extent possible.

Today I want to share with you how we can create a better world for ourselves and those around us, drawing upon some age-old wisdom and from researching the current experience of psychologists grappling with the aftermath of the pandemic.

And where do we start? With ourselves, of course! 

The manner of self-care you practice doesn’t matter. What matters is that you practice something at all. Which coping tactics can you turn to when your usual ones no longer seem to work? I will cover this over a series of posts based on what is working for me.

The key is in training your mind and organizing your life not taking every monkey on your back!

I want to begin by sharing one of my favorite quotes!

“Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle. Some things are within your control. And some (most? ) are not.” - Epictetus

Many renowned authors and trainers including Stephen Covey of the famous ‘Seven Habits of Highly Effective People' have talked about this. But how can you apply this in your life?

1. Begin with actually making a list of everything that worries you for a day or two. Seriously! Keep listing and listing.  
2. The next step is to highlight the things that you can control or influence like your physical health, mental wellbeing, your career and so on. We will work with them in a moment.
3. But first, let go of the ones you can't influence. You will find a lot of them in that list for sure. If your mind comes back to these non-controllable things, tell it gently not to bother with them. I literally tell myself aloud, “Sorry buddy, don't bother. You don’t want that monkey too on your back.” You too can adopt a coping technique that works for you.
4. Now let’s start working within your area of control! Let’s look at what we can control – ourselves!

So, what actions can you take to improve those factors in your control?!

1. Exercise, start small 5k steps a day inside your house. I walk around and I bounce a softball off the wall during calls where I don’t need to keep the video on. Any exercise releases endorphins to help you feel better and gives you a sense of accomplishment that surpasses none other.
2. Check-in with your loved ones and colleagues (sharing helps both the listener and sharer). You will be surprised at how receptive people are at having a non-work call. Schedule one with your team, ex-colleagues, old friends, and others. Now is a great time to reach out and ask about someone’s well-being without wondering about what they will think of you.
3. Be kind to everyone (so much needed today! Thank others often and praise profusely, I will talk more about this in the future. In today’s situation, you never know the difference one kind word can make to someone’s life and yours!
4. Although it's normal to want to stay up to date on COVID-19 and health tips, continuously watching news alerts can exacerbate any anxiety and stress. Stick to a few reliable sources and check them only a few times a day.
5. A buffer between work and the rest of your life at the end of the day. the commute from work back home used to help me compartmentalize both aspects fo my life. Now I keep the phone aside and unwind by doing some goofy thing works like playing with a remote control car for a bit and read a few pages. This helps and I am ready to give my 100% to my family.
6. Sleep is something most of us do not pay much attention to! It not only helps your body and mind to rest, but it also allows your body to regenerate muscles and clear toxic wastes from your brain. Sleep is also essential for emotional regulation. In reality, even one night of sleep deprivation will increase your emotional response to negative feelings by more than 50%. This can have a significant impact on how you deal with situations during the pandemic. Here’s a beautifully written and insightful article about sleep from the experts themselves.

If you choose the things that make you feel better about yourself and your world, you will be creating a positive environment around you that is so much needed now. There’s a science behind this - that your thoughts, words, actions, choices, attitude, and reactions, create your environment.

A positive environment will mean that we are better placed to overcome this massive challenge – and we will surely overcome it – together!

After all, it’s up to all of us to take care of those we care about and for that, we need to start by taking care of ourselves!

Until next time…

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