A simple tool to help manage overwhelm and stressful situations.

Over the past few weeks, many of my coaching clients, and individuals in the organisations I work with, have spoken about overwhelm, burnout and tiredness.  Burnout and tiredness from the continuing lockdowns, restrictions and the implications they have on their lives.  

Our resilience has been tested like never before.  We are constantly called upon to dive deep within us to find the willpower, stamina and motivation to keep going in a situation none of us have had to experience before. 

Thankfully, there are some fantastic tools which I use with clients and groups to support them through this. 

One tool which I regularly use with clients, deliver in workshops and use myself is the CIA model – Control, Influence, Accept.*  

In every situation in life, there are things we can control, things we can influence and things we need to accept.  Often, we spend our time and energy focusing on the elements of the situation or event that we need to accept.  However, we would benefit more from focusing our time and energy on the elements we can control or influence.  

Taken Covid-19 as an example.  Quite often we find ourselves focusing on the elements we possibly need to accept.  Some examples include;

What do we need to Accept?

?       The actions of others

?       The impact on the economy

?       Predicting what will happen and when 

?       Questioning how long this will last for

We may, however, benefit from shifting our focus away from the things we need to accept to the elements we can control and influence.  For example,

What can we Control?

?       My behaviour and my actions 

?       My outlook and my decisions

?       How I follow the guidelines

?       Limiting my social media and turning off the news 

What can we Influence? 

?       Following the guidelines within my home environment 

?       The outlook and mood of my family and my friends

?       How the situation is interpreted in my household

?       How my children follow the guidelines

This tool can be used in all elements of our life.  I find it a great way to step back from stressful situations, take stock and focus my energy and time on the elements which will ultimately benefit me.  

Why not use the template and give it a go yourself?  Think about a situation or event that is causing you overwhelm, anxiety, stress and use the tool to list what you can control, influence and accept. 

If you have any questions on this, please do reach out to me.  I’m always happy to chat! 

If you feel like you would benefit from one to one coaching, I offer a free 30 minute exploratory call to explain more about what I do and how I may help you. 

*Derived from Stephen Covey’s ‘Circle of Concern & Influence’ model from his book “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” (1989)