A simple question can transform your relationship with your team and colleagues...

In today's dispersed-but-yet-interconnected world, it's easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of frustrations and challenges we face on a daily basis. It's easy to sit in your home office, alone, and mentally build up what would usually be minor things. We often find solace in sharing our experiences with others, seeking empathy, advice, or simply a listening ear. Recently, I had an enlightening encounter with a peer that made me realise the importance of having a rant, but with purpose. This experience taught me a valuable lesson about the power of active listening and how it can positively impact our relationships and productivity.

A simple question posed by my peer completely changed my perspective on ranting. Instead of mindlessly venting, she asked me whether I wanted to be heard, [virtually] hugged, or helped.

"Do you want to be heard, hugged, or helped?"

This question forced me to pause and reflect on my intentions behind the rant. It made me realise that there are different reasons for seeking support and that being aware of these reasons can lead to more meaningful conversations.

Armed with this newfound insight, I have decided to apply the concept with my own teams. I continue to actively listen to their concerns, frustrations, and challenges, but without immediately offering solutions or advice. By providing a safe space for them to express themselves, I have noticed that they have become more engaged and empowered. Knowing that their voices are heard and their emotions acknowledged.

The gamechanger is having a clear objective in mind when sharing our frustrations. It's important to acknowledge up front whether we're seeking emotional support, a hug to uplift our spirits, or tangible solutions to overcome obstacles. By understanding our needs upfront, we can guide the conversation in a direction that aligns with our intention, ensuring a more fruitful outcome.

When we engage in purposeful ranting, we create an environment of trust and collaboration. We encourage open communication, empathy, and understanding within our teams. We already know that active listening helps foster stronger connections and enhances teamwork, ultimately leading to increased productivity and individual satisfaction.

Through this experience, I've learned that as leaders and colleagues, it's crucial to empower others to find their own solutions. Sometimes, all people need is a listening ear to process their thoughts and emotions. Providing that space without rushing to offer advice or quick fixes, enables individuals to discover their strengths, develop problem-solving skills, along with personal and professional growth.