A Simmering Pan of Anxiety

I like metaphors, in fact, I would say that I’m not alone in liking and using metaphors. I use them in the therapy room frequently, using Russian dolls to explore identity, family and connection. But I often use words and metaphors to express and explore my own and others' experiences. Imagery can be so powerful. Sometimes a picture or reference to a familiar object can help us understand what is happening in our lives and within ourselves.

Over the last few months we at Golden Tree CIC and myself within my therapy practice have been dealing with an increase in anxiety and it’s no surprise.  We have pressures on our physical, mental, social and financial health.  Yet for the most part we are coping, managing...simmering along just like that pan but it doesn’t take much for the heat to be turned up and then the hot liquid bubbling away begins to boil and spit - scalding anyone too close to the pan. That can be just like anxiety, as within the turmoil we can spit our anger over those closest to us, leaving them distressed and ourselves full of guilt and shame.

Now this is just one way our anxiety can manifest and the simmering pan is a great metaphor to explore this. Taking this a step further, have you ever put a lid on a pan on the stove? I have and the pot boils more quickly and then ends up spilling the pan’s contents all over the cooker top! So what’s this blog about? Well it’s about attending to our emotions. It’s about noticing what we are experiencing and being curious as to why we are experiencing it. Just as we need to attend to what’s in the pan we need to think about the heat and ways to turn down that heat. 

Therapy can help, a deep level of understanding of where our anxieties stem from and ways that we can learn new and different ways of being. When I’m dealing with people in therapy who are anxious, I’ll very often start with a little bit of ‘psycho-education’ with my client exploring some of the basic signs and symptoms of anxiety and the fight, flight or freeze response that we all can experience at times. We then explore how those feelings of anxiety are expressed and then some practical tools and techniques to manage those feelings.

More and more I’m talking to people, both in the training room and therapy room about mindfulness and meditation.  I trained as a meditation instructor about 8 years ago with the British School of Meditation and I have since that time endeavoured to build meditation practice into my daily life (if I’m honest that hasn’t always been easy and at times my practice has been intermittent as it seemed ‘life’ would get in the way, but I miss it when I don’t do it and I feel the difference when I do). It is without a doubt one of the most important tools in my canon of managing stress and anxiety. 

Meditation is simple but not necessarily easy to do, it takes practice, after all that's what it’s called. We did a series of guided meditations on our facebook page for a number of weeks during lockdown and we’ll be doing some more over the coming months. Check them out. Each of the sessions lasts for about 30 minutes and as the Zen adage says, if you can’t find the time to meditate for 30 minutes...meditate for an hour.

Thanks for reading.