Silence the Judge with Positive Intelligence

Becoming a CEO requires decades of education, commitment, sweat, and tears. Despite the undeniable competency and all the investment into joining the C-suite, CEOs report higher rates of insecurity than professionals at the beginning of their careers.

“Notably, the data shows that employees across all titles and compensation levels are struggling with feelings of doubt at work. Interestingly, senior management, including CEOs (71%) and other senior executives (65%) are more likely than early-stage professionals (33%) to exhibit signs of imposter syndrome.”

This data is based on a Korn Ferry survey of about 400 executives.

This is due, in part, to the fact that being a CEO has never been harder.

“The Covid-19 pandemic intensified long-standing challenges for C-suite executives, and even four years later, leaders are struggling to cope with the colossal change it brought to the workplace. The additional workload, plus trying to keep up with a rapidly changing business landscape, has weighed on leaders.”

This has led to burnout and high rates of turnover.

My mission is to contribute to the health, happiness, and success of all leaders, particularly CEOs of small to mid-size businesses. The best way I’ve found to combat imposter syndrome and increase well-being is Positive Intelligence .

POSITIVE INTELLIGENCE

Positive Intelligence is a program created by Shirzad Chamine . It’s based on recognizing that invisible mental habits and behaviors subtly yet significantly sabotage our success. These saboteurs hijack the mind and prevent us from achieving our full potential for both success and happiness.

“Positive Intelligence is ultimately about action and results. Its tools and techniques are a synthesis of the best practices in neuroscience, performance science, positive psychology and cognitive psychology.” Shirzad Chamine.

For a more in-depth explanation of my experience with positive intelligence, see this article.

MASTER SABOTEUR: THE JUDGE

“Our minds are often our worst enemies; the mind harbors characters that actively sabatoge our happiness and success. These saboteurs can easily be identified and weakened.” Shirzad Chamine.

There are ten saboteurs, and the judge is the one everyone suffers from.

Over the past few years, in various settings, I have asked hundreds of CEOs and leaders to write a secret—something they have never shared—about how they really feel inside. They anonymously write their answers on 3-5 cards and turn them in. I’ve received every type of answer you can imagine because even though they are secret, they are universally shared feelings, almost without exception.

I’ve selected some of the statements to help illustrate the insidious nature of The Judge when unrecognized and unchecked.

Statement 1: "I'm afraid that I have failed as a father, and I worry about how I'm going to make up for it."

Statement 2: "I'm constantly judging everyone around me, and I want to stop. I feel lonely all the time."

Statement 3: "I battle with constantly ranking and judging everyone around me in all settings, all the time."

Explanation: The Judge is perhaps the most pervasive and destructive saboteur, constantly criticizing oneself and others. In these statements we can identify the CEO's fear of failure as a father is likely driven by the Judge and amplifies self-doubt and guilt. The Judge not only criticizes oneself but also others, as seen in the other statements. These judgments lead to a sense of isolation and loneliness as they create barriers in relationships.

CHARACTERISTICS & IMPACTS

The statements above are classic examples of how the Judge Saboteur has a mental habit of constant self-criticism, criticism of others, and criticism of circumstances. The Judge undermines confidence, creates stress, and strains relationships.

When The Judge Saboteur is focused on SELF-JUDGEMENT, it creates an intense inner critic that constantly devalues your actions and abilities. This creates feelings of GUILT & SHAME over perceived shortcomings or mistakes, which can lead to PERFECTIONISM and setting unrealistically high standards.

When The Judge Saboteur is focused on JUDGING OTHERS, your outlook is more critical, and you find faults in others, often leading to strained relationships and conflict. At the same time, this focus on others leads to COMPARISON, fostering feelings of inadequacy. ISOLATION results from constantly judging others, creating a barrier to forming genuine connections.

When The Judge Saboteur is focused on JUDGING CIRCUMSTANCES, you will undoubtedly amplify negative aspects of situations, making them seem worse than they are. This leads to feelings of HELPLESSNESS and frustration when things don’t go as planned and increases the odds that you will BLAME external circumstances for personal and professional problems.

There are several consequences as a result of these judgments:

1. On Self-Image

• Low Self-Esteem: Erodes self-esteem and self-worth by constantly highlighting personal flaws and failures.
• Paralysis by Analysis: Causes overthinking and procrastination due to fear of judgment and failure.

2. On Relationships

• Strained Interactions: Creates tension and unresolved conflicts in relationships due to constant criticism.
• Loneliness: Leads to loneliness and isolation, as others may withdraw to avoid being judged.

3. On Performance

• Reduced Effectiveness: Diverts mental energy from productive tasks to self-critical thoughts.
• Stress and Anxiety: Increases stress and anxiety, diminishing overall performance and decision-making abilities.

4. On Leadership

• Reduced Effectiveness: Diverts mental energy from productive tasks to self-critical thoughts.
• Stress and Anxiety: Increases stress and anxiety, diminishing overall performance and decision-making abilities.

AT WORK

The impact of the Judge Saboteur on a leader can be profound and far-reaching, particularly on employees and direct reports. When a leader is under the influence of the Judge Saboteur, it can create a toxic work environment that affects team morale, productivity, and overall organizational health. Here's a detailed overview of the potential impacts:

1. Culture of Fear and Anxiety

Impact:

• Increased Stress: Employees and direct reports may constantly feel stressed and anxious, fearing criticism and judgment for their performance.
• Inhibited Innovation: Fear of being judged or making mistakes can stifle creativity and innovation. Employees are less likely to propose new ideas or take risks.

Example: A team member might refrain from suggesting a novel approach to a project, believing their idea will be dismissed or harshly criticized by the leader.

2. Decreased Morale and Motivation

Impact:

• Low Morale: Constant negativity and criticism can lead to a decline in morale, making employees feel undervalued and demotivated.
• Reduced Engagement: When employees feel judged rather than supported, they are less likely to be engaged and committed to their work and the organization.

Example: Regularly receiving negative feedback without recognition of their efforts may cause a high-performing employee to lose motivation and become disengaged.

3. Deterioration of Trust and Relationships

Impact:

• Lack of Trust: Employees may find it difficult to trust a leader constantly judging them. This lack of trust can erode team cohesion and collaboration.
• Poor Relationships: Persistent judgmental behavior can lead to strained relationships, creating a sense of isolation and disconnection within the team.

Example: Employees may hesitate to approach their leader with concerns or feedback, fearing judgment rather than constructive support.

4. High Turnover Rates

Impact:

• Employee Turnover: High-stress levels, low morale, and poor relationships can increase employee turnover. Talented employees may leave for a more supportive and positive work environment.

Example: A valued team member might leave the company because they feel constantly criticized and unappreciated, seeking a workplace where they feel more supported and valued.

5. Poor Decision-Making and Problem-Solving

Impact:

Reduced Input: Employees may avoid contributing to decision-making processes, fearing their suggestions will be judged harshly.

Ineffective Problem-Solving: A judgmental atmosphere can prevent open and honest communication, leading to ineffective problem-solving and a lack of innovative solutions.

Example: During a team meeting, employees might remain silent when their input is needed, resulting in suboptimal decisions due to a lack of diverse perspectives.

DEFY THE JUDGE!

The most effective strategy for counteracting saboteurs is to develop your SAGE. This is how you minimize the Judge Saboteur’s negative impact on you and in your business.

Specifically, for the Judge Saboteur, you must CULTIVATE SELF-AWARENESS. Only then will you recognize when Judge Saboteur influences your thoughts and actions.

Sage Step 1: Catch the Judge

Notice when the Judge is present and say to yourself, “That’s the Judge!”

Sage Step 2: Celebrate

Celebrate for 10 seconds - this releases dopamine, energizes the Sage brain, and shifts you from negative to positive energy.

While the Judge Saboteur will resist celebrations, it’s an incredibly effective tool for shifting your mentality from what’s wrong (in me, others, around me) to what’s right. And that is the key to feeling confident and happy as a CEO.

Thank You!

This newsletter is possible because of the engagement and support of readers like you. I deeply respect your time and trust, and thank you for being here. Here’s to continuing on this transformative journey and unlocking the true potential within us all!

Mark Taylor

Where Manhattan CEOs Go to Grow

Vistage NYC

Direct: 212.867.5849

www.marktaylor.nyc

Learn about the Power of Triads in my TEDx Talk