Showing up as a leader people want to follow

People are more willing to listen to a leader that shows up as genuine and builds a meaningful connection with them.?? As you think about the leaders that you respect, they inspire confidence in the direction they are taking the team.?? In the book?Own the Room, the authors describe leadership presence as “the ability to consistently and clearly articulate your value proposition while influencing and connecting with others”1.? All words and actions of a leader influence the degree of commitment the team is willing to make.

There is a big difference between wanting to follow someone as your leader and being obligated to follow.? Being relatable will gain more followership than bravado and trying to dominate.? My dad, who had a genuine leadership presence based largely on mutual respect, came home from work one day telling me how frustrated he was with his new boss.? His boss told him he could increase his executive presence by doing things like raising his chair to be higher than the other chairs in the room so that he would have greater command of the people.? My dad had no interest in being in “command” of them.? If the only way to get people to follow you is by increasing the height of your chair, leveraging your title, dropping names, demeaning others, or flaunting your credentials – you are not a leader.? Superficial leadership destroys trust, confidence, and commitment.?

Some leaders convey the substance and energy that engage the people they are talking with, while other leaders have the opposite effect.? Showing up as the leader that people really want to follow will generally have the following characteristics:

Personal connection:? Let people know that you care about them, believe in them and that they are the reason you are there.? This can be conveyed by an appropriate tone, eye contact, and body language that draw people into the discussion and creates a connection with them.? People are very perceptive and will pick up the subtle messages that you may not even realize you’re sending.? For example, if a leader spends more time looking at his phone than engaging with the people, that leader is signaling that the people there are not important.? Likewise, if the leader appears to be worried or concerned, the team will also wonder if they should be worried or concerned too.? Your whole being needs to be totally present with the people in the room.?

Keen awareness:?? Be aware of the energy of a group, and what raises or lowers it.? See how people react to what is being said?and ensure the reaction and energy level?is consistent with the message being delivered.??If people have a blank look or are not engaged, then you are probably not connecting with them, so be flexible and adjust your delivery or content.? Be able to redirect the discussion if it is getting off-track.? A significant learning opportunity for me happened at an employee meeting in Grand Forks; the people were distracted, and it became obvious that something specific was bothering them.? Twenty minutes into the meeting, I stopped talking about what I was there to discuss and asked what was on their mind.? This change of focus led to a robust discussion on a matter that was important to them and?in turn helped resolve some important outstanding issues.? The original content of the meeting would have fallen on deaf ears until the local issue was addressed.?

Sense of purpose:? Convey a confident resolve to achieve a positive outcome and yet at the same time a willingness to incorporate fresh ideas on the path to get there.? Communicate in an understandable manner that demonstrates a firm grasp of the goals as well as the obstacles and uncertainties that will get in the way of achieving it.?? People need to know that the leader is committed to see the objective all the way through and won’t bail out when the winds change direction.? At the same time, this quiet confidence provides the ability to value and listen to the ideas of others and obstacles that could get in the way - especially when they are not consistent with their own thoughts.

Enjoy being there:???Don’t be afraid to show your personality when you are with the team.? Get there early and/or stay beyond the end of the meeting.? Try to avoid getting down to business as soon as you get there and leaving the second it is over.? Ask questions and take the time to enjoy the people there and the stories that are told.? Put your phone away and talk with people in the room without constantly checking for text messages and email.?? The ability to listen, understand and connect before and after meetings help others see the real you and not just the business persona.? People want to know you are there because you want to be, not because you have to be.

Like most aspects of leadership, there is no “easy to apply formula” for leadership presence. ?It requires thinking about how others experience you and not worrying about the height of your chair.

?1Booth, David, et al.?Own the Room: Business Presentations That Persuade, Engage & Get Results. McGraw-Hill, 2010.

?“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” —?Maya Angelou (Pulitzer Prize-nominated author and poet)

?Leadership matters!

Ken