Should've, Could've, Would've

We all have childhood memories that impact us years later in life. Maybe a conversation with your mother, a game played with a friend, or a lesson taught by a grandfather. A meeting with my middle school teacher is one memory that truly stuck with me. He told me that one of the worst things you can say in life are “should’ve, could've, or would've.” Being in middle school, that advice didn’t seem to mean much at the time, but it stuck with me none the less.?

As I grew older, I learned that too often are we filled with fear, worry, and doubts that cripple us into making decisions that we deem to be “safer” or “more realistic.” Too often, we spend too much time pondering the worst-case scenario and fail to see what should’ve, could've, or would’ve been a great opportunity or a new experience. Admittedly, I have a lot of work to do when it comes to overcoming fears. My automatic response to new challenges is too often to doubt myself! However, I've discovered? a few tactics that help me overcome my fear when I'm facing a difficult decision.?

Look at the Positives

It's so easy to let our anxiety force us to focus only on the negative possibilities that we can wind up ignoring the positive possibilities altogether. Always remember to weigh the pros and the cons evenly to avoid getting buried in your negative thoughts!?

Revisit Your Past Accomplishments?

Remember the time you faced your fear, took a risk, and it turned out awesome? Take some time to dwell on those moments where you thought you wouldn’t make it, but you did. When you are in doubt, remember those unexpected victories – they could happen again!?

Seek Encouragement From Friends and Family

No one is rooting for you to fail. In fact, you are probably the only person that doubts your abilities! If you find yourself bogged down in negativity, true friends and family will help you look at things in a different perspective. Surround yourself with people that will help you talk through your worries and give you some honest advice to help you through this decision process!?

Realize That the Only Real Failure is Not Trying in the First Place

I am a firm believer in “what’s meant to be, will be.” If you try and fail – odds are, it's not the end of the world! It's always better to know that you tried and failed than to look back and realize that you never tried at all . Working through your fear and trying is an accomplishment in and of itself.?

The scariest risks in my life have led me to the greatest victories. I live in a new country. I have a dream job with the best people I've ever met. Many decisions that got me where I am today were scary, and I'm so thankful I made them. So don't set yourself up for regret because you're scared of what could happen. "Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."?