Should You Moderate Screen Time For Your Child During Pandemic?

Today we speak about something that affects every parent in this lockdown period i..e - How Do You Moderate Screen Time For Your Child During Pandemic?

I have a few questions for you first. Are you feeling confused on should you or should you not moderate your child’s screen time during this pandemic? Is it practical to keep the child away from screens during this time? And the biggest question here is – Is screen time really so bad for children?

Experts in this area stand divided in terms of the effect of screen time on the child’s cognitive, learning and socio-emotional skills. Well, to truly test the effect, we need to pick up a child, randomly, and make him or her increase the screen time and study the effect!! You see the challenge here!

However understanding basic things may not be such a big challenge as they have a scientific basis. Before we get started, please note - the word “screen time” that I use here is not a blanket word. It does not include situations when screen is being used as a device for educational purpose (online classes, tuitions, child referring to internet for school projects or information) or to connect with friends or families through video call. Even then I would advice to have a rule around self hygiene like bath, brush, meal and sleep before indulging in this.

Now I am going to share six basic concerns around the impact of screen time on a child and moderation suggestions.

Point 1: Screen time too close to sleep time

Our brain produces a hormone melatonin that helps circadian rhythm (our internal clock) and encourages sleep. It is released in the darkness and gets affected by the light of the devices. Thus a screen time close to bed time is going to affect the sleep patterns of the child.

Result: Poor sleep in turn affects the memory, learning and focus of the child as well as causes emotional challenges like irritability and low motivation.

Suggestion:  Have a rule of closing the devices one hour before the bed time. Turn the internet off. Have consequences for night time sneaks! Also have a fixed time of sleeping each day in a way that it takes care of 9 hours of sleep of the child.

Point 2: Screen time at the time of eating

Eating is a sensory experience. It including smelling, visual element, tasting, touching, and sensing the feeling of satiety and overall wellbeing. If more people are eating together, it also adds on the social element.

Result: Eating with devices robs away this experience. A big part of the brain goes into passive mode with screens and the physiological signals knocking at the doors go unheeded. This can lead to development of poor eating habits including over eating resulting in obesity. It also leads to poor choice of food by increasing exposure to high calorie and low on nutrients food.

Suggestion: Have a proper place for eating. Make it a screen free zone. Avoid giving food in the bed or while the child is having the classes. This helps to keep a loose structure of routine going for the child as well. It becomes all the more important during this lockdown period as the regular structure has been completely broken. Wherever possible try having a meal time together, maybe breakfast or dinner time for parents with office hours. A definite rule can be made for the weekends to eat together.

Point 3: Screen time for entertainment the first thing in the morning

Imagine what happens in your body when you get up. The brainwaves change from the sleep state to a state of wakefulness. It is actually the brain commanding the body into action through various signals and hormonal triggers. Sometimes even on a really cheerful day it could be difficult to pull oneself out of the bed.

Result: When a child gets into the mode of picking up a device the first thing in the morning, you are essentially setting your child on a very high level of reward train. Think it like giving chocolates and candies to the child the first thing in the morning. Later in the day it would become all the more difficult for the child not to feel drained and out of focus towards other activities which don’t give this quick fix of dopamine release but are essential for overall wellbeing like hygiene activities (making bed, taking bath), academics, or self care activities (exercise, food) or even social connect with family. We do no good to a child by giving an easy way out through screen device here. It is like circumventing the built up of self-driving capability of the child. Remember brain is a muscle with nerve connections and like any other muscle of the human body, if we don’t use a particular area; it is not bound to get developed or may get developed into a maladapted behavior.

Suggestion:  Have a rule of no screen based entertainment in the first four hours of waking up for your child.. Let the child go through the waking up process in a self driven mode figuring out how to plan the day and build his or her motivation to follow the plan with some high level instructions of to-do’s from you. This also helps the child to develop more responsible attitude towards screen time.

Remember, even if this is a restrictive phase of lockdown, raising your child is not a short term event. The habits and attitudes developed early on get etched much stronger at this phase.

Point 4: Screen time whenever getting bored

Imagine what is happening when a child gets into the habit of using screen time as a time cruncher. There is no end to it. Throughout the day our mind and body goes through several cycles of peaks and troughs. When a child starts feeling uncomfortable with the troughs part of the day, and seeks out for a quick device fix, we are setting a very wrong expectation in the child about overall outlook towards life.

Result: Instead of building life skills like frustration tolerance, flexibility and adaptability what takes precedence is Instant gratification and a strong urge to be in a state of continuous stimulation. Bad idea.

Being on screen in a highly engaged and interactive mode for a long time puts the child into a zone of hyper in alertness, activity and anxiety.

Oh a shark is suddenly going to pop out from the sea.

A bomb is going to get blasted around me..

I have to find the imposter in the "Among us" game

Why my friend has not replied back to my ping

Why no notification in my inbox….

Why I have less likes in this post than the last one or than another person…

Remember what I shared a while back. Like our biceps and triceps that get molded when we exercise them regularly, brain also gets molded in a certain behavior when it gets exercised in that direction.

Suggestion: Have a routine around screen time being used for entertainment activities. When predictability sets in a routine, it helps the child to put more pressure on him or herself to figure out other (subtler) ways to stimulate her or himself.

 Point 5: Switching to entertainment while attending school/tuitions

Say a child has a break of 30 minutes between two classes. He opens up a video game or you tube video to fill up the space.

Result: Let’s first understand the two types of entertainment here.

You tube videos- Passive, solitary and non engaging

Video games- Highly reactive to the visual/aural, being in continuous state of panic, directly connects with the reward center of the brain.

Compare that with what it takes to sit for academics. An active mode of focus, attention, engagement, and connect with the passive material. It is extremely slow in rewarding. As both are brain driven, screen based entertainment and academics, the immediate switch is difficult for a person. The challenge becomes starker for a child who is still developing self control and self regulation both as a behavior and biological maturity. We do no good by allowing them to be coupled.

Suggestion: I would rather the child gives brain a little break and moves around the house between the classes. Even picking up a story book is a better alternative. A rule of screen based entertainment post school time is a better idea. Further don’t expect the child to be in a quick switch mode of dragging out of bed and plopping in front of the laptop for school time. Keep the transition lag of the child in mind. Encourage a habit of waking up at least 30 minutes before the school time and go through the process of getting ready for the class. Sleeping on time is the first step towards the same. Discourage “let me watch screen only for 5 minutes before the classes”.

Point 6: Screen time at the cost of other physical activities and time with family

The child is with a device indulging in sedentary nature of entertainment in the evenings.

Result: A sedentary lifestyle is bound to have adverse effect on the physical and mental health of the child increasing chances of developing chronic health conditions. Their body is growing and it needs flexing. Simple.

Suggestion: If you are comfortable to send your child for some outdoors during this lockdown period (terrace or within a safe playground) or at least some ball on the walls games, trampoline, skipping rod, cycling or even online dance classes etc  put that as an expectation. That saves the child from replacing the required physical activity with a screen time. Similar restriction can be put during family time.

Parents, the restrictions of lockdown call for a different rules and structure within the family as well. Now that children are more at home, it is a good idea to have dedicated chores for them to carry out with some deadlines. Like

Making the bed before breakfast or

Hanging clothes to drying or putting them in wardrobe by lunch time or

Cleaning, Brooming....primarily anything that you feel the child is age wise ready for it.

This ways they can keep building motivation throughout the day. It keeps these little minds constructively involved and gives them small dosages of achievements. To summarize the six areas where moderation around screen time helps are:

Point 1: Screen time too close to sleep time

Point 2: Screen time at the time of eating

Point 3: Screen time for entertainment the first thing in the morning

Point 4: Screen time whenever getting bored

Point 5: Switching to entertainment while attending school/tuitions

Point 6: Screen time at the cost of other physical activities and time with family

Finally be aware of what they are doing during the screen time, both in terms of content and connect with the outside world. Cyber bullying, exposure to adult content, predators and push advertisements are all real problems. Keep your connect going with the child on around this.

I really hope by now you are in a good space of deciding for your child if the amount of screen time that your child is currently getting is developmentally and age-wise appropriate. Also hoping you now have some practical ways on what part should be moderated and how.

Feel free to reach out to me for your child’s behavior related questions or concerns. With children, the earlier the intervention….the better it is. Thank You.