Should Leaders Show Emotion?

There is a difference between showing emotion and using emotion.

While it might not be the best idea for a leader to show their raw emotions without restriction, selectively revealing their genuine emotions to invoke an emotional response in others is the hallmark of the very best leaders.

Unfortunately, we live in a world of sugar coating and polishing. Messages are carefully constructed to achieve the desired effect, and true feelings are hidden deep down, lest they hinder the corporate cause. Many believe that they have to toe the “political” line to progress in their careers, and we betray our true feelings so often that it almost becomes our second nature. Expressing our genuine emotions and feelings becomes rare in the modern office. 

That is what makes them so powerful. 

Emotions are critical to everything a leader must do: focus their team, change strategies, solidify relationships, foster trust, communicate a vision, make compromises and learn from failure. Without the power from genuine emotions, there are so many initiatives that would simply fall flat. Sometimes it can seem a little clumsy and uncomfortable when a leader “opens up” to their team, but that can make it all the more effective.

When leaders show their “human” side, people will join their cause.

The first step, however, is to be more aware of our emotions ourselves. In a business world where logic has dominated, we have suppressed our emotions to such an extent that sometimes we don’t even understand what we are truly feeling. When we are angry, we bury it deep down. When we are upset, we try not to show it. When we are excited, we temper it. When we are inspired, we dumb it down. How many times have you done this? How many times has the external reaction not been reflective of the internal urge?

Emotions are not only as important as logic - without them, no logical endeavor would ever come to pass. To make something happen, someone has to “feel” that it is meaningful for him or her. When leaders let their emotions out, they let other people get in. This takes a certain amount of bravery, but the “control” of a true leader is about inspiring their people and then backing off for them to do their own thing. 

There is the famous proverb in the ancient Chinese collection of philosophical writings titled Xunzi from Xun Kuang, the 3rd century BC Chinese philosopher known as "Master Xun" ("Xunzi") which is generally true to life: 不闻不若闻之，闻之不若见之，见之不若知之，知之不若行之。Translated it means:

Tell me, and I'll forget. Show me, and I may remember. Involve me, and I'll understand

Maybe we could add another line (suggested respectfully):

Make me feel and I’ll follow you.

Please share your thoughts in the comments section below as I learn just as much from you. I write a daily blog on leadership, innovation, careers, tech & self improvement. Here are some other articles I have written. If you like what you read, please feel free to follow me here on LinkedIn or via twitter @anuragharsh.