Should I tell my boss or colleagues about my high sensory perception?

Should I tell my boss or colleagues about my high sensory perception?

In a Zoom conversation I hosted last week about high sensory perception (AKA high sensory intelligence, high sensitivity, sensory processing sensitivity...), a participant asked how best to communicate to others about her trait.

She recognized that one of her superpowers—seeing potential consequences of a decision or action several steps ahead, because of all the data points her brain is processing and the connections she's making—was causing her colleagues frustration. They weren't seeing the same things she was and felt like she was quashing their ideas.

I knew exactly how she felt, as I've experienced the same thing.

The next day, a coaching client asked how best to communicate her trait at work for a slightly different reason: because she's taking in so much at once, she finds that she needs time to process and synthesize the information after each conversation or meeting, or she's likely to forget a lot of it. (This is completely normal, by the way, but high-sensory folks typically take in more than others— and may also be more aware of forgetting some of it.)

With my coach hat on, I didn't answer either of these questions directly—and I won't here, either ?? But I will ask a few additional questions and add some thoughts.

What's your goal?

What outcome are you hoping for by sharing this information with your boss or your colleagues?

The two cases I mentioned are a little different, so the goals and approaches might be, too.

Are you hoping to address past or future scenarios?

Are you looking for empathy or understanding, or to excuse behavior that upset someone?

Are you asking for something more concrete, like time between meetings to process, or advance notice of complex questions that require your input?

What might you do differently next time?

Now that you understand more about the way your own brain works and how it's different from others, what changes might you make to adapt to the way your team works?

In my case, I learned to start asking more questions instead of making statements or dismissing ideas out of hand. You could ask about next steps, for example, or how a certain kind of result might be handled.

Another approach is to take a part of the idea that could work and add to it, offering an alternative—collaborative—solution.

Depending on relationships, you could also ask about the thinking behind the idea (if you're coaching your own direct report, for example).

Do you feel safe?

The #1 theme I hear from high-sensory leaders and others, especially in the context of work, is that they feel alone.

The #2 theme is that their workplace is toxic.

Given how often both of these come up, would you feel safe sharing your high sensory perception with people at work?

Despite the fact that one out of every 3 to 5 people you work with are likely also high-sensory, the trait is still widely misunderstood and, unfortunately, still stigmatized.

Raising awareness is part of my mission—clearly! But this is one area in which it's critical that you put yourself and your own best interest before that of your team. Trust your intuition about whether to share this information or not.

How to share?

As HSPs tend to overthink all our communications and be particular about the way we word things, I have a few thoughts here, too.

First, how can we avoid introducing any more us/them dynamics? It's not about being special—it's about neurodiversity. All of our brains work differently; I'm pretty sure it's safe to say that no two brains in the world work exactly alike.

Neurodiversity's still not very well understood either, but awareness is growing. Although HSP isn't a disorder or a diagnosis, research has shown that HSP brains do function differently than most. So this might be a place to start.

This recent Forbes article—while still lacking in a few places—does a better job than most at explaining that neurodiversity is much broader than people think. (It also lists sensory processing disorders among types of neurodivergence; note that there is a clinical diagnosis called sensory processing disorder that is distinct from sensory processing sensitivity, or high sensory perception.)

I'd keep it as simple and straightforward as possible, and keep your intended outcome in mind.

How would you address this? And what questions do you have about high sensory perception?

Know someone who might be interested in this newsletter? Please share!

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Mun-Wai Chung

Empowering Christian CEOs, executives and entrepreneurs to thrive as faith-driven leaders in a rapidly changing world.

10 个月

It's important to know how to communicate. Thanks Rachel ??

Ghilaine Chan

Founders hire me to help build sustainable, human, customer-centric businesses with inclusive teams working excellently together, delivering consistently and reliably | Relieves Growing Pains of Scaling | Board Advisor

10 个月

Some great wisdom on how to share your true self to others Rachel Radway thank you!

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