Should I accept a counter offer?

“I resigned to accept another position yesterday and my boss came back to me with a counter offer. Should I consider it?”

I appreciate the inclination (and I may have made this decision myself earlier in my career....) but the short answer is - probably not.

Ideally, what you should have done (a year ago) is approach your boss proactively and have a candid and transparent conversation.

This is unfortunately all too rare and understandably risky and difficult to pull off.

So, let’s assume that didn’t happen (or didn’t result in the desired outcome) and now you’re in a tricky situation: a new firm is offering whatever led you to explore other opportunities in the first place: impact, compensation, responsibility, leadership, flexibility, agency, respect. Your boss suddenly recognizes your value. ?

While your current employer arguably had every opportunity to deliver, they didn’t. Some of that might be on you, but it's water under the bridge now.

The new firm is excited for you to join the team. They’ve invested a lot of time, energy and expense in courting you.

Until the counter offer, the path forward seemed so crystal clear and you were excited as well.

Now you’re filled with confusion, swinging from doubt to opportunism. It’s a highly unsettling place, even for seasoned professionals.

Stay the course.

More often than not, counters are short term fixes to endemic challenges. You may feel good in the near term about the compensation, staying with what is known and not disappointing people you’ve built relationships with. ?But it’s important to consider the bigger picture, including near term reputational damage and longer term career opportunity. ?

"I was thirsty so I drank

And though it was salt water

There was something 'bout the way

It tasted so familiar....."

~ Josh Ritter "Change of Time"

Ultimately, it takes courage and fortitude to leave the tribe. Humanity survived by building and fostering social networks; from an evolutionary perspective, resigning from a job is understandably a deeply uncomfortable experience.

?And yet, it’s time to take the leap.

Your job now is to walk the fine line between staying firm and being respectful. Be careful not to mislead your boss into believing you’re open to a counter. At the same time, you owe them the professional courtesy of being heard out.?

Listen with respect, then graciously decline and start focusing on your next right move, which is making sure you leave on the best, amicable terms possible.

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About Willow Hill Advisors

Laurie Thompson is the founder of Willow Hill Advisors, a retained executive recruiting and career advisory firm. Prior to founding Willow Hill in 2019, Laurie spent 16 years in the financial services practice of a large global executive search and leadership advisory firm.

Laurie works in close partnership with hiring managers and human resources professionals to build exceptional fundraising and investor relations teams while supporting client-facing professionals in reaching and sustaining individual peak performance.

Laurie launched the “Ask me Anything” series in 2022 with the intention of offering candid insights and advice as themes emerge from her conversations with prospective candidates and hiring managers.

Please send your questions and feedback to [email protected]