Shipt Thoughts: National Coming Out Day

For National Coming Out Day, we asked Flex Team Specialist Payton C. to tell his story and offer insight into coming out. We hope this piece inspires and educates. Wherever you, a loved one, or a colleague is on their journey, happy National Coming Out Day from Shipt HQ to you.

How has coming out impacted your life in and out of the workplace?

Coming out at the age of 13 definitely impacted my life. Due to a hostile home environment, I had to choose between myself and my family. Luckily, I had enough self-worth to choose myself. With the help of a friend’s family, I had a place to call home and was able to finish my education. I will be forever grateful to them for the love and compassion they gave to me.

Looking back, there is not a thing I would change. Life has a crazy and inspiring way of getting us to where we need to be and I am very thankful for my past experiences. With it, I have created a perfect life with my wonderful husband, a great career, and peace that I am proud of.

What common misconceptions do you hear about coming out?

That you only have to do it once. This could not be further from the truth. Coming out is a lifelong process that will never end. Over time, it does get easier to say “Oh I’m gay” or “I have a husband, not a wife.” But regardless of how much easier it gets, it is a process that is never-ending.

What advice would you give to someone about coming out?

No matter who you decide to tell first, the tightness you feel in your chest will be there no matter what. The pressure that builds up when beginning the conversation is a natural response to any uncomfortable conversation. Just embrace it! Identify the worst-case scenario, and then repeat this to yourself: “This won’t happen, and if it does, I will survive and thrive”. After the first person is told, relish the ‘high’ that comes afterward, it will be the best feeling in your life.

How can allies–both at work and outside of work–support the process of coming out?

I believe that the best way to support someone during this process is to be someone who will always listen. Regardless of your ability to ‘help’, always listen. Having someone to talk things over with can make the biggest difference in someone's journey.

What does coming out mean to you??

When I think about what coming out means to me, I can’t help but think of the word free. Going through the process of coming out is one of the hardest and most painful things people in my community have to go through. It is the gateway to so much strife, heartache, and heartbreak. But going through this builds a level of self-preservation, a sense of importance, and a feeling of what you deserve in life—all of which are needed to be truly and authentically yourself.

Thanks to Payton C. for sharing his story and thoughts with us. With this type of authenticity and caring in our Shipt community, we can spark the connections that show why every person counts.