The Ship is sinking.

Who do you agree to save?

The ship is sinking with 20 passengers and you are only able to save ten. You have a list of the 20 passengers. Which ten do you and your group agree to save?

This has been an exercise given to all my coaching groups and teams and I have been fascinated during the last nine years to see how people have approached the exercise.

It is guaranteed that in each group one person will take the list, grab a pen and say,

“We will definitely save….” To which someone else in the group will say,

“No!!! WE WILL NOT!!!”

A discussion/argument has then ensued as they have discovered that who they would save in a heartbeat would not be saved by others in their group. One person’s “definitely save” is another person’s “definitely not save”.

The point of the exercise is not that there is any wrong or right, but for everyone to become aware of their values, biases, blindspots and actions and how we do not consciously choose, but default to years of conditioning in our subconscious. We assume that our thinking, values and consequent behaviour are shared by everyone. What stories do we use to convince our team mates and to make our decisions right? How are our behaviours in sharp contrast to our words?

Let me highlight

There is one person on that passenger list who has been saved by every single group. There has been no discussion and no disagreement. EVER. The person has been “saved” across gender, race, age, sexual identity, language, vocation, culture, religion, socioeconomic status, job title.

Every single person has agreed to save… WHO?

Can you guess? Who would you save without question?

Yes.

The Doctor.

Every single person has agreed to save the DOCTOR, without question and without any discussion.

(I may add here that the list has also included a traditional healer who has been a subject of increasing debate. Years ago, no one saved the traditional healer and now at least one group, if not more will elect to save the traditional healer in addition to the doctor.)

Back to the doctor.

It is almost part of our DNA that we see doctors as being respected, of great value, saving us and more important than others. Our adoration and blind trust are unquestioned.

The problem with this approach is that we put the doctor on a pedestal. They become untouchable. They are god-like, super-hero and non-human.

Let me invite you to step onto the pedestal for a moment and swop places with the doctor.

You are acutely aware that you are seen as super-hero and god-like.

You are answering a calling and are there to save lives. People die without your intervention.

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How difficult is it to be human on that pedestal?

Can you be fallible?

Can you get tired, hungry, thirsty?

Can you feel pain? Anger? Disappointment?

Can you feel unsure?

Can you sit on the floor and sob at the loss of a patient?

Can you leave your sick patients and go home to your family and loved ones?

Can you express frustration?

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The truth is that it is incredibly difficult to be human and real on that pedestal that society has put doctors on. This leads to a feeling of being isolated and socially alienated. The feeling that you cannot reach out for help. You cannot fall from grace. Society is watching. More and more doctors withdraw and experience moral injury, compassion fatigue, depression, burnout, substance abuse, suicide and leave the profession.

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What can we do? Let’s take the doctor off the pedestal out of respect and treat them as people. Yes, people with big callings, but nevertheless people who should be allowed to bleed and cry just like you and me.

Let’s check in with our doctors and see how they are doing? How have they processed and managed the last 18 months? What can you do to show that you care?

#healthcare #medicalprofessional #doctor #selfcare #mentalwellness

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Colleen Qvist is a life and business coach for doctors and other medical professionals. Colleen can be contacted on [email protected]

Colleen coaches groups, teams and individuals.