Shift From ‘Thinking’ Gratitude To ‘Feeling’ it

If you haven’t noticed, gratitude is “in.” These days it’s fashionable to be grateful, especially as an antidote to stress. That means lots of well-meaning people are trying to cultivate gratitude; and sometimes with mixed results.

Srikumar Rao is an elite executive coach. He works with successful entrepreneurs and senior executives who want to have a significant impact on the world, and who are consciously on a spiritual journey.

After reading his new book “Modern Wisdom, Ancient Roots ,” I asked him about the benefits of gratitude.

He told me gratitude is the foundation for creativity and personal mastery; but, he said, if you dig a little deeper you'll find many people who claim gratitude doesn't work for them. An attendee a recent talk he gave said, “I practice gratitude. It feels good. But I don’t find that it makes my life better in any significant way. What am I missing?”

Rao's attendee went on to say she kept a journal and wrote down three things every day that she ‘should’ feel grateful for. She thought long and hard about the many ways she was fortunate and blessed. She had good health, a great job that she enjoyed, a supportive partner, financial security, and much more. Still, she didn't warm up to gratitude and couldn't see the benefits many writers claim gratitude delivers.

Professor Rao said a lot of his students feel the same way until he points out how they are missing the mark. He said most fans and followers of his work are Type A personalities who live inside their heads. They make lists. They think about everything. As such, they make lists of the ‘good things’ in their life. Good health – check. Food to eat – check. Bed to sleep in – check. And therein lies the problem, he says. You cannot think gratitude and check the box. You have to feel it.

?So how do you go from thinking gratitude to feeling it?

This is simple, but it requires conscious, deliberate effort on your part. And patience, because you have to keep at it till you get the hang of it.

My friend said: “Don’t just make lists. Instead, take just one item at a time and reflect deeply on it. See clearly how that item is embedded in your life and the stories associated with it and how it links up with other things in your life.”

As he said, that kind of deeper dive requires effort and time. But if you persist, the ‘thinking’ about gratitude morphs into ‘feeling.’ And that is when all the benefits pour down on you.

As research has found, when you are feeling gratitude, you are not angry. You are not fearful. You are not anxious. You are not nervous. You are not worried. These feelings don't co-exist with gratitude.

Professor Rao says this is how you cultivate true gratitude.

I’m grateful for you and glad you're here.

ANXIETY AT WORK PODCAST

Each week, my co-author and dear friend,?Adrian Gostick , and I get to talk to leading authorities on mental health and explore the causes of workplace stress and anxiety, along with practices that are proven to reduce tension and cultivate calm.?

In this episode, you will learn:

1. What the AWE Method is (and what on earth is an AWEgasm?)

2. How AWE is scientifically proven to reduce anxiety, depression and loneliness and improves overall health conditions

3. Five reasons awe makes your life better

Our guest today is?Michael Amster, MD , a physician and researcher, writer, and teacher at the UC Berkeley Greater Good Science Center. He is the founding director of the pain management department at Santa Cruz Community Health. A practitioner of meditation for over thirty years, he is also a certified yoga and meditation teacher. He splits his time between clinical work, research on awe, teaching mindfulness, and leading awe-inspiring retreats around the world. His new book from Hachette is “The Power of Awe .”

Leading with Gratitude ?&?Anxiety at Work ?are available wherever you like to get your books.?Visit?The Culture Works ?for free resources including videos, podcast episodes, and more, to help you build an all in culture of gratitude.