The Shift from Restraint to Retaliation: A Reflection on Rising Anger in Society

John Leguizamo recently posted a thought-provoking image on his Facebook page that read, “I’m so glad we went from ‘When they go low, we go high’ to ‘Girl, hold my earrings while I drag this MF.’” He added his own commentary: “Me too! We can’t turn the other cheek; we have to hit back!” This sentiment echoes a growing trend in today's society, where turning the other cheek is often seen as weakness, and retaliating with anger or violence is increasingly viewed as the answer to everything.

From heated rants on social media platforms like Twitter (now X) to physical altercations among lawmakers, it seems that fighting has become a daily occurrence, even in the most formal settings like Congress. For instance, we've witnessed heated exchanges in Congress devolve into near-physical confrontations, with members shouting insults or even threatening violence. These incidents raise the question: when did occasional street fights turn into everyday occurrences in any setting?

The rise in public anger is undeniable, and it’s reflected in the statistics. Studies show that anger among Americans has surged over the past decade, fueled by various stressors. The pressures of modern life, including economic uncertainty, political polarization, and the constant barrage of negative news, have all contributed to this boiling pot of emotions.

It's no wonder people are angry. Americans today face a myriad of challenges, from job insecurity to healthcare concerns, to the overwhelming cost of living. These issues weigh heavily on people's minds, and for some, anger becomes the easiest outlet for their frustrations.

Reflecting on my own past, I was once an angry person who often found myself in bar fights. Looking back, I realize that I could and should have handled those situations differently. But now, we see even grandmothers duking it out over Black Friday sales. For instance, a news story recently highlighted two elderly women getting into a physical altercation over a discounted TV. This kind of behavior, once unthinkable, is now becoming more common, with countless videos circulating on social media showing ordinary people in everyday situations resorting to violence.

But is giving in to our anger truly the answer? I was raised to believe that controlling your emotions in a hostile situation was a sign of strength. Now, it seems we praise those who lose control and punch someone in the face. Everywhere I look, it feels like the promotion of violence is trending.

This shift in societal norms became glaringly apparent to me when I was part of a Facebook group called “Millennials Aren’t Children Anymore.” After the attempted assassination of our former president, a post in the group lamented that the shooter had missed. The comment section was filled with hateful remarks and people openly wishing for the president's death. Disturbed by this, I ultimately left the group, but it got me thinking: when did violence become so acceptable?

During the meet and greet with my son's football coaches, they emphasized the need to review expectations for parents due to a troubling rise in fights breaking out at youth sporting events. Unfortunately, this is not an isolated issue. Across the country, incidents of violence at kids' games are becoming more common, with parents clashing over calls, rivalries, and even perceived slights. A report from the National Federation of State High School Associations (NFHS) highlights a significant increase in such altercations, noting that more than 70% of referees have witnessed physical confrontations between parents at games . For example, in New Jersey, a brawl broke out between parents during a youth basketball game, resulting in injuries and arrests . These incidents underscore the growing tension and lack of control that often permeates our culture, even at events meant to teach children about sportsmanship and teamwork.

As a society, we need to ask ourselves how we can move forward in a way that doesn't rely on violence. It's crucial to remember that true strength lies not in how hard you can hit, but in how well you can maintain your composure and resolve conflicts peacefully. We must start promoting emotional intelligence and conflict resolution over brute force. Only then can we hope to create a more peaceful and just society. Remember that the generation of tomorrow are watching us, so it's time to lead by example.