Shelf Help is Usually Just That
Ken Carlson
Experienced Executive Coach and Leadership Trainer with a knack for working with Geeks; Specializing in Engineering, Science, Math, and Medical.
I checked my Kindle today; I have 309 books on my virtual shelf. Granted, there are a few David Baldacci thrillers and some other guilty pleasures, but 90% are non-fiction advice books about leadership, relationships, career, and generally how-to live the best, most amazing life possible in all areas.
Self-Help.
As a coach of leaders all over the world, my clients are often hungry for a resource to give them all the answers and I have my go-to books for scenarios like the following:
Something changed for me though, now that I am a coach.
Sometimes I offer these books, but sometimes I don’t because the truth is that books almost never make the difference people expect them to make, even if it’s an excellent resource.
I was talking to a client today who wanted some resources on dealing with conflict at work. I had offered him Crucial Conversations and he came to today’s session with the results of his reading.
“Ken, all the situations were just too perfect and although I think the strategies could work, there is no way I am going to remember all of those different queues and directions that they list in the book unless I walked around with the book in my hand.”
What he needs actually is practice. So that’s what we did—we looked at his scenarios. Talked about them. Created a next step strategy.
It turns out the book is a good starting point for a conversation. The concept of why people struggle during hard conversations is now available to him—and combined with coaching, he has a way forward.
This is especially true with neurodivergent leaders. The book, if they have the focus to sit down and read, is best used as a starting point for practicing what is really going on for them. Role-playing. Dissecting scenarios. This is the way. Coaching.
I’m happy to touch base with you directly if you want a resource recommendation—but I will also encourage you to add a conversation with a coach, mentor, or friend to your process if you want to get the most out of it.
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Past Articles: Neurodiverse Leadership Resource Library
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2 周Totally agree. I used to read all of those, but if you ask me now, I don’t think I could quote a single one. It’s all about in person practice and observation for me. I’ve gone back to using my reading time to get lost in a novel :)