Shed The Baggage!

At 48, I revolutionised my life. Having been used to carrying numerous bags or one huge bag stuffed with innumerable things, I had been often been at the receiving end of censure of those who cared about me; though I must point out that they quite often needed a lot of things that I had in my bag and unhesitatingly borrowed them. This however does not mean that they were wrong in chiding me. They often scolded me for various reasons varying from purely argumentative ones like ‘why do you need all this on an everyday basis in the first place’ to more practical ones like ‘you will develop spondylitis or frozen shoulder by carrying all this weight around’. These arguments, while striking a chord within me, never compelled me to change my ways and I often shrugged away their arguments with irritation, ignoring them or a laugh, depending upon my mood. Then, as I grew older the one heavy bag gave way to three smaller ones (with some things being dropped from them, of course). Yet the chiding continued, now with colleagues being added to the list. However, I stayed firm in my belief that I needed them, even though they were becoming more difficult to manage, especially while travelling by bus or changing multiple modes of transport. Actually, when I moved from one large bag to one medium one and a smaller one, in addition to my lunch bag, I thought I had changed myself. I also thought that as a woman I needed those many – a purse, a bag from my books and papers and a lunch bag (this despite the fact that I don’t carry or use any cosmetics). Now, come on, being out the whole day one needed this much!

Then, one day, I took a revolutionary decision, I would carry only two bags, a medium sized purse and a lunch bag. I was unsure I could make that happen and those around me looked on bemused and not really believing it would become a reality. And then, just like that, it happened – I made it possible. You may wonder how does that merit an article devoted to it? Well, hold your breath; but, it’s an action that has brought with it a huge lesson; a lesson that is important for each one of us to learn. A lesson that tells us that IT’S IMPORTANT TO SHED OUR BAGGAGE; and, it is this lesson that I wish to throw light on – a lesson that hides within it three levels of baggage that we carry; and, as we go farther, the weight of this baggage increases and tires us out, if we do not, in time, learn to shed it, as we go along.

As stated earlier, the first kind of baggage that we carry is physical baggage – the baggage of our belongings. Gradually, we keep increasing these belongings and come to define them as necessities. Those, which we easily did without, now come to define our existence and slowly chain it. We begin to call them symbols of our status or definitions of our growth in life or worst still markers of our identity, based on what we deserve. These may be in the form of bottled water only, or luxurious cars, or latest gadgets or huge houses. What we fail to see is whether these are necessities or encumbrances. Whatever facilitates us is no doubt a definition of progress and should be welcomed, like our mobile phones or even cars; but the question we should ask ourselves is are we over-dependent on them? Have we forgotten to calculate even basic figures, without using a calculator? Have we lost the fun of sitting on the floor, because of our ideas of being ‘proper’? Do we consider it below our dignity to take public transport or worst still do we make a big issue of sharing a car with another guest, who is sharing the dais with us, because we think it reduces our prestige? Well, we need to understand that we need to shed this baggage; even if not completely. This simply means that while enjoying the luxuries, we need to be conscious that we do not become slaves to them; we need to look upon development as progress and not get ensnared by it!

While this basic form of baggage is external and therefore easier to shed, if one makes a conscious attempt, the other two are far more complex. At the intermediate level is our intellectual baggage – our education, our beliefs, our principles, our sense of righteousness and its unsaid - our prejudices, our complacency, our often misplaced sense of superiority and a lot else. Being a part of our mind, we rarely realise it. Our condescending statements, the ease with which we judge others, the misplaced self-righteousness, with which we tend to dismiss all that doesn’t reinforce our beliefs, our dogmas (intellectual, religious or cultural), our focus on a narrow field of expertise, to the exclusion of all others, our unwillingness or inability to change, all these, among many others, forms an important part of this list. This intellectual baggage makes us intolerant and rigid – a fact that we fail to see, contradicting the very idea of intellect symbolising an expansion of the mind. This manifests in the approach of ‘my way or the highway’ or a belief that one has the key or more importantly the ‘right’ key, to open all locks. We thus refuse to learn or grow, in any way. In short, we get so blinkered that we refuse to see that what we believe is right is only so up to the point that it is proven wrong; like the belief that the earth is flat, for example.

What is worse is that intellectual baggage comes with a sense of entitlement a belief that one has earned the right to the opinion through one’s expertise. What one often fails to see though is that there is an essential difference between having an opinion and being opinionated. Awareness of this difference leads to erudition and humility that then makes one’s knowledge an ornament and not a hindrance or as the Marathi saying points out “?????? ??????? ?????”

Finally, what lies deepest or at the peak of the baggage pyramid is emotional baggage, with the core emotion that defines it often being ‘hurt’. Like live coals, which may be meant to hurt others if flung at them, but land up burning oneself first, hurt achieves little. Pain cannot be denied, especially when more than one person is involved. However, it should be treated as a learning experience and not as an end. One should learn not to nurse it, but rather ‘let go’ (Refer here to my article Moving On https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/moving-dr-preeti-shirodkar?published=t). The first step to achieving this is to understand and apply what Gandhiji has so succinctly expressed, “Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”

Furthermore our experiences and the manner in which they define our perception or behaviour also serve as a reflection and a more subtle one of emotional baggage. While it may be deemed natural to, as a Marathi saying goes, “blow on buttermilk to cool it, if one has burnt one’s mouth drinking milk” (?????? ??????? ????? ??? ?? ?????? ????); it only leads to a narrowing of one’s vision; for, any experience may be a one off. This means that it should not either define or taint one’s perception. Moreover, even if one considers the experience a rule, one needs to realise that it should help in shaping one’s understanding, not colouring it!

Briefly put, one needs to embark on the journey of shedding one’s baggage, as against acquiring it; as one moves from birth to death, one needs to shed more baggage, rather than acquiring it! What one needs to carry instead is the experience and the lessons it offers; for that is what is bound to bring one peace and joy. One should, if not for anything else, at least do it for a purely selfish reason! This is no doubt difficult; but not impossible to achieve. It is the way shown by saints and followed by those, who have found heaven on earth and created it for others, from whichever walk of life they may be. Given that the words of the saints, which echo this sentiment, are not coming to my mind currently, I will end with a hope, expressed by slightly changing the words of Rabindranath Tagore

Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way

Into the dreary desert sand of dead habit

Where the mind is led forward

Into ever-widening thought and action

Into that heaven of wisdom let me awake