To Share Or Not To Share

The debate about whether to share your intentions with others or keep them to yourself is a common one. Here I'm referring to 'intentions' as it pertains to your 'why' and 'how' and your thoughts of possibly pivoting from what you're doing today, to something new and exciting that you would like to pursue moving forward.

Intentions Build Habits, Goals Don't. Goals feel like an obligation and intentions feel like an invitation to explore. Chasing goals makes you feel like you are never enough. Intentions empower you to be yourself.

Here are examples of both arguments:

Sharing Your Intentions

Some experts believe that sharing your intentions creates momentum and garners support from others.

Sharing your intentions with others can have several benefits, as highlighted by experts and research:

- Increased Accountability: When you share your intentions with someone, you automatically make yourself more accountable towards that particular intention. This can help ensure that you stick to your intentions and increase your overall involvement in the project.

- Clarity and Modification of Intentions: Sharing your intentions with others can help you frame and modify them more clearly. Through discussions with others, your intentions can take a new form and become more structured.

- Measuring Progress: Sharing intentions can make it easier to measure your progress. For example, if you share an intention to give up smoking, you can ask friends to cheer for you every day that you do not smoke, helping you measure your progress.

- Increased Motivation and Connection: Sharing your intentions can facilitate the measurement of your progress. For instance, if you communicate an intention to quit smoking, you can enlist the support of friends to celebrate each day that you refrain from smoking, which aids in tracking your progress.

- Improved Intention Commitment: Studies have indicated that individuals are likely to demonstrate greater commitment to their intentions after sharing them with someone they perceive as having "higher status" or whose opinions they value. This heightened commitment can result in increased dedication and a stronger reluctance to abandon the intention.

Keeping Your Intentions to Yourself

Conversely, some believe in the value of maintaining discretion about one's intentions. This viewpoint emphasizes the importance of leading by example rather than dictating others' behavior. Advocates of this strategy contend that discussing one's ambitions might foster a premature sense of fulfillment, thereby dampening the drive to achieve. They advocate for channeling attention towards the work at hand, rather than soliciting support or congratulations from the outside world.

Certainly! Here are some bullet points on the benefits and rationale behind keeping your intentions to yourself:

- Enhances Focus: Keeping goals private allows for a concentrated effort on the tasks at hand without the distraction of external opinions or advice.

- Prevents Unnecessary Pressure: Sharing intentions widely can create external pressure and expectations, leading to added stress and possibly deterring one's progress.

- Avoids Premature Satisfaction: Discussing goals publicly can sometimes lead to a false sense of achievement, reducing the motivation to pursue the actual work needed.

- Encourages Self-Reliance: Relying on internal motivation rather than seeking external validation fosters a stronger sense of self-discipline and resilience.

- Protects Your Ideas: Keeping plans close to your chest helps in safeguarding your ideas from being prematurely judged, criticized, or even appropriated by others.

- Builds Surprise Element: Revealing achievements only after they have been accomplished can have a greater impact, creating a surprise element that can enhance the perceived value of your accomplishments.

- Reduces Negative Feedback: By not sharing your intentions, you minimize exposure to potentially discouraging or negative feedback that can affect your confidence and determination.

- Cultivates Inner Confidence: Achieving goals without the need for public acknowledgment reinforces personal belief in one's abilities and decisions.

- Maintains Flexibility: Keeping intentions private allows for changing or adjusting your goals without having to explain or justify the reasons for such changes to others.

- Encourages Independent Validation: Success feels more genuine and rewarding when it is achieved and validated internally, rather than being influenced by the expectations or approval of others.

My Preference

By communicating my intentions, I've cultivated a supportive community that, often without fully realizing it, remains vigilant for opportunities that could aid in my success. This expanding network of allies enhances my prospects significantly, as it taps into the inherent human desire to assist others. Consequently, the larger my circle of support, the higher the likelihood of connecting with someone pivotal who could unlock the door to my achievement in this venture.

Conclusion

Sharing your intentions with the right people can lead to increased accountability, clarity, motivation, and commitment, ultimately helping you achieve your intentions. However, it's important to be selective about whom you share your intentions with, as the impact can depend on the status and investment of the individuals with whom you share your intentions.

In essence, whether you choose to share your intentions or keep them to yourself depends on how you're influenced by external validation and your personal motivation mechanisms. While sharing with a close, supportive friend who understands your intentions and can provide constructive feedback might help, broadly announcing your intentions could inadvertently hinder your progress by providing a false sense of accomplishment and diminishing your intrinsic motivation.

My Offer To You

Do you need to be accountable to someone in order to take action and make progress? If so, reach out to me and I'll help you in any way I can and no, it won't cost you a dime!

Email me directly at [email protected] or make a post on LinkedIn letting me know this edition of the newsletter helped with a small description as to how. Whatever works for you but you owe it to yourself to take action.

Thanks for reading my newsletter...it means the world to me.

Joe