Shard#9 Broken Promises
Suzanne V.
Shard Nurse with a passion. Innovative academic and researcher, always looking to collaborate and captain change for consumers, colleagues and community.
Blogging Mistakes
Well, I’ve done it. I have committed a blogging sin, or at least mistake No. 16 according to this blogging site page: Beginner Blogger Mistakes.
I am blogging inconsistently. Oh, and while I am at it, also mistake no. 14, only using one medium to share my content. Yes, guilty as charged. I have removed myself from the crossed-out Birdie, use Bookface only for private sharing, and am a ‘stalker’ on Quickgram, to keep up with overseas loved ones.
So, after a very long hiatus, I thought I would see if the creativity could flow again. Not that there wasn’t enough content I could have bored you with, but somehow the doing got in the way of the writing.
So, let’s have a go!
Broken Promises
I know I promised to follow up with the Babovka Principle, but I will need to do a bit more research on that to make it solid (insert the thought of procrastinating my PhD here…).
So, my apologies for breaking a promise, or was it a promise? Does it make a difference to you that you have not heard about it yet? Were you holding out for it? I do not think so. I am also not vain enough to think that my writing will change anything for anyone, apart maybe from a little idea or new thought. It is certainly not life changing. But why then do I feel I have broken a promise and failed?
Photo by?CHUTTERSNAP?on?Unsplash
The ‘Promises’ We Make
If you are a nurse you might relate to waking up in the middle of the night after a shift and realising that you did not bring that patient the promised extra pillow, cup of tea, snack or something else… and you feel guilty. You promised something and then did not do it, and it sits there in your mind, and getting back to sleep is so hard now because you start mulling over it.
Is there science behind it? Well, I am glad you asked, as I found this article on Incomplete promises and the norm of keeping promises which explained my actions and emotions, ?
?
‘…the decision to keep a promise is made under the same circumstances in which the promise was made, and there is no risk. However, in reality, circumstances change considerably very often…’ (Mittlaender, 2024, p.1)
?
领英推荐
Yes, another patient had a fall, this emergency required extra attention, care, phone calls, documentation, and then the pillow, cup of tea or snack just slipped your mind.
?Photo by?Alexandra Gorn?on?Unsplash
Ok, now I did go down that rabbit hole – procrastination at its best! But, it is actually very interesting reading.
I am not talking about broken marriage vows or promises that erode substantial trust. That would be a different conversation, but I am talking about these daily ‘smaller’ promises we make or indicate to others. What about promises to ourselves?
?Good Intentions & Self Promises
Marquita in an online post in Medium How Good Intentions Lead to Broken Promises | by Marquita Herald | Medium explores the promises we make to ourselves, and very often break. She goes on to say that we see these promises as intentions and so we rarely follow through. I really relate to that. Monday, or the first of the month, is always a good day to start yet another good habit (insert your own good intentions here).
Do I value promises I make to myself less than those I make to others? I rarely lay awake at night mulling over having eaten that piece of cake (well, you have to taste your own baking don’t you) even though I promised myself I would be strong and resist and reduce my calorie intake.
As you know, this is not a self-help blog, but I do like what Marquita says about the need to take my promises to myself more seriously, think before I have this intention (make the promise) and draw up an action plan on how to fulfill this promise.
Here is to promising to be realistic with my promises, think before I commit, but in all of it be kind with others and myself.
Suzanne The Shard Nurse
#NursesWhereYouNeedThem #NursesNurtureTheirYoung #TheShardNurse
Reference with missing hanging indent:
Mittlaender, S. (2024). Incomplete promises and the norm of keeping promises.?Journal of Behavioral and Experimental Economics,?109, 102182-. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.socec.2024.102182
?