Setting Your Child Free

A young man presented his mother with a gift on her birthday. It was a Willow Tree sculpture of a mother holding her child by the hands as the child learns how to walk. She picked out the perfect spot in her office, and it remained on the window ledge for years to come.

Her son began to face numerous challenges, and during this time she entered the room only to discover that this precious gift had now fallen off the ledge, and now lay broken on the floor.

The crack in the ceramic caused the little boy to no longer be attached to the mother. Delicately, she picked up the pieces. Placing them on a table she attempted to glue them back together. However, despite her best efforts, a visible crack remained in both of the mother’s arms.

Later that evening, she again took a look at that sculpture. She felt a deep sadness over the damage. However, she suddenly saw this figure in a whole new light. She realized that when a mother is blessed with a child it is not hers to carry alone – she will crack with the weight. The child needs to be set free so he can be all that he is meant to be.

That night, she set her son free. She understood that he needed to heal in a way that only he knew and understood to be true for him. She trusted that he would be given the love, grace, and courage that he needed. She let go with hope and unconditional love, and turned her focus on her own journey.

 The Navajo Indian Tribe believes that we are placed on earth to either learn or teach. Once we have accomplished our ‘deed’, our spirit is ready, and we leave. For them, life is a journey of the spirit, where the ultimate goal is to complete our assigned task.

I believe that we each have an assigned task. There is something that exists within each of us that did not exist here on earth until we arrived. If we do not act this out, then we miss out on fulfilling our legacy.

The very fact that you are reading this means that you have unfinished business. If that were not the case, your higher power (You may call this God, Creator, Allah, Buddha etc.) would say, “Let’s go.”

Before I was born, I envision sitting at a table across from the Creator. I was passed a piece of paper that contained a long checklist. I was informed that these were the tasks and lessons that I was supposed to learn and teach in my life. I reviewed it, signed the dotted line, and left, ready to experience my life.

I believe that when we start to deviate from this plan, there will be some form of intervention. Perhaps we will suddenly be involved in an accident, or become ill in an effort to slow us down and get us back on track. Maybe this life event will place us on our backs in a hospital bed.

It is in these moments that we are forced to slow down and spend time with ourselves. Suddenly there are little distractions, and we are challenged to explore the relationship that we have with self. At this time, we might also ask some of the larger questions in life, such as purpose.

 Do you have a relationship with self?

What is your purpose?

The above story is an excerpt from Allan’s new book Goodbye Stress. Hello Life!