Setting Goals

We all know that in the new year, everyone sets new goals. However, by the second week of February, most have already given up or abandoned them. Today we’re talking about the importance of not only setting goals for the new year and decade, but also how to ensure that we are making progress towards those goals to transform into the best version of yourself. 

Setting goals is the most spiritual and compassionate practice that I know. The point of having goals is not just to achieve them but to find happiness, which comes from your mind and what you think about at the present moment. In my opinion, our purpose on this planet is to evolve and become the best version of ourselves. The journey of taking tons of action to get to that goal and facing your mind, fears, and doubts, is the real WIN here. Setting bigger goals makes us come up against all these different emotions and thought limitations. The only way to achieve greater results is to learn how to manage and supervise our brains so that we can train them to constrain to give us the results that we are looking for.

Here is a goal process that illustrates this concept of goal setting.

Do you plan for the things you want to create or dream of?

Many of my clients are putting out fires all day that they don’t take the time to intentionally think about what they want. We have learned to always want something out of scarcity and lack mindset. Dreaming always causes us pain because it reminds us that we don't already have what we want. So, the only way I know to overcome this is to dream out of a place of abundance.

Here is an exercise that you can do: make a list of 25 things that you want and what you already have. For example, “I really want to be married and have my 2 kids.” If you have this already, this is different from being grateful for those things. Something that I don’t already have but want is to take my family on a Euro trip next year. So, I put that in there with all the things that I already have on the list. That’s an example of wanting from a place of abundance because we cannot have more unless we are already feeling grateful for what we already have. When you focus on gratitude, it is easier to build on that rather than focus on the lack of the things that you don’t already have.

Be really specific.

I like to talk about my goals. For example, I want to take my kids on a trip to Europe by Summer 2021. I already know the airline I’m going to take, which countries we’re going to, how long, etc. Your goals should be as specific as possible, filling in as many details as possible.

The next thing your brain wants you to know is the HOW. Hold that for now. Focus and constrain your brain on what you want and write them down in as much detail as possible. You must write down your goals. Something about writing down goals is powerful. Then, you must work backwards and write down the goal broken down into action steps.

The next thing that I want you to expect are all of the negative thoughts to show up. Just know that this is part of the process and completely normal. You can address these thoughts by writing them down and seeing them on paper, but know that you don’t have to believe them. The most persistent thought that will show up is “I don’t know.” This is a dream killing thought. Instead, think of ways you could achieve the goals if you knew how to do it. Let your mind come up with the HOW - I promise you it will. When we learn how to ask better questions, we tend to get better answers. It takes about 20 minutes to get your creative juices flowing, so take your time to stay still until your brain comes up with the answer. Breaking down your goals into smaller steps throughout the years, months, weeks, days, hours, or minutes will help you tremendously. For example, you might not know how to build a website or start a podcast, but by breaking down the action steps of HOW and working the plan backwards, you will always figure it out. It’s like Marie Forleo says (in a book highly recommended by me), “Everything is figureoutable.”

There is this concept that I call “Do Goal.” If you have a really big goal, set yourself up so that you get your goal no matter what. What do I mean by that? Here’s an example: one of my clients wanted to find the love of her life and get married. I told her to go on 200 dates to reach her goal. At first she resisted, but it worked. She is now happily married to a guy from one of those dates. The process of taking that kind of action where she was going to go into some really bad dates to get to finding the right person is the journey of her transforming into that next version of herself. So, basically this concept requires taking enough massive action until you can’t leave the ultimate outcome to chance. Pretty powerful, right? 

In conclusion, it's not the achievement of the goal that matters. The real journey to transformation is the process of overcoming those fears, doubts, and negative emotions.

You’re gonna have things happen to you, meet new people, and learn so much about yourself along the way. What changes you into an evolved higher version of yourself is the journey of facing all those rollercoaster emotions and the fact that you were able to overcome that in the face of adversity--becomes the real WIN. Don't stay in your comfort zone because of fear as it is just an emotion. There is nothing you can't have if you commit yourself to the process. It’s like they say: everything you want is on the other side of fear, and following this process is the journey to take you there. 

I invite you to dream differently in trying this process and watch yourself transform on the journey to your dream goals and, ultimately, life. Stay tuned for more great topics and tips that you can use in your life and business right away. If you found this post helpful today, be sure to subscribe because it will only get better from here. I cannot wait to connect with you here again next week!

For more, I have a FREE “Guide to top 10 mental blocks for entrepreneurs” when you visit my website elonaloparicoaching.com where you can take these concepts further so they can help you right away.