Set your own PACE: My reflections on my coaching journey...

I am currently on my PCC coaching certification journey, and this has given me an opportunity to read some very interesting books, engage in deep conversations and reflect upon new concepts. All of these have significantly added to who I am as a person and how I coach. I have attempted to summarize my learnings below through the PACE model that I have created- Presence, Authenticity, Curiosity and Empathy.?

Presence: Presence is about how we are “being”, how we show up in our conversations, it is about the energy that we exude. It involves being fully conscious, open and flexible and having an awareness of oneself, the conversation and the coachee. Being fully present enables the coach to build deep rapport, trust and connection with the coachee. I have started being more present in all my conversations and bring my entire self and my energy to them. This has helped me engage in a deeper and more meaningful manner with others.??

Authenticity: Who we are is how we lead, and who we are is how we coach. Authenticity in coaching is about being true to oneself and also to the coachee. It is about having honest and open coaching conversations, leading to a greater understanding of the self and the coachee. This makes us more authentic as a coach, and ultimately spills over to the other aspects of our life, where we then become more authentic as a leader and as a person. While we need to respect societal and organizational norms, I have found that the best way to build a strong connect is to be myself, irrespective of who I am dealing with.???

Curiosity: Curiosity is about having an open mind, being willing to explore, discover and learn together. It is about our willingness to go on a journey of discovery with the coachee without judging. It is about our ability to ask incisive questions to peel the onion to get to the heart of the matter.?Curiosity might have killed the cat, but it sure can bring alive the coachee. Over the years, my passion for photography and marketing have kindled an innate sense of curiosity in me to look at things from multiple perspectives and actively seek new experiences. This has helped me broaden my perspective and have a more holistic approach.???

Empathy: Empathy is about walking in the other person’s shoes without wearing them. It is about deep listening and truly feeling what the other person is going through. In her work, Brene Brown talks about empathy as the antidote to shame, which she goes on to define as the intensely painful feeling of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love. Empathy is not to be confused with sympathy. Some of the traps to watch out for while empathizing are as follows: “my problem’s bigger”, “look at the bright side” or “why don’t you do this…”. Many years ago I learnt about the importance of “listening with ting”- the art of listening with all my senses including my heart, and that has helped me become more empathetic.??

In my coaching journey, I have seen that being mindful of these 4 aspects in can elevate the quality of the coaching conversations and truly add value to the coachee. And in the process, we add value to ourselves, become better coaches, better leaders and ultimately better human beings. Do go ahead and set your own PACE!!