Be sensitive while discussing certain issues...

Let's talk about how to take an uncomfortable sensitive conversation and change it in to a comfortable one with a positive outcome.

Having uncomfortable conversation specially the professional one about behavior and actions is always tough.

Let's take an example... I've to talk with someone with whom I work and is always late. How do I initiate the conversation without offending the concerned person.

Here comes the '4 Step process' to address sensitive issues and result will be positive at the end. So the 4 Step process is:

Step 1- Address: Don't address the individual behavior or the actions but address a 'pattern'. Speak in the Third person so the person involved doesn't feel like he/she is being isolated.

For instance, in my case I would say to the person who is always late that " I have noticed there has been a bit of pattern of lateness recently."

Step 2- Admit: And then I will admit that " I know personally, sometimes when I feel like juggling too many things, I start showing up late because I have too many things on my mind".

What I am doing here is I am taking the focus off that individual and now both of us are looking at it separately as a pattern of behavior that we are both guilty of, which means I am more likely to communicate about it.

Step 3- Assess: Third step is to 'Assess'. Now I will assess the situation, get the other person's ideas, his reasoning, his perspective on 'Why this pattern is occurring?'

And the last question we can ask that- Now we know why it is happening and what do you think would be the best way to move forward and what should we do about it?

Step 4- Act: Get their ideas, agree with their ideas and come up with a good next step-It has to have an ending...So why can't we try for a month and see how it works and if it doesn't work, we will try something else.

So, there are 4 steps -Address, Admit,Assess & Act...This is how we take an uncomfortable and sensitive conversation and change it in to a comfortable conversation with a positive outcome.