Selling is Caring

When selling is done correctly, the salesperson leads with facts to engage their prospective buyer and supports those statements with their (well-informed) opinion. Selling, in its simplest terms, is sharing the benefits of a service with enough conviction to increase the likelihood that a purchase is made.

Selling requires a generous amount of sharing as the salesperson must be a willing sharer- sharing the advantages that the product has when compared to the offerings of a competitor, sharing the benefits gained by past customers and sharing their time with each prospect. As a parent of two young children I am very well aware of the fact that ‘sharing is caring’ so, by extension, that must mean that Selling is all about Caring.

Salespeople should care about everything- and I mean EVERY thing. The winning salesperson cares about the thrill of the win as much as understanding why they made (or did not make) the sale. They care about learning just as much as earning. They care about their appearance as much as their perseverance.

The successful salesperson cares about what makes people tick and how to not tick them off, because people (not machines) are still the ones who make buying decisions. They understand that it’s not as important to get the prospect to buy; instead they care about making sure that other person does not want to say bye to the deal.

The best salespeople care about looking good in front of their bosses and peers, but most importantly they care about impressing the person in the mirror. They care about achieving goals and hitting their numbers- whether it be for bragging rights, stock rights or just to say that they were right.

So long story longer, they care a lot. For the new salesperson, aiming to care about everything seems like it should be rather attainable and an expected trait. It’s a simple goal (and when given the choice, always choose simple), yet the all-caring salesperson is much more rare than the army of sellers that have mastered various sets of sales skills.

Why is that? After all, we provide our salespeople with endless training, reinforcement and tips. Additionally, they have instant access to sales veterans that have designed programs that ‘guarantee you will close more deals.’ Look closer, the aforementioned guidance typically focuses on process- the What, How and When you say or do something.

The Why is missing, and caring is all about the Why, both yours and theirs. There is no one or right way to bring this attitude into your selling reality. However, in my experiences, I have found that mastering the following four behaviors will show your prospects and customers that you truly CARE. These are not battle-hardened sales tactics, instead they are interpersonal traits - being Curious, Attentive, Relatable and able to Energize the other person.

Please note, the below examples are applicable to B2B selling.

Curiosity has the ability to do several impressive feats including humbling the know-it-all, silencing the motor mouth and relaxing a tension-filled room. Be curious about their company, their role and their expertise (you will have time to demonstrate your expertise later). This is a universal trait of winners- the most successful people in life have an unyielding appetite for learning.

The curious salesperson gathers information that will help them during this sale (as well as subsequent ones) and allows them to decipher the prospect’s buyer persona. It also keeps the other person talking which is extremely helpful for the new or talkative salesperson, as well as when you are faced with a prospect that provides one to two word responses.

When all else fails, remember that it is okay to ask a question even if you already know the answer- “You told me that the last company you worked with let you down, correct?” “That’s what I recalled, so how has the impacted you and your team since then?” Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it can also save a seller (in somewhat related news, the origin of the saying is quite aptly ‘care killed the cat,’ but that’s a topic for another day).

Having an Attentive salesperson is what every customer not-so-secretly craves during the buying cycle, but they probably cannot tell you exactly what that looks like in action. It starts with being an attentive listener, which might be the most underrated sales skill. This means being a fully engaged listener that is focused on understanding what is being said, instead of just listening for affirmations to your assumptions or simply waiting for your turn to speak.

The successful salesperson certainly uses their listening skills to hear what the other person is saying, but they also hear loudly what they are not saying. If they won’t answer a question directly, it typically means they are either withholding information or they are not the ‘keeper’ of that information. This behavior has the two-pronged effect of allowing the salesperson to win more deals and also spend less time on ill-fitting prospects.

The second half of this approach is responding to the information you have captured. Being attentive to their needs could mean providing them with case studies post-meeting or hearing them vent about their current-state. Being able to provide what they need at the right moment creates space for a future sale to be made. It may mean going an extra step or the extra mile, but this demonstrates that you care.

Relatability might not be a surprising entry on this list, but it also is an under-utilized tactic. Every salesperson has been pre-programmed to do their share of pre-meeting research and follow it up by looking around the office of their prospect in order to identify commonalities. So yes, try to build rapport as alumni of the same college, with your similar taste in music or through a shared interest in a niche hobby. But no, this does not do enough to check the ‘this person relates well to others’ box.

Instead, the best salespeople engage in an ongoing effort to get on the same level as the buyer through mirroring dialogue, matching their energy and by referencing small details that were previously disclosed. Find ways to show the prospect that you “have been there before” whether it be a past customer that was in a similar situation or by commiserating about dealing with the ‘terrible twos’ on the home front. On another note, clearly state your follow-up plan that includes next steps, even if they are simple and straightforward. It reinforces that you are reliable, which is important to buyers (even the unreliable ones).

It’s not always easy to make a new purchase or picture what a resolved issue looks like, so it’s up to the salesperson to paint that masterpiece by being an effective and engaging storyteller. When you consider that B2B buying can produce similar anxieties as B2C buying and that many people are naturally on ‘high alert’ when talking to a salesperson, the salesperson must be deliberate in the way that they present and market their capabilities. Don’t be just another salesperson or even a surprisingly pleasant one. Push yourself to move beyond the friend zone and into the relatable zone.

Of course, an Energetic salesperson is preferred to its dull counterpart. However, much like where the primary attention of the salesperson should be, let’s shift the focus to the buyer. An easy barometer when tracking the likelihood of a sale is whether the prospect left the meeting in a more interested state than prior to the meeting. The goal is to inspire them to spring into action, energizing them to think more critically about their issue/opportunity and begin involving other necessary purchasing parties.

There is a tipping point in every transaction, the meeting or moment when the buyer decides they will actually make a purchase (and with which seller). That is where the deal can finally be won. But much earlier in the process is a point, perhaps we can call it the teetering point, where most deals are lost. What motivates them evolves over time. Initially, you are trying to build their interest during an opening pitch. Later on, you must display a clear benefit they will receive based on their situation and goals.

There’s already a lot of energy talk in the above paragraphs, so forgive me in advance, but I want to talk about momentum. Whether you are thinking about it in scientific or sports terms, momentum can be difficult to stop once it picks up enough speed. After a few positive meetings, a few times of increasing their awareness of their current pain points and getting a few of their colleagues similarly energized, it becomes more difficult for them to walk away from a potential deal.

In conclusion, the path to caring more can be better described as a never-ending journey. The above skills also serve as a roadmap to be more consistent in your approach and control what is actually within your control: Being prepared (Curiosity), having a positive attitude/mindset (Attentive), guiding the narrative and flow of the dialogue (Relatable), and demonstrating your value (Energize).

With practice, you will find it easier to lean into these skills, and begin to notice how well these behaviors complement each other. For example, curiosity without sufficient attentiveness (and vice versa) has very limited returns. However, when done in harmony, the result can be astounding and the buyer may be more willing to divulge more situational details than originally planned.

Sales does not need to be a grueling standoff and it should not be considered rocket science with a textbook of methodologies to dictate how you respond to each situation… keep it simple, keep it human and always be willing to CARE a little bit more.