Self Transformation: More Unlearning than learning to do

“Transformation is often more about unlearning than learning” – Richard Rohr - Leading to Unlock. The painting stimulates excitement and revelation on what can be, when we take the time to revel in how great we really are. Transformation is about the journey, not the destination!

Jessie Cohen Shternshus mentions this model of unlearning, "It is important for leaders to notice the shifts around them, and adjust accordingly in order to remain competitive. Many companies make the mistake of becoming complacent; “it worked just fine last year, so why change?” They take pride in their old successes and forget to stay curious and pay attention to necessary changes." Unlearning is Challenging, So, how should you start unlearning? Here are some ideas given by Jessie which are workable: Be in the moment, be mindful. Avoid relying on your old habits, and fully experience the present. · Do Experimentation and try our new things. Use models of experimentation and don’t be afraid to make mistakes. · Let go of assumptions. Pretend that you are a child again, experiencing the world for the first time. · Be curious, Always ask “why” · Shut down your inner critic.Don’t let your Judge Judy stop you from pursuing your ideas. · De-familiarisation.See the strangeness of the ordinary. Let’s practice. Think through your own process of unlearning. Write down what you would like to unlearn this year and what you would like to make room for.

Charlie Hedges says, “Repentance.” Yeah, that is a pretty religious word with all kinds of negative implications. But the Greek meaning of the word is simply “to change one’s mind.” Now changing your mind is not always quite so easy. We are immersed in a “my way or the highway” culture, in which many people truly believe their way is the right way and anyone that doesn’t agree is an idiot. On the other hand, there’s a phrase going around that goes something like, “the older I get the less I know.” I disagree. The older I get the more I know. I am getting smarter. But I can also say this, “the older I get the less I know for sure.” At thirty-five I was sure about a lot more than I am at sixty-eight."

As an adult it is not so easy to unlearn many things we have learnt in life because all these years of life we keep on learning new things and some of them we hardly use, however whenever we are undergoing transformation into a better individual, we need to actually do the analysis of our own habits good, bad, ugly and learn to forget them one by one in the interest of getting transformed into a different and better person.

I love learning all the time and I spend a great deal of my time trying to learn more about myself and the world. But I rarely think about unlearning something -- and, now that I'm pondering it, it seems like it could be just as important as learning! Unlearning really is the key to transformation, to making those big changes in your life that can help you feel more positive and present. We all have things we'd be better off unlearning -- bad habits, negative thinking patterns, etc. -- but, as you might already know, unlearning is actually much more challenging than learning. Instead of simply absorbing new information, you have to remove what you already know (or change the way you think about it) and that's hard. Especially if it's been something you've been doing or thinking for years and years. 

What's the very first thing that comes to your mind to unlearn? That's the thing you really want to unlearn " Negative things in life" and that's what you need to fully commit to undoing. If you don't fully commit to the unlearning process, trust me, it'll never work. A motivating factor to keep you going when the unlearning gets hard. For example, let's say you want to unlearn "negative thinking" about life. The reasons why you might want to do this could include: to feel better about yourself, to cultivate more self-love, to become a better role model for your children or friends, to be more a peace with who you are. It is then easier to unlearn being negative all the time and keep practising that we are transforming into a positive looking person. This is a real challenge unlearning negativity and taking up positivity in life, but it helps without doubt, try out some unlearning today and find it helps!